Navigating Having Kids Home For The Summer

Having a home full of the joyful chaos of children in the summer can be a transition some parents may face with mixed emotions. While you may experience excitement about spending quality time with your children, the challenges associated with increased childcare, responsibilities, and noise can lead to patterns of anxious thoughts or parental burnout. 

Understanding these emotions and learning techniques to reduce or alleviate them can help parents navigate the summer season with little ones. It may also be helpful to explore emotions often associated with having kids home during summer months, tips to create a balanced environment, and how a therapist can be a valuable support option. 

Is it normal for parents to experience negative emotions during the summer months?

It can be normal for parents to experience negative emotions in the summer. Parenting is a full-time job that often doesn’t offer a break, especially in the summer when children are home all day. Parental burnout and parental guilt are two common experiences for parents during the summer months.

It may be beneficial to know these experiences are normal, and even the most patient caregiver can have their limits and bad days. These moments don’t define your worth or ability as a parent. Instead, understanding these experiences and prioritizing your mental health can be a chance to model real-life coping strategies for your child or children.

Understanding parental burnout with kids

The pressures of providing continuous care, coupled with other responsibilities, can lead to parental burnout, a state of intense exhaustion, emotional detachment, and reduced personal accomplishment. Parental burnout can significantly affect your ability to perform in other areas of life, such as your job, hobbies, or personal relationships. It can also reduce mental health, making you susceptible to conditions like anxiety and depression.                                         

Avoiding burnout means maintaining a healthier, happier lifestyle, which may contribute to a positive environment for your family. Because the effort you give to yourself can have a ripple effect, prioritizing self-care and taking time to rest and rejuvenate can be essential. 

Understanding parental guilt with kids

Parental guilt often accompanies exhaustion in mothers, fathers, parents, and caregivers. In a recent study, participants continually expressed frustration over desiring time away from their children, leading to maternal guilt and self-doubt.          

Parental guilt can creep up for numerous reasons, whether it’s themed around wanting time alone or wanting to attend to professional tasks. You may experience guilt related to wanting to spend time away from your children. However, understand that such experiences are common among parents. It can be normal for people to want a break and have responsibilities outside their parental role.

How to find a supportive environment with kids

During the summer months, a supportive environment can make a significant difference in your mental well-being. Regardless of what type of support you build, try to carve out time to dive into activities that incite positive emotions. 

Creating a balance between family and personal time can be crucial for maintaining your well-being. For example, you could try meditation, mindful movement, sports, hobbies, professional endeavors, or any activity that may help you nurture a sense of calm and relaxation, including but not limited to the following. 

Lean on a partner, family member, or friend

Support from partners, family members, and friends can significantly reduce the parenting load. An effective strategy could be to schedule regular “nights off,” allowing others to take over childcare duties. Consider creating a neighborhood rotation system for watching kids or organizing play dates and communal activities to divide the load of keeping kids occupied.  

Find support from other parents 

Building a community with other parents online or in your area may be a lifeline during summer breaks. Joining local or online parent support groups can help you exchange ideas, advice, and experiences. 

Enlist a regular babysitter

Having a scheduled night off every week may help you push through more difficult moments. Additionally, with a regular babysitter, you can build a sense of trust and stability over time, and your kids may become more accustomed to their presence. It also allows you time to nurture your relationship with your partner and engage in activities like love making so you can maintain a healthy relatiosnhip with one another. 

If you are looking for a lower-cost option and plan to stay home, consider looking for a “mother’s helper” on local babysitting websites. Mother’s helpers are younger babysitters who can look after children while you attend to other tasks within the home.

Nine ideas for a balanced summer schedule with kids

A well-planned schedule can bring order to the potentially chaotic summer days. Starting the day with a steady morning routine may set the tone for the rest of the day. Routines can offer a sense of structure and reduce anxiety for several members of the family. The schedule doesn’t have to be rigid, but having a basic outline for how most days are spent may make the extra hours at home less daunting. In addition, you may begin to find what times are most effective. 

When building your summer schedule, consider incorporating a mix of learning activities, household chores, and playtime, allowing kids to freely explore and use their imagination. Include a few fun traditions as well. You can consider the following activities. 

Unstructured playtime provides so much fun

While spending quality time with your kids can be wonderful, letting them play alone or with siblings may be equally beneficial. Unstructured play can foster independence and creativity. Don’t feel like you need to offer boredom busters every time you hear “I’m bored!” from one of your kids. 

In addition, you can take time for yourself during this time. A well-rested and relaxed parent may better handle the challenges that come their way. 

Art projects

Fun for kids doesn’t necessarily mean expensive outings or fancy toys. At home, quiet games, crafting sessions, or DIY art projects can be fun ways to stimulate creativity. For a toddler, art time may involve the chance to draw with sidewalk chalk or trace shapes. As kids get older, they may like to follow online drawing tutorials or create items to decorate their room. Grab some versatile art supplies like paper, craft sticks, and pom poms at the local craft store, and your kids may spend hours creating something new. 

Mealtimes and bedtime

Having consistent meals and bedtimes may offer a sense of structure in your day. In addition, a routine can help you plan in advance. For example, you can prepare for key events several days ahead by preparing lunches or ensuring you are home from activities at a particular time. 

It doesn’t take much to add some excitement into mealtime. Cut toast into fun shapes or use breakfast food items to make a cute picture. If you need to pack lunch, add an encouraging note for your child to find when they eat. On rainy days, you can lay a blanket on the living room floor for a cozy picnic dinner. 

Chores

While chores may not be the focal point of every summer day, teaching kids to contribute to their environment and living space can instill a sense of pride and responsibility. Try making chores fun by having your children pick them out of a hat or offering prizes for those who remember their chores without being reminded. You can also create a game out of chores or make them about quality time by getting your kids involved in what you’re doing. 

Local activities

Local summer camps, libraries, and community centers often offer affordable and fun activities for kids to enjoy without relying on you as a source of entertainment. Some may be indoor activities, so having an indoor activity in mind for rainy days could be helpful. Local camps and events also give them the opportunity to be in a group with children of similar ages, which can be especially helpful for more outgoing kids.

Outdoor play

Family vacation

Family vacations may offer a refreshing change of scene and common experiences that build bonds and create lasting memories at various locations. Planning one or two family vacations for your summer schedule may give you and your kids an event to look forward to outside of your day-to-day routine. Consider all-inclusive resorts for a worry-free break, locations with kid-friendly excursions for activities for kids, or a family cruise for a mix of relaxation and fun things at a lower cost. 

Vacations don’t have to be fancy to be remembered as so much fun. If funds are tight, plan a staycation where you explore your city or schedule a holiday visit to visit friends in a nearby city. 

Personalize your kids room

Summer is a great time to make your kid’s room function for their needs. Of course it’s fun to decorate based on your child’s personality, but this is just one aspect of improving their room. Work together while they’re home to develop systems that make their day go more smoothly, like a clothes-hanging routine that keeps their clothes off the floor or decluttering the toys they no longer play with. 

Embracing the unplanned

While routines can be beneficial, so is flexibility. Some of the most memorable moments may come from spontaneous decisions or a random fun idea. Whether you make a sudden decision to make homemade ice cream, have a family movie night, play board games, or go on a family hike, these unplanned activities can bring joy and relaxation to the whole family.

Support options for parents 

Therapy can be an invaluable tool for parents during the hectic summer months of school vacation. However, a busy schedule can be a barrier to in-person support. In these cases, online therapy through a platform like BetterHelp may be a beneficial way to find coping strategies when your kids aren’t listening or an outlet for expressing pent-up frustrations. 

The convenience of online therapy can be an advantage in the summer months. With sessions that fit your schedule, you may not have to worry about finding childcare or arranging transportation. Instead, you can find a personal space and an internet connection to connect with a licensed professional who can provide strategies and techniques for managing stress and other challenges. 

Research has shown that online cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), one of the most common types of therapy offered online, can be effective for a range of conditions, including depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). These are all conditions that parents may be at risk of. Some online therapy platforms also provide therapy that includes specific strategies for managing stress related to parenting, which has been shown to significantly improve parent-child relationships, perceived parenting effectiveness, and other family-related challenges.