Anger Issues: How To Understand And Navigate Anger

Medically reviewed by April Justice, LICSW
Updated November 13, 2024by BetterHelp Editorial Team

According to a study published in the journal CNS Spectrums, 7.8% of U.S. adults experience “inappropriate, intense, or poorly controlled anger.” Anger issues can lead to numerous challenges in an individual’s relationships with friends, family, coworkers, and romantic partners. In some cases, uncontrolled anger can even lead to legal problems if a person acts in a threatening or violent way. 

Below, we’ll explore anger issues and ways to control anger before it gets out of hand, including working with a licensed mental health professional.

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Are you experiencing anger issues?

Anger is a normal response

While some people may think of this emotion as a sign of anger management issues, anger can be a natural response to frustrating situations. According to Harvard Health Publishing, anger is a normal response when a person believes they have been threatened, harmed, or treated unfairly, whether physically, emotionally, financially, or in some other way. 

A person might feel angry when they sense they are powerless to change a situation, such as a breakup or job loss. This can be a normal temporary response to challenging situations. 

What are anger issues?

While “anger issues” is not an official diagnosis, this term can refer to unhealthy anger. Anger issues typically go beyond a normal, justified response to being harmed. Someone with anger management challenges may experience outbursts that are disproportionate to the cause of their anger, potentially triggering violent behavior, self-destructive actions, or emotional challenges.  They may lose control of their anger despite numerous attempts to manage it appropriately.

How can anger issues affect a person at work?

Individuals experiencing challenges with anger may find themselves shouting at people or engaging in passive-aggressive behavior at work, which can have repercussions on their relationships with their colleagues. Some people with anger problems may develop a pattern of losing their jobs as a result of poorly controlled anger. This can affect them financially and may make it difficult to find new jobs. 

How can problems with anger affect a person’s personal relationships?

Anger problems can negatively impact personal relationships in a number of ways. People who have trouble expressing anger in a controlled way. They may have outbursts toward their family members, friends, or significant others. In some cases, they may become verbally or physically abusive. 

They may also use passive-aggressive behaviors such as the silent treatment to convey their anger indirectly. These patterns or anger can lead to feelings of resentment or mistrust, relationship instability, and frequent breakups.

Anger management: Control anger before it controls you

Individuals experiencing challenges with anger management might consider using a variety of techniques to manage their anger. The following are a few strategies that may prove helpful.

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Deep breathing exercises

Some people may find that breathing exercises can reduce their anger in the moment. According to the American Psychological Association, it may be helpful to breathe deeply from the diaphragm rather than from the chest. After a few minutes of gentle, slow breathing, individuals with anger management problems may have lower blood pressure and notice their anger has subsided.

Visualization

Another potentially helpful strategy is to use imagery or visualization. You might try to find a quiet place and imagine a relaxing situation. This could be a relaxing place that you have visited or an imaginary setting. 

For example, you might bring to mind your favorite vacation spot or a peaceful memory from childhood. You could also imagine yourself walking along a relaxing path in nature. It may help to imagine specific details about this place, such as the sights, sounds, and scents of the scene. 

By mentally staying in this place for a few minutes, you may be able to calm your anger, and then return to the situation in a better position to respond rather than react. 

Progressive muscle relaxation

Developed by Dr. Edmond Jacobson in the 1920s, progressive muscle relaxation generally refers to the practice of tensing and then relaxing various muscle groups. When you notice signs of anger, you may benefit from dropping what you’re doing and going to a quiet place. If you can’t remove yourself from the situation, you can still practice progressive muscle relaxation where they are, even if you’re sitting at a desk at work. 

Start with the muscles in the feet by tightening them for five seconds and then releasing the tension. Next, move up to the calves, proceeding upward throughout various muscle groups. 

Getting mental health support with anger, anxiety, and other challenges

While the above strategies may help during a moment of anger, people who experience a pattern of anger management challenges may benefit from speaking with a therapist. In some cases, anger may be related to former experiences, such as abuse or trauma

A therapist may be able to help individuals explore the underlying causes of their anger. A therapist may use cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) to help people identify and challenge negative or inaccurate thoughts about themselves. 

According to the American Psychological Association, one CBT practice that therapists may use for anger is stress inoculation. During this process, individuals may be exposed to imaginary situations that tend to provoke anger. In this safe space, they may be able to monitor what they’re experiencing and practice coping skills that may help them in real-life situations.

Some therapists may also recommend family therapy to heal relationships that have been affected by anger management difficulties. Others may use psychodynamic therapy to help individuals explore the root causes of their anger and distress. 

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Are you experiencing anger issues?

Can online mental health services help with anger issues and anxiety?

Some individuals might not be comfortable discussing sensitive topics like anger in traditional in-person therapy. In these cases, it may be beneficial to connect with a therapist online. Online therapy generally allows individuals to speak with a therapist about their challenges with anger from the comfort of home or anywhere with an internet connection. Therapy sessions can take place via audio, video, or live chat for those who prefer to communicate about their anger in writing.

In recent years, numerous studies have demonstrated the effectiveness of online therapy for various mental health conditions. A study from 2017 found online cognitive behavioral therapy to be effective for generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, bipolar disorder, and substance use disorder, all of which may occur alongside anger management challenges.  

Takeaway

Anger issues can stem from a variety of causes and affect a person’s emotions and relationships at work, home, and school. In some cases, problems with anger may be related to a traumatic experience or abuse during childhood. Regardless of the cause, individuals with anger problems can use a variety of strategies to quell their anger, including deep breathing, visualization, and progressive muscle relaxation. They may also benefit from speaking with a licensed therapist online or in person. A mental health professional may use cognitive behavioral therapy techniques to help them identify inaccurate thoughts about themselves that could be contributing to their anger.

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