Bereavement Counseling UK: Navigate Grief With Mental Health Care
The loss of a loved one can be a difficult experience, often leading to complex emotions and a period of bereavement that can be hard to navigate. Mental health support can help people who are grieving express their emotions, work through the stages of grief, and face day-to-day life without their loved ones. Grief counselling is one such form of support—a type of therapy focused on providing participants the tools to process grief and cope with difficult feelings. Below, we’ll discuss the stages of grief, the importance of bereavement support, and options for grief counselling in the United Kingdom.
Understanding grief
According to the American Psychological Association or APA, grief refers to “the anguish experienced after significant loss, usually the death of a beloved person.” Grief is a universal experience, although it is one that can be especially challenging to face. Bereavement can lead to difficult-to-process emotions like regret, anger, sadness, and longing. It is also associated with mental and physical health concerns and significant life challenges.
The stages of grief
Experts have developed several different frameworks to help us interpret and understand the grieving process. One of the most widely cited frameworks is the Kübler-Ross model, which involves five stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.
- Denial: To avoid confronting their loss, people often ignore or dispute the evidence of the occurrence.
- Anger: Bereaved individuals may express anger toward themselves, the perceived cause of the loss, or even their loved one.
- Bargaining: It is common for people to wonder what they could have done differently or to appeal to a higher power.
- Depression: Hopelessness and sadness are common responses to death.
- Acceptance: Acknowledging and accepting the loss of a loved one often occurs as the last stage of grief.
This framework has been expanded and altered by later models, but it remains a helpful guide for how people go through the grieving process.
Bereavement can affect people differently, so the stages of grief do not necessarily proceed sequentially. For example, bereaved individuals may experience anger first, followed by depression, then acceptance. Some stages may be repeated, and some people may not experience certain stages at all. There is no right or wrong way to grieve a loved one.
The mental health effects of bereavement
People respond to loss in varying ways, so many mental health challenges can arise out of grief. Research shows that around 7% to 10% of bereaved adults will experience prolonged grief disorder, while 5% to 10% of bereaved children will develop a psychiatric disorder related to grief.
Mental health conditions related to grief
Prolonged grief disorder, also called complicated grief, is a mental health condition marked by persistent feelings of sadness and emptiness following a loss. Complicated grief can develop more readily in people who have suddenly lost someone or whose loved ones died under traumatic circumstances. Grief can also lead to depressive disorders, anxiety disorders, post-traumatic stress disorder, and substance use disorder.
The mental health effects of grief are connected to several physical challenges, including chronic pain, sleep disruptions, fatigue, and gastrointestinal distress. These serious impacts of grief highlight the need for effective bereavement support.
The importance of bereavement support
Bereavement support services can help people who are grieving navigate the stages of grief, process complex emotions, and cope with the challenges of life without their loved ones. Additionally, they can contribute to the normalization of the grieving process, helping participants understand that their feelings are healthy and valid. Mental health professionals can also help bereaved individuals utilize their support systems so that they’re able to receive practical forms of care alongside emotional support.
Emotional support
Therapists who provide grief counseling understand the emotional challenges that are connected to the grieving process. Grief counselling can be a safe space for participants to work through challenging feelings and express themselves in various ways. The counsellor can empathize with their clients, help them identify and label their emotions, and provide validation.
The utilization of social support
A mental health professional can be a key addition to a bereaved individual’s support network. Additionally, grief therapists can help people better utilize their existing support systems. For example, they may help clients learn how to communicate their needs to friends, family members, and acquaintances, or they might help participants recognize the people who can best provide support.
Normalizing grief support
Grief can be seen as a normal response to the loss of a family member, friend, or other loved one. For many professionals, one goal of grief support is to ensure participants understand that their feelings are normal and not, in themselves, a sign of a psychological disorder. Normalizing the grieving process can help bereaved individuals avoid being affected by the stigma that many people associate with grief.
How does bereavement counselling work?
A primary purpose of grief counselling is to give the bereaved individual an opportunity to discuss their feelings and thoughts regarding the loss of their loved one. A therapist may prompt the client to talk about the loss they experienced and how it is impacting their life. The individual might also be asked about any mental health conditions that have been caused or exacerbated by the loss. This can help the therapist determine where the client is in the grieving process and how best to proceed with treatment.
Using this information, the counsellor (along with the bereaved individual) can develop care objectives. Normally, the overarching goal of grief therapy is to help the individual accept their loss. Acceptance often involves the ability to move forward in life while recognizing the memory of their loved one. To achieve this objective, several smaller goals may be set. For example, one goal may be for a participant to overcome the desire to bring their friend or family member back.
Grief therapy can look different depending on an individual’s goals and specific mental health concerns. For example, someone struggling to accept the death of a loved one—and, subsequently, experiencing depression—may undergo cognitive behavioral therapy. Using this form of psychotherapy, a bereavement counsellor can help the individual identify and replace unhelpful thoughts that may be underlying depressive symptoms (e.g., that their loved one’s death was their fault).
A grief counsellor can also help participants develop coping techniques for their specific concerns. For example, a therapist may teach an individual with anxiety how to journal about their thoughts and feelings, utilize mindfulness meditation, and practice deep breathing exercises.
Finding bereavement counselling: UK Options
If you’re seeking grief therapy in the United Kingdom, there are several options you can pursue, ranging from the National Health Service or NHS to online therapy.
Working with professionals in individual practice
Grief counselors may work in clinics, hospitals, or their own practices. You can find professionals who offer bereavement counseling through your medical insurance provider. You may also be able to utilize your employee assistance programme if one is available through your employer.
Using the NHS to find bereavement counselling (UK)
You can participate in free counseling sessions by seeking therapy through the NHS. To pursue this option, ask your general practitioner for a referral or find a grief counselor through the NHS’s therapy service.
Connecting with healthcare professionals online
For people who want to work through the stages of grief without leaving home, online therapy platforms are a convenient option for support. Online bereavement support allows participants to connect with a professional without commuting to an office, sitting in a waiting room, or scheduling sessions at potentially inconvenient times.
Support groups
Connecting with people who have experienced similar forms of loss can be helpful. Support group members may be able to empathize with you, share their coping strategies, or simply listen to your story and concerns. Depending on your preferences, you can join a local, in-person grief support group or an online community.
Hospice care
Many hospice facilities provide grief counseling to people whose family members or friends are undergoing end-of-life care. Consider contacting the hospice staff where your loved one is receiving care to find out whether they offer grief support services. You may also be able to use the helplines, informational resources, and other grief-related tools that are available through many hospice care facilities.
Pursuing grief support through online therapy
If you’d like guidance and emotional support during the grieving process or other challenging times, consider online therapy. A mental health professional can help you process your feelings and develop coping strategies as you take steps toward healing.
The benefits of online therapy for bereavement support
With an online therapy platform like BetterHelp, you can participate in grief counselling through video call, voice call, or online chat. You’ll also have the opportunity to message your therapist outside of sessions, allowing you to ask questions about the grieving process or clarify points made during therapy.
The efficacy of working with healthcare professionals online
Research suggests that online therapy is an effective method of providing grief counseling to bereaved individuals. In a meta-analysis that involved seven studies on the efficacy of online bereavement therapy, researchers found that such interventions typically led to significant reductions in symptoms of grief, depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder. The analysis also mentioned the ability of online platforms to overcome common obstacles to treatment, such as stigma, scheduling constraints, and financial limitations.
Takeaway
Losing a loved one can lead to difficult feelings, varied mental health concerns, and serious life challenges. However, with the right forms of support, it is possible to navigate the bereavement process in a healthy way. If you’d like guidance as you work through mental health concerns related to grief, consider getting matched with an online therapist. Connecting with a qualified, compassionate professional can be a productive next step on your healing journey.
Frequently asked questions
What type of counselling is best for bereavement?
Everyone grieves in different ways. For some people, grief involves feeling angry more than sad. For others, they may want to share stories and memories and keep the person’s memory at the forefront of their day. Because grief is so varied, the counselling services and peer support options that help someone grieving a loss can also be varied. Some people benefit from options like acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), whereas others may process a traumatic loss through trauma-informed therapy. Explore grief counseling options near you to learn more about the modalities and how they may be helpful to you.
What qualifications do I need to be a bereavement counselor in the UK?
Many people go through the steps of qualification to become a bereavement counselor, such as getting a degree or certification. You may then register with an accrediting organization like BACP to show your expertise and value in the psychotherapy community. You may benefit from specific training in grief, loss, and bereavement therapy to practice bereavement counseling.
What are the seven stages of grief in the UK?
The seven stages of grief build off the five stages of grief model developed by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross in her book. However, not everyone follows these stages, and some people have come up with other stages that people might go through during grief. According to this model, the seven stages of grief are as follows:
- Shock
- Denial
- Anger
- Bargaining
- Depression
- Testing
- Acceptance
The two stages added to the initial model include shock and testing.
How long should you wait for bereavement counseling?
You can get bereavement counseling at any time. However, you might wait for a few days after the passing if you think going to an appointment would be difficult for you. You can also try online therapy if you want to attend grief therapy from home.
Is bereavement counseling worth it?
Bereavement counseling is frequently used to treat complicated grief, so many clients find it helpful for their experiences. In counseling, you can talk about the loss, explore your emotions, reframe thoughts, and cry if you need to. Some grief counselors use methods like art therapy to help clients express their emotions without having to talk, which can be a useful option for those who don’t like to talk when they’re upset.
What should you not do while grieving?
Many responses to grieving are normal. For example, although you might worry you’re doing something wrong, you’re not alone in feeling numb, angry, or happy after a loss. Many people have complex relationships with grief. The best way to protect yourself and others during this time is to allow yourself to feel how you feel and give yourself space from overwhelming events and situations if possible. Try to forgive yourself for mistakes you make when grieving or before a person’s loss. If you struggle to do so, talking to a bereavement therapist may be helpful, as they can reassure you that what you’re going through is a normal part of grief.
What is the best medication for grief-related depression?
The best medication for an individual depends on their unique body and their doctor’s recommendations. If you’re experiencing extreme grief-related depression, talk to your doctor about starting or changing a medication. You may be able to find support in this way.
The BetterHelp platform is not intended to provide any information regarding which medication or medical treatment may be appropriate for you. The content provides generalized information that is not specific to one individual. Do not take any action without consulting a qualified medical professional.
What makes a good bereavement counsellor?
A good bereavement counselor may be someone who is patient, gentle, and empathetic. They may also be someone who has previously experienced grief or has significant experience studying and treating grief. When clients know they are understood or that their provider is doing their best to give them the best treatment, they may feel safer opening up.
What is the difference between a grief coach and a grief counselor?
A grief coach is someone who offers guidance and advice to someone going through grief. A grief counselor is a mental health professional with qualifications to treat grief-related disorders like complicated grief disorder. Grief coaches can’t offer treatment advice or referrals but may be a helpful, cost-effective option for those who don’t want to dive deep into their experiences.
What is the depression stage of grief?
In the five stages of grief model, the depression stage refers to a stage in which someone becomes sad and withdrawn. They may lose their appetite, sleep too much or too little, and have difficulty taking care of themselves. People in this stage might develop symptoms of a real depressive disorder, which is why taking grief seriously can be important. If you notice signs of depression in yourself or a loved one, reach out for help. You’re not alone.
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