Why Someone Is Picking on You: The Causes of Bullying
No matter the cause of bullying, it may harm those affected. Even though it is typically thought of as something that kids go through in their youth or during their school years, bullying can occur at any age. If you’ve been bullied in the past or are currently being bullied, reaching out to someone you care about could be beneficial and help you feel comfortable.
Often, severe underlying issues could cause a bully to target someone, which can result in the victim experiencing negative mental health effects like PTSD from bullying. While these causes may not justify a bully’s actions, they could shed some light on why someone acts in unkind ways. Read more to find out about the psychology of bullying.
What are some causes of bullying?
Why do people bully? There are a few common potential reasons why people bully and display aggressive behavior. Those who partake in bullying may benefit from learning the reasons behind their urges or bad behavior and working with a professional to increase positive and empathetic behaviors.
Helplessness or a lack of control
People who feel helpless or out of control in their personal lives may search for other ways to express their frustration if they don’t have healthy coping mechanisms. For some, this may take the form of choosing to inflict physical or emotional harm on others to feel in control.
Violence at home
People who exhibit bullying behavior towards others may have experienced violence at home by parents or other adults. When they face abuse, some individuals may conclude that bullying someone else may be the only way to express their anger and pain.
Bullies might resort to violence against their victims because it could be what they were taught was acceptable in their household. To address this cause of bullying, the abuse happening at home may also need to be addressed.
The bully views you as a threat
People who see you as a threat to any aspect of their life may try to go after your confidence or status with aggression. If you are successful, attractive, intelligent, or causing unwanted changes in someone’s life, they may bully you to “bring you down.” They may try to make you feel so bad about yourself that you can’t thrive around them.
Poor self-esteem
Feelings of inadequacy may be common in people who bully others. With low self-esteem, they may feel poorly about themselves compared to you. This feeling might cause them to lash out or try to bring others down. If this continues, it could create a toxic dynamic that may cause serious damage to both parties.
Feeling the need for negative attention
People who want more attention from their peers or families might sometimes resort to negative behaviors to meet this need. In this case, bullying might be a “cry for help.”
If someone is bullying another individual because they feel alone or unseen, they may need to be guided to safer alternatives. Counseling, self-help books, or support groups may be beneficial.
Trying to maintain social status
Some individuals may participate in bullying because they feel it’s an appropriate reaction based on the actions of those in their social circle. If they witnessed someone being bullied by a close friend or friends, they might be more liable to join in on the harassment.
Some people may feel they’re joking or having fun, while others may worry about the bullies turning on them in their group if they speak up. Whatever the reason for people piling on, there may be a “mob mentality” in social situations.
They don’t tolerate some parts of your personality
People who do not love themselves or feel pride in their identity may feel uncomfortable around others who do. If you have an aspect of your identity that you’re proud of, they may choose to bully you for it.
They may also target your identity because certain prejudices have been passed down through their family, social media, or a news source. This type of bullying which targets race, gender, physical disability, or sexual orientation, is often considered a “hate crime” and may be reported to the authorities.
They have an elevated idea of themselves (ego)
People who believe they are more important than others or who have managed to achieve success and fame may be prone to bullying.
They might have learned from experience that others do not speak up if they act in unkind ways because they are popular or successful, which may lead to a low perceived risk while bullying. They may also enjoy a feeling of control or power over someone else.
It may feel challenging to fight this type of bullying unless the bully realizes that treating others poorly may not help them have a happy or successful life
The importance of bully prevention
You may have heard the expression, “hurt people hurt people.” Past trauma, violence, abuse, neglect, or many other factors may launch a cycle of recurring behavior that echoes down through the years. Medically reviewed research shows that the effects of bullying also has the potential to cause post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), along with other long term effects like anxiety or depression, in those who are a target of the behavior.
If you are experiencing trauma, support is available. Please see our Get Help Now page for more resources.
The prevalence of youth being bullied on social media
For schools and school staff, bullying is a major problem, according to stopbullying.gov, roughly one in five young people between the ages of 12 and 18 experience bullying. In today’s digital culture, much of this takes place online through cyberbullying where the rules are often much more open than at school. This government organization recommends numerous steps to respond to and create a culture of bullying prevention.
If specific supports do not adequately reach those being bullied, the organization recommends a more involved intervention, possibly involving counseling and cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT). CBT practice has shown a high success rate in addressing numerous mental health issues. The success of this treatment has also been demonstrated with online counseling.
How therapy can help mitigate bullying
Bullying is not your fault, regardless of what a bully may tell you. Studies show that bullying can have severe mental health consequences for the target of the abuse. Although bullying may often be a direct result of a troubled personal life, bullying still impacts survivors negatively.
Mental health support for bullying
Those who have been bullied, witnessed bullying, or would like to reduce unkind behaviors in their lives may find support from counseling. Many individuals prefer online counseling over driving to an in-person appointment. If you feel unsafe leaving your home or want to find support, online platforms may offer that opportunity to you.
A review of 17 studies found that online therapy is more affordable when compared to in-person therapy. Another study found that online therapy effectively reduces psychological distress among students. If you’re having any issues with bullying, online counseling can be a practical option. Consider an online platform such as BetterHelp to discuss your feelings and learn new coping mechanisms with a professional.
Takeaway
Is cyberbullying the main cause of depression?
It can be a cause of depression in adolescents, though pinpointing a “main” cause of depression can be complicated, as there are often a number of biological and environmental factors involved. In a 2010 NIH study, researchers found that targets of cyberbullying reported higher levels of depression than the cyber bullies, bully-victims (those who are victims of bullying as well as bullies themselves), or targets of other types of bullying behavior like verbal taunts or physical violence.
More rigorous research is recommended for cyberbullying, but experts find that there are correlations between cyberbullying and depression.
What are the effects of bullying on academic performance, social status, and mental health?
In an analysis published in the Journal of Adolescent Health, researcher Dr. Iannotti shared that bullying can interfere with scholastic achievement, the development of social skills, and with general feelings of well-being.
What are the effects of gender based bullying?
According to research, in general boys are more likely to engage in physical one-on-one encounters, while girls are more likely to engage in more indirect, social bullying, targeting girls with rumors and isolating them into an out-group.
What are the most common types of bullying students experienced?
According to Pew Research, almost half of teens in the United States have experienced online bullying, with offensive name calling and the spreading of false rumors heading the list of offenses. In the school, the classroom is the most common place where adolescents reported being bullied, and being made fun of or the subject of rumors topped the list of in-person offenses.
Types of bullying in the workplace
While bullying is most commonly seen in school settings, bullying in the workplace is still an issue. Some of the most common types of bullying in the workplace include verbal abuse, physical bullying, gesture bullying, exclusion, and corporate bullying. In the workplace, bullying actions may range from starting rumors, to undermining others in front of management, or giving unfair/unattainable tasks and deadlines.
What can cause a bully in a classroom environment?
Bullying and its consequences on academic performance have been widely studied. Feeling unsafe and unseen in a classroom environment can lead to poor academic performance, and cause victims to lash out at others. Called bully-victims, these individuals make up the largest population that are at higher risk of depression.
What is the impact of being bullied over social media?
Experts conjecture that unlike face-to-face confrontation, victims of bullying via social media (cyberbullying) may not identify or see their harasser, subjecting them to feelings of isolation or helplessness.
Is depression caused by abuse?
While studies on the effects of bullying on social media sites has been short term so far, and requires more vigorous long term research, researchers do know that bullying during the teen years may double the risk of adulthood depression, a similar number to those who have experienced child abuse. Trauma experienced in childhood or adolescence can be a common cause of depression, although other factors may be involved.
What are the 5 main causes of gender-based violence?
Five causes of gender-based violence include:
- Patriarchal cultures and harmful gender stereotypes
- Poverty
- A lack of legal protections for those without social status
- Inadequate political representation
- Conflicts and displacement
What are five harmful effects of violence?
Experiencing interpersonal violence, which can include child physical and sexual abuse, bullying, intimate partner violence, and community violence, can all have negative effects on an individual’s mental health. Violence can be associated with the following:
- An increased risk of depression and suicidal ideation
- Substance misuse including smoking, alcohol, and illegal drugs
- Risky behaviors and impaired relationships
- Delinquent behavior
- Chronic illnesses like ulcers, arthritis, or migraines
How to stop gender-based violence?
There are a number of ways that both individuals and communities can contribute to stopping gender-based violence. Here are just a few:
- Financial support for non-profits that protect and uplift women
- Voting on local, state, and national levels for both initiatives and politicians that support women
- Maintaining emergency helplines for women in danger of violence
- Developing and supporting women’s shelters in communities
- Educating others on the causes of and solutions for gender-based violence
- Financially supporting and sharing bullying resources for women and girls
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