The Joy Of Work Friends: How Making Friends At Work Can Improve Mental Health

Meaningful, healthy connections can support your mental health and well-being. In general, humans are built for connection, social support, and belonging, with neurons and neurotransmitters that respond positively to the affection, care, and love of others. Because many people spend significant amounts of time at work, social connections often fall by the wayside. Making friends in the workplace can be a way to combat social isolation and find positive and fun interactions in your daily environment. However, if you find it challenging to connect with others, working with a therapist may help you develop effective communication skills to foster friendship. 

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The benefits of work friendships

It’s thought that about one-third (approximately 90,000 hours) of a person’s life is spent at work. A person’s career is often strongly linked to their sense of inspiration and purpose in their professional and personal lives, and people worldwide may work to support their families, goals, and financial aspirations. 

However, because a significant amount of time goes into one’s career, their work-life balance may be lacking or non-existent, and they may have difficulty connecting with friends on their off days. 

Making friends at work may be one way to counter loneliness and improve productivity. Below are several potential benefits to having work friends. 

Collaboration and support

Harvard Business Review reports that more than 300 million people worldwide have no friends. Making genuine friends at work can allow colleagues to encourage each other, collaborate on projects, and support each other in making positive changes in the workplace. When coworkers are not socially connected, they may have a higher risk of conflict and difficulty working together and problem-solving as a team. Friendships at work can bring joy, emotional support, and the knowledge that everyone is supported, cared for, and included. 

A sense of belonging

Perceiving oneself as an outcast or being ignored by a group can lead to depression, loneliness, and anxiety at work. When coworkers get to know and accept each other, the entire workplace can see each other as worthy of connection and collaboration. Social belonging and support can also lead to improved mental health, which may reduce one’s chances of having to take time off work for health concerns. 

A healthy work environment

Workers who experience a sense of positivity and joyfulness at work may encourage a more optimistic and welcoming environment. Coming into work each day with the excitement of seeing a friend can also make the day seem to go by faster, as you may enjoy your shift more and take on less pressure by working together as a team. 

Productivity 

How to make a work friend without being unprofessional

Making friends at work can have positive effects. Below are a few tips for effectively making friends with your coworkers. 

Be open to teamwork

At work, be open to joining a team, encouraging others to work together, and asking if you can offer your input. Speak up when you have an idea, and praise the ideas and work ethics of others on your team. 

If your work environment usually operates on individualized work in cubicles or spaces where you’re not allowed to interact with your coworkers, consider making friends in the breakroom or after work by talking about ways you might improve work performance or learn from each other. You might make it a goal to speak to one new person a week. 

Remote and hybrid work positions can make this slightly more challenging. However, if you are in a remote work position, you might try connecting with others by chatting with coworkers online. If you have a hybrid work position in which you spend some time in the office, consider talking to coworkers you normally see online at the office and inviting them to get coffee or dinner together.

Have friendly conversations

Be friendly with coworkers by asking them work-appropriate questions. For example, when they mention minor aspects of their lives, consider prompting them to talk more about those areas. If they say they have pets, you might ask about their pets’ names and if you can see photos of them. You can then talk about your own pets or whether you’d like to have pets. 

Try to look for things you have in common with your colleagues. Smiling, maintaining a comfortable posture, and treating others with respect can help you be perceived as friendly. 

Get to know others at work events

If you’re unsure how to find the time to talk to coworkers, consider making friends at work events like dinners, get-togethers, or conferences. Talk to someone with whom you might not normally talk and discuss any connections you have at work. You might also talk to people with different positions in the company to learn about their contributions. 

Plan hangouts outside of work

Once you’ve had a few conversations with someone, consider inviting them to meet outside of work to get coffee or dinner. You might also talk about shared interests and suggest a hangout based on the defining features of those interests. For example, if the person enjoys hiking and you like paddleboarding, you might hike together to a lake. Other activities you might suggest include the following: 

• Biking
• Rock-climbing
• Going to a movie 
• Getting coffee or brunch
• Going to a conference
• Checking out local landmarks or art
• Going to a museum 
• Planning a group meetup with other coworkers 

When asking someone to spend time together outside of work, be professional by leaving the invitation open-ended. If they aren’t comfortable meeting up, you may still connect at work by having regular conversations, eating together in the breakroom, or working together to get tasks done more efficiently. 

The science behind the power of friendship 

Friendship has been studied for years as a way to improve mental and physical health. The American Psychological Association (APA) reports the following facts about friendship: 

• People with close friends are generally more likely to be satisfied with their lives.
• Friendship can significantly reduce one’s risk of depression.
• People can build friendships and experience their benefits at any age. 
• High-quality friendships can reduce anxiety across one’s lifespan.
• Friendship can reduce one’s risk of early death. 
• Having friends can lower blood pressure and reduce heart reactivity. 
• Friends typically experience similar brain activity related to motivation, reward, identity, and sensory processing, which may improve work performance. 
• Friendship usually reduces loneliness, which is associated with many health risks.

Support options

It can sometimes be challenging to make friends, and workplace environments may make it difficult to connect with colleagues. Many may be afraid to potentially cross boundaries or embarrass themselves. If this is the case for you, you might benefit from talking to a counselor about cultivating connection and reducing loneliness at work.

If you have a busy schedule or struggle to afford a therapist in your area, you might consider online therapy through a platform like BetterHelp. An online therapist can guide you in making friends via phone, video, or live chat sessions. In addition, you can access resources like weekly group sessions, which may be a helpful way to make friends and reduce isolation from home. 

Studies show that online therapy can reduce employee burnout, a common challenge in the workplace that may lead to difficulty making friends. In a 2022 study, healthcare workers found that online therapy helped them cope with burnout and reduce the risk of depression.