What To Do If Someone Is Having A Mental Breakdown

While the phrase “mental breakdown” isn’t a clinical term, it is often used colloquially to refer to a mental health crisis that leaves a person unable to function as they typically would. If you suspect that someone is having a mental health breakdown, it can be challenging to know what to say and do. Mental health challenges can happen to anyone, and they can take many forms. During a mental health crisis, people may engage in self-harm, get in trouble with the law, misuse alcohol or illegal substances, or consider harming themselves or others. 

No matter what kind of crisis someone is having, there may be ways to help. Offering empathy and compassion is often beneficial, but in some cases, it may be necessary to contact emergency services. While being part of a person’s support system can be rewarding, it can also be vital to take care of your own well-being. Working with a therapist may help you manage any challenges or concerns you may be experiencing.

Supporting others can take a toll on your mental health

Care for your well-being in online therapy

Signs of a mental health crisis

The warning signs and symptoms of a mental health crisis can vary depending on what is causing the breakdown and whether the person has a mental illness. Here are signs that may indicate someone is experiencing a mental health challenge:

Withdrawal-related symptoms

• Frequently missing work 
• Missing social events
• Skipping appointments
• Not wanting to leave home or be with other people
• Having trouble relating to people

Depression-related symptoms

• Exhibiting impaired lifestyle habits, like not getting enough sleep, eating more or less than usual, or displaying poor hygiene
• Losing interest in hobbies or activities they once enjoyed
• Feeling helpless, hopeless, or sad
• Feeling irritated or frustrated
• Having difficulty concentrating
• Having thoughts of suicide or self-harm
• Experiencing significant mood swings
• Being unable to carry out daily tasks

Anxiety-related symptoms

• Feeling scared or uneasy
• Having nightmares
• Being unable to stay calm
• Experiencing panic attacks
• Experiencing paranoia
• Experiencing hallucinations
• Having difficulty perceiving reality
• Experiencing flashbacks

Physical symptoms

• Feeling nauseous
• Having heart palpitations
• Having cold or sweaty hands
• Experiencing dizziness
• Shaking or trembling
• Having difficulty breathing 
• Feeling tired or having low energy

How you can help in the moment

If you are present when someone is having a mental breakdown, clear communication can be crucial. It can be important to show the individual that they are heard and understood, so give them your full attention. Face them and make eye contact so they know you are listening. Let them talk about how they feel and ask questions to clarify. It is okay to ask them if they are thinking about suicide or hurting themselves.

Use a non-judgmental, empathetic tone. Let them know that what is happening is not their fault and that you are there to help. 

In some cases, you may be able to de-escalate the situation, but this may not always be possible. In any case, reaching out for additional help may be beneficial. Caring for someone who is having a mental breakdown can be very challenging. Acting as a caretaker can take a toll on your own mental health, and you don’t have to manage the situation alone.

What to do if someone needs immediate help

If you sense that you need immediate help and must call emergency services, consider doing the following:

• Tell the operator that the individual seems to be having a mental health crisis and ask for an officer who is trained in crisis intervention. 
• Give them as much information as possible, including the individual’s symptoms and whether the person has a diagnosed mental health condition.
• If you are afraid the individual might purposely escalate the situation and provoke an officer, tell the operator this is a concern.

There are many organizations and groups you can also call for help, even if you’ve already called emergency services. Having a trained crisis counselor or local social services on the scene can help ensure the situation doesn’t escalate. 

When does a mental breakdown happen?

A mental breakdown can happen anywhere, and the person in crisis may not be someone that you know. In this case, you can still do some things to support them. 

If you are not in danger, stay calm. Ask them if they need anything that might help. You can offer them a drink of water, help them find a quieter space, or ask them if there is anyone they want you to call for them. Listen to what they are saying and try to empathize without offering advice on fixing the situation. If you feel unsafe or are in immediate danger, do not stay in the same space with the person and call emergency services for help.

There are also some things you should generally avoid when helping someone who is having a mental breakdown. 

• Don’t try to minimize their problems, give advice, or argue with them. These things can create distance and upset them further. Instead, offer a supportive, empathetic ear. 
• Don’t blame them or try to make them feel bad. Just because someone is coping with things in a way that you may not relate to or approve of doesn’t necessarily mean they are wrong. 
• Don’t tell them to snap out of it. What they are experiencing is likely very real to them, and recovering from the situation can be very difficult. 
• Don’t tell them that things could be worse. Doing so can make it seem like you are minimizing their problems.
• Don’t tell them all the reasons they should be happy. It doesn’t matter how many “good” things someone has in their life. Sometimes, these things can mask other problems, and mental health concerns can occur regardless of whether a person’s life has positive aspects.

How you can continue to support them

When the crisis resolves, the person may need additional support in their daily life. If you are acting as part of a support system for someone with a mental illness, here are some things you can do to give them the help they deserve while also prioritizing your own well-being. 

Set reasonable expectations 

Ensuring your loved one knows what you expect of them can help you avoid overextending yourself or having to provide high levels of support indefinitely. It is okay to tell them that you are there for them but that you encourage treatment and ask them to find a therapist or other mental health professionals to guide them through the recovery process. 

Have a plan if someone experiences a mental health crisis

If someone experiences a mental health crisis, it can be beneficial to establish a network of people who can help and come up with a plan in case things escalate again. For example, you might make a list with contact information for their therapist or psychiatrist, family members, friends, and mental health services who can offer emotional support. You can also have a list of resources ready for local crisis phone lines, support groups, and walk-in crisis centers. It can be helpful to sit down with the person and create a list of their triggers and the things that have helped them de-escalate a crisis in the past. 

Be clear about your boundaries & avoid stress as much as you can

You are allowed to have and enforce boundaries, even if you are someone’s primary support person. Caring for someone with mental health struggles can be challenging, and knowing your limits and respecting your own feelings can prevent you from taking on too much and putting your own mental health at risk. 

You might consider telling them that you prefer communicating via text message and that you will only respond at certain times during the day. For example, you can say something like, “I prefer that you text me, so please don’t call or leave voicemails. If I am at work, I will get back to you when I am on my lunch break or when I get home at the end of the day. Is there a supportive family member you can contact when I am unavailable?”

Set limits on what you can do to avoid a nervous breakdown

You may also choose to set limits about what you are willing to do to help. For example, you might say, “I cannot come over in the evenings after work, but I am happy to talk to you on the phone or make a plan to get together on the weekend.”

It may also be helpful to tell them about behavior thatis likely to lead to your need to distance yourself by saying something like, “I want to help you, but I will not talk to you if you are not sober, yelling at me, or threatening me. Please have a plan for who you will reach out to if that happens.”

Supporting others can take a toll on your mental health

Care for your well-being in online therapy

Don’t forget about your own mental & emotional health

Acting as part of a support system for friends and family with mental health struggles can take a toll on your own mental health. It can be better to step back and take a break occasionally before you develop burnout or resentment toward the person. 

Talk to a therapist about having a mental breakdown

If you’re having trouble managing your mental health while supporting someone who is experiencing a mental health crisis, talking to a therapist can help. If you plan to seek treatment, an online platform like BetterHelp can be a convenient way to access mental health care. When you sign up with BetterHelp, you can attend therapy sessions from the comfort of your home at a time that works for your schedule. Plus, you can change providers at any time for no additional charge until you find the right one for you. 

In addition to being flexible and accessible, research shows that online therapy can be effective. One review of 14 studies found that online cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) typically led to a 50% improvement in symptoms of several mental health conditions, including anxiety and depression, and significantly decreased the impact of stress.