Managing Anger With Healthy Habits

Anger is a natural emotion that, when handled appropriately, can sometimes lead to positive change. Research has found that feeling angry can spur creativity or lead to a desire to correct social injustices. However, anger can also lead to actions that harm both the person experiencing anger and the people around them. It’s typically how we cope with anger that makes the difference of whether anger is productive or not. 

Whether you're learning how to stop yourself from feeling angry over certain situations, how to stop your anger from getting out of hand, or how to calm yourself down once you're angry, you can learn to manage your anger by building healthy habits that are good for your body and mind.

Below, we’ll discuss anger, its effects on mental and physical health, and evidence-based habits to reduce anger and stress.

How anger can affect your health

Anger can negatively affect you in several ways. For one, anger can increase your stress, and stress can cause a host of health concerns, including ulcers, migraines, digestive problems, and other physical concerns. The physical effects of uncontrolled anger can increase your risk of health problems that can continue to manifest long after that anger has subsided.

Anger and mental health

Stress and anger can also cause mental health concerns. Letting angry emotions fester and build in your mind may cause you to dwell on situations that make you angry. Even when you don't voice your feelings, you may start remembering different times that you felt similarly, and those may continue to build up until you find yourself blowing up at someone over a minor disagreement, which can affect not only your relationships but also your mental health. 

Anger and aggression

When it comes to anger and other people, one of the biggest concerns is that you could act out against others. Whether you strike out at them physically or verbally, both are abusive and can have serious consequences. Verbal abuse and physical abuse have been known to result in extreme feelings for both the person on the receiving end and the person who inflicts harm. If you develop a habit of showing your anger in harmful ways, you may find yourself losing relationships or hurting the people around you.

If you are experiencing trauma, support is available. Please see our Get Help Now page for more resources.

Managing anger with healthy habits

If you’re experiencing challenges with anger, you may benefit from trying some evidence-based ways to manage your anger and to improve your physical and mental health. If you're conscientious about your anger and you learn how to implement these strategies, you may find that anger becomes much less important in your life. You may also feel a sense of freedom from the things that trigger your anger.

Talk about your feelings

Repressing your feelings likely won’t make you feel better, and it could make you feel worse. Also, you may be more likely to blow up over a future perceived insult or problem if you don’t express your feelings. Holding in your feelings may also cause you more stress and potential health problems. Instead, you might try to vent either to yourself or to someone that you trust, such as a friend or a licensed therapist. This may help you get your feelings out in a more positive manner.

Do deep breathing exercises

By breathing deeply, you may find that you can decrease the tension in your body. It may also help you to relax your muscles, calm your heart rate, and decrease anxiety—all of which may help you respond with rational thought rather than reacting with anger.

Take time to understand

Rather than dismiss your anger every time you feel angry, it may help to take some time to understand why you feel that way. It may be normal for you to feel angry in some situations, and it may help to assess whether you’re experiencing a situation where anger is appropriate. You might think back to what made you angry and why you reacted the way that you did. You might also consider whether you were already upset before a specific trigger occurred. By exploring the situation, you may learn more about how to handle similar situations in the future without getting as angry.

Walk away

When you walk away from an anger-inducing situation, you can give yourself some breathing room. Separating yourself from a situation that leads to anger can make it easier for you to diffuse the situation. If you continue going toe-to-toe with someone, it can be difficult to talk the situation down as tempers can escalate further. If you can walk away for a few minutes and get some time to breathe before you return to the person or situation that made you angry, you may be less likely to act out in anger and more likely to respond calmly and constructively.

Laugh it off

If you can laugh, you may be able to diffuse stressful situations. Research shows that laughter can reduce the effects of stress in a number of ways. According to the Mayo Clinic, laughter can relax your muscles, increase endorphins, and activate and then relieve your body’s stress response. 

If you decide to try using laughter to calm down and relieve anger, it may be helpful to first walk away from a stressful situation so that others don’t think you’re laughing at them. Once you’re alone, you might watch something humorous online or reach out to a friend who tends to make you laugh. Even if you don’t feel like laughing when you start, you may end up laughing. Laughter may help you get rid of your anger and allow you to approach the situation differently.

Get some exercise

Research shows that exercise causes the body to produce endorphins, which may relieve tension if you’re experiencing anger. Physical activity can also lead to greater availability of naturally occurring chemicals in your brain, such as serotonin and dopamine, and it can also burn off some excess energy that could otherwise be directed in an unhealthy way. 

When you get angry, your body may have a fight-or-flight response, and you may have excess energy in your body unless you find a way to get rid of it. Exercise can be an effective way to do just that.

Seeking professional help for anger management

In addition to adopting some of the above habits for anger management, it may help to speak with a licensed therapist about your anger. A therapist may be able to help you identify what makes you angry and find ways to skillfully handle anger. If you don’t feel comfortable with traditional in-office therapy, you might benefit from online therapy, which many peer-reviewed studies have shown to be effective. 

Hundreds of studies have assessed the effectiveness of therapy for anger management problems. Research suggests that approximately 75% of people who have received anger management therapy have experienced improvement. One of the most researched forms of therapy for anger is called cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), which tends to teach people how to identify and change negative and inaccurate thought patterns. One type of CBT for anger is called stress inoculation, which aims to help individuals identify anger triggers and allows them to practice coping methods in situations involving the triggers.

Effectiveness of online therapy at helping control anger

Studies have found that online CBT is just as effective as in-person therapy. In fact, a recent study found that just four weeks of an online therapeutic intervention for anger and aggression were effective in helping reduce anger problems. With online therapy at BetterHelp, you can connect with a licensed therapist via phone, live chat, videoconferencing, or a combination of these methods. You can also contact your therapist at any time via in-app messaging, and they’ll respond as soon as they can. This may be especially useful if you experience triggers in between sessions.