Finding Love At Any Age: Senior Dating Sites
Online dating may be more common in younger adults, but around 13% of people 65 and older have reported using a dating website or app. With new dating sites and niche apps making online dating more accessible for seniors, those in this age group may now have safe and convenient ways to connect with people in their generation who are looking for companionship, casual dating, or long-term relationships. However, dating can come with challenges at any age, and older adults may find it helpful to consult a licensed therapist for guidance if they encounter difficulties.
Features of dating apps
The specific features may vary depending on the app, but here are some things seniors logging into dating apps for the first time can expect.
Dating profile creation
A user profile is generally how people on dating apps introduce themselves to others. Profiles usually include photos and bios that can feature information about a person’s interests, hobbies, dreams, and desires for a relationship. User profiles should be authentic, honest, and interesting to draw attention and make a good first impression.
User verification
About half of people using dating apps report meeting someone they believed was trying to scam them, which can emphasize why user verification can be vital. User verification generally requires someone to verify their identity by supplying a photo ID, social media links, or a phone number to ensure they are who they say they are.
Search filters
Filters can help users weed out anyone who doesn’t fit their specified parameters. Generally, these can include age, location, gender, religion, education, and interests, as well as whether they are interested in same-sex matches. Dating sites can use these filters to find potentially compatible matches.
Video chat
Many dating apps and websites started to integrate video chat during the COVID-19 pandemic, when meeting in person became challenging or impossible due to social distancing and lockdowns. Video chatting through a dating app can be an effective way to get to know someone without giving out personal information, like your email address or phone number.
How dating app use differs between older and younger adults
More than half of people who use dating apps are under 30. Because of this, older individuals may believe that these apps are designed for a different demographic, but anyone can use them to meet new people.
Comparing what younger and older adults include in their dating profiles can be helpful. One study looked at various aspects of dating profiles of younger and older users. Researchers created word clouds of the most common words used in dating profiles. After removing the 20 most common words, those that appeared most often in the profiles of the youngest users were “get,” “go,” and “work.” For the oldest users, they were “travel,” “great,” and “relationship.”
While older age tended to be associated with the use of more first-person plural pronouns, friends, health, and positive emotions, younger age was usually associated with first-person singular pronouns, work, achievement, and negative emotions.
This research also found that older adults were typically more likely to mention health, indicating that health may be of greater importance to their identities. They also appeared to be more likely to mention money, perhaps because they hoped to avoid relationships that could result in financial strain, or because they didn’t want to lose their financial independence after working for most of their lives.
These may seem like fine distinctions, but researchers speculate that these and other differences can reveal how younger and older people approach dating and finding a partner. Younger users may focus on work and achievement as they may still be trying to establish themselves, achieve personal goals, and reach a certain status. In contrast, older users' word choices may indicate that they are more in tune with the needs of others and may be more comfortable with where they are in life.
By taking control of their dating profiles, seniors can use dating apps to find the types of relationships that meet their needs and preferences.
Best dating sites for seniors
Seniors are welcome on any dating app, and filters and other search functions can make it easy to control with whom they are matched. However, there are options aimed specifically at seniors that generally cater to those over 50, including the following best dating apps for seniors:
- Silver Singles: A dating site for 50+ singles
- Date My Age: A site for mature singles who are young at heart
- OurTime: A dating site for like-minded singles over 50
- SeniorMatch: A premium senior dating community for mature singles
- Singles50: A site to create special moments together for those who are 50+
- Just Senior Singles: A dating site for single seniors
Some of these apps require subscriptions, but there are often free versions available.
Pros and cons of online dating
Dating apps can come with benefits and drawbacks. Here are some things to consider before jumping into online dating.
Benefits
Online dating can give seniors the opportunity to meet new people. Social circles tend to shrink later in life for a variety of reasons, and there may be few chances to meet new people. While younger adults may meet people at bars, clubs, university classes, or work, seniors may not always have these opportunities. Online dating can be a chance for them to meet someone outside their immediate social circle to whom they otherwise would not have been introduced.
Online dating can also offer a sense of control that people may not have when meeting someone in person. Initially, communication usually takes place via the app or dating site, which can provide a way to get to know someone before agreeing to meet them in person and without giving them a phone number or email address. Users normally have control over how much information they reveal and when they are comfortable moving communication off the platform.
Drawbacks
Although many dating sites require user verification, it can still be possible for people to misrepresent themselves, either to appear more attractive to potential dating partners or to try to scam them.
It can also be easy to harass people online. Matches can send sexual messages, explicit images, or other threatening or unwanted messages that can be upsetting or frightening for some individuals.
Dating tips: How to stay safe
Online dating may come with risks, but there are some things anyone using these apps can do to make their experience a little safer.
Be careful with personal information
Try to avoid revealing personal details, like your address, phone number, or place of employment. You should also be wary of accidentally revealing this information. For example, if you use the same photo for both your Facebook or LinkedIn profile and a dating app, someone can use a reverse image search tool to find your other social media profiles and learn things about you that you weren’t ready to reveal.
Block and report anyone suspicious
If you sense that a profile is suspicious, or if another user behaves inappropriately toward you, block and report them. Trust your instincts. If someone asks for money due to a personal crisis, gives vague answers to specific questions, or pressures you to give them your phone number or meet in person, blocking them can help you avoid dangerous or uncomfortable situations.
Be cautious when meeting in person
It can be best to video chat with someone before you meet them in person to ensure they match their profile. Make sure at least one friend knows where you’re going and what time you’re going to meet, and send them a screenshot of your date’s profile, so they know who you are meeting. Ask your friend to call or text you a few times during the date to make sure you’re okay, and check in with them when you get home to let them know you are safe.
Meet your date in a public place, and do not rely on them for transportation. That way, if you are uncomfortable, you can leave. Do not get into a car with someone you don’t know very well. Stick to places where you are comfortable, and try to avoid drinking too much or using substances so you can remain clear-headed. If you are out with someone and something seems off or you feel uncomfortable, leave as soon as you can, block their profile or phone number, and report them if needed.
Should you try a dating app?
Whether you should try a dating app usually depends on how comfortable you are with the idea and what you are looking for in a relationship.
Surveys suggest that around 7% of people aged 50 to 64 and 4% of people over 65 met their partners online, compared to 20% of those aged 18 to 29, indicating that seniors who use online dating services may have less success than young adults. This may be because not as many people in this age group sign up for dating apps. Still, online dating can help older adults connect with individuals they otherwise wouldn’t have gotten the chance to meet.
Get help navigating dating and relationships
Dating as a senior can come with many challenges, whether or not you use an online dating platform. Working with a therapist can help you determine what you’re looking for in a relationship and navigate any complications that arise.
Meeting with a counselor in person may not always be practical for older adults facing barriers like transportation challenges or mobility issues. Online therapy with a platform like BetterHelp can be a convenient and flexible way to connect with a mental health professional from the comfort of home or anywhere you have a reliable internet connection. Most people are matched with a provider within 48 hours of signing up, and you can switch therapists at any time.
Research has found that online therapy can be effective for addressing a variety of mental health challenges. According to a 2022 study, online and in-person therapy tend to produce the same client outcomes.
Takeaway
Online dating can be an effective way for seniors to meet new people and establish relationships. Seniors can sign up for any dating app or site, but some are designed specifically for older users. If you need help navigating the online dating experience or other challenges of dating as an older adult, talking to a therapist online or in person can be helpful.
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