Building A Supportive Family Environment For Better Mental Health

Regardless of structure or circumstance, our families usually lay the foundation for our well-being for the rest of our lives. Family often shapes how we handle challenges, build relationships, and establish our ethical principles. Research has repeatedly shown that the family environment tends to be the most influential factor in shaping self-esteem, playing a critical role in mental health.

Every family is unique; therefore, every family’s priorities for what makes a strong, secure, and loving home environment may differ. 

A strong family unit might also seek professional help through therapy during challenging seasons of life.

Strong families nurture strong individuals

Cultivate better familial relationships in therapy

Maintain open communication 

Open communication is often defined as the ability to express thoughts, ideas, and feelings freely and honestly. It can be an integral part of success at work and school, as well as in everyday interactions, social situations, intimate relationships, and the home. Effective, open communication can be crucial for conflict resolution and building trust, connection, and confidence. 

Open communication usually requires the following:

Availability

In busy families, it can be challenging to find opportunities to communicate. It might help to hold official family meetings or utilize the time you have during everyday activities like while you’re traveling in the car, doing the dishes after dinner, or walking the dog.

Active listening

Active listening is generally more than simply “hearing” what someone says to you. It can refer to taking the time to process and understand the message without interruption and prediction. During the conversation, individuals practicing active listening may allow the other person to finish their thoughts (without formulating a response in the middle of the conversation) and verify that they understand the other person’s point before responding.  

Openness

Some individuals may be uncomfortable asking for more information or elaboration during difficult conversations. Let your family know you’re open to questions, even if they might be upsetting, and you’ll answer them as best you can. 

Security and reassurance

During any conversation, it can be important to give the other person confidence to speak their mind without retaliation or being “shut down.” It might help to let them know from the beginning that you are there to communicate, not argue.

Personal space

If you or the person with whom you’re communicating are overwhelmed, or if you think it isn’t productive to continue, put the conversation on pause and continue it when there is less tension. 

Set clear boundaries and expectations

Boundaries tend to be vital for creating a stable, predictable environment for all family members. They can encourage the family to practice empathy and see things from each other’s perspectives. They can also be essential for teaching children how to stay safe and out of trouble in the outside world.  

When setting rules and boundaries in the home, it may help to take a moment and consider why they’re important to you. Not only may this help you clarify to your family why the rules are essential, but it can also serve as an affirmation for yourself. 

In general, boundaries and their consequences should be clear, enforced, and consistent. If you know you’ll be met with resistance, think about how you’ll respond and manage others’ reactions. Remain confident and firm but provide space for communication if they want to talk about it. 

It can also be important to remember that boundaries and consequences are not the same as threats and punishment. Setting clear boundaries with compassion and confidence can teach the younger family members how to set their own healthy boundaries as they mature. 

Share responsibilities

Sharing household responsibilities can lighten the load for everyone, impart a sense of commitment and duty, and prevent feelings of resentment when one member of the household believes they’re unfairly shouldered with most of the unpleasant chores in the house. 

To share responsibilities fairly and effectively, begin by listing the tasks that need to be done, estimate how long each will take, and discuss how you’ll divide them equitably. Prominently displaying a whiteboard or calendar with a chores schedule can clear up any disagreements and hold everyone accountable for their share. 

As time goes on, you’ll likely need to revise your list to accommodate changing schedules, responsibilities, and abilities. 

Share meals

Multiple studies highlight the importance of sharing family meals, particularly dinner, for maintaining strong connections and familial well-being. This decades-long body of research indicates:

• The frequency of family meals in adolescence may be directly linked to the likelihood of obesity in adulthood, and even sharing one or two meals per week can protect children from future weight struggles. 
• Regular meals together can boost children’s self-confidence, especially when children choose where they sit and help with dinnertime chores. 
• Eating together can decrease aggressive and oppositional behavior and nonaggressive delinquency later in life. 
• Eating together can boost children’s communication skills and increase overall physical and mental well-being. 
• Adolescents who eat dinner with their families might be better at coping with bullying online and at school.

Spend time doing something fun together

Whether you watch a movie together at home, spend an afternoon at the pool with family and friends, or have the grandparents over for a family game night, there are many things you can do with the family to strengthen bonds through fun and laughter. The benefits of spending family time together include those listed below:

• Increased self-esteem and confidence
• A stronger sense of self-identity and belonging
• A strong support network and relationship security
• Good communication and problem-solving skills
• A platform for sharing experiences and opinions

According to a Dutch study from the University of Amsterdam, adolescents who spent at least an hour doing joint activities with their parents each day “reported lower levels of risk behavior, less peer pressure, more peer support and more parental control, relatedness, and family support.”

Build routines and rituals

Establishing household routines generally supports better mental health and can enhance family life through shared experiences, reduce household stress, and facilitate better time management and productivity. 

Routine typically has many essential benefits for children as well:

• Better sleep habits
• Better communication and social skills
• Greater academic success
• Greater resilience during times of crisis

Family routines may become cherished, shared rituals. For example, suppose the evening routine includes preparing dinner, clearing the table, and doing the dishes. In that case, the family may eventually designate a regular night for a special dish, such as “Dad’s Friday night spaghetti” or “Sunday evening roast with the grandparents.”

Practice self-care

Each family member can benefit from dedicating time to their own self-care while encouraging each other to do the same. While the ways we practice self-care may differ with age, ability, and availability of resources, the core purpose may remain the same— preventing burnout and coping with stress in daily life by caring for our physical, emotional, mental, spiritual, and social well-being. 

Stay physically active

Whether you take an evening stroll after dinner, participate in an exercise class, or play a sport, we can keep our bodies active and moving in many ways. However, finding a physical activity that brings you the most satisfaction can give you greater motivation to make it a regular part of your daily life in the long run. Additionally, you can integrate physical activity into family time by finding an activity to do together that is enjoyable and suitable for all fitness levels.

Eat well

Stock your refrigerator and pantry with nutritious foods and snacks, keep fresh fruits and vegetables accessible to “grab and go” when running on a tight schedule, and prepare well-balanced meals. 

Sleep well

Sleep usually plays a critical role in human beings’ overall health and function. The Sleep Foundation recommends the following: 

• Adults 18 and older should aim for seven or more hours per night.
• Teens 13 to 18 should get eight to 10 hours.
• School-aged children six to 12 years need nine to 12 hours each night.
• Preschoolers who are three to five years old need 10 to 13 hours, including nap times.
• Toddlers who are one to two years old need 11 to 14 hours total.
• Infants of four to 12 months should get 12 to 16 total hours of sleep each day. 

To improve sleep quality, wake up and fall asleep at the same time each day and establish a regular sleep hygiene routine. 

Incorporate mindfulness into daily activities

Mindfulness meditation and exercises like yoga and tai chi can be excellent practices for staying balanced, centered, and mindful. However, they may not be viable options for everyone. In such cases, you can find mindfulness opportunities in everyday activities, such as doing chores, driving, personal grooming activities, and anytime you can take a moment for heightened awareness of your surroundings. Any activity can be done mindfully as long as you stay aware of your breath and take your time. 

For example, while folding laundry, don’t rush and notice how each piece of clothing looks, feels, and smells as you fold it. When brushing your hair, slow down and feel the brush against your scalp. Does your hair smell like your hair-care products? What color is it? 

You can teach the younger members of the family mindfulness, too. When doing dishes after dinner, encourage your child to really feel the temperature of the water. Ask them to notice what the dish soap smells like. What does it sound like when you stack the dishes and put them away?

Keep up with checkups and healthcare routines

Part of self-care can include ensuring every family member attends regular healthcare checkups like annual physicals, twice-yearly dentist visits, and other appointments to monitor physical health. Remember that caring for your family’s mental health can be just as crucial as their physical health. Families may benefit from regular individual or family therapy sessions to maintain mental well-being.

Seeking support

Online therapy can provide individuals with the tools and support to manage many of the challenges they face in daily life. Virtual therapy can be a flexible, convenient alternative to conventional treatment for families with busy schedules for whom commuting to and attending regular sessions in an office might not be viable. Online therapy platforms typically eliminate geographical barriers, offering a more comprehensive selection of mental health professionals experienced in addressing individual and familial issues. 

A large body of evidence suggests that online and in-person therapy are equally effective. Both options can treat a wide variety of mental health disorders and challenges.