How To Find The Right Mental Health Resources For Blended Families

Managing a blended family may be difficult for everyone involved. Parents or caregivers may find themselves struggling to create consistent rules and encourage stepsiblings to get along, while children may have trouble adjusting to new family dynamics and expectations. As a result, clear communication and teamwork may help blended families ensure everyone is on the same page.

In some cases, blended family challenges may affect mental health and well-being. Various mental health resources are available to offer support to manage these challenges. In addition, professional help from therapists or counselors may provide guidance and skills to improve relationships and strengthen family bonds. 

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What are blended families?

Some blended families may have only one or two children, whereas others may blend several children in one household, which can lead to more complex dynamics and potential challenges in communication and organization of the new family dynamic. Key features of blended families may include the following: 

• Merging households: Two families blend their lives, including their homes, routines, and family traditions.
• Step-parenting roles: Adults may act as stepparents to their partner's biological children.
• Shared responsibilities: Household tasks like chores, discipline, and managing finances may be shared among family members.

A blended family may take time to adjust to new dynamics in family life. Over time, families can work on defining roles and building positive relationships between biological children and stepparents. Still, blending families is an ongoing process that often requires patience, empathy, and consistent effort from everyone in the family. 

Challenges blended families may face

Blended families may encounter various challenges. These difficulties can affect relationships among family members and potentially impact mental well-being.

Parental conflicts

Parental conflicts can be a common challenge in blended families. Disagreements can occur when two people with different parenting styles and backgrounds come together. These conflicts might revolve around decision-making, child-rearing methods, or financial matters, among other topics.

For instance, one parent might believe in a more lenient approach, while the other prefers strict rules. Differences in how parents manage the household may lead to tension and confusion, especially for the children. In addition, arguments over dividing household duties may add stress and strain family relationships.

Financial stress

Financial stress may complicate family dynamics. Managing budgets and finances when two households merge can be challenging. For example, both partners may have debts or financial responsibilities from previous relationships or living situations. In addition, the added costs of raising additional children can strain finances, particularly if one spouse is overwhelmed. This financial stress can lead to arguments, potentially further complicating the already challenging process of blending families.

Communication breakdowns

Blended families may experience communication breakdowns. When family members don't communicate their feelings and boundaries effectively, misunderstandings can arise. This lack of clear communication may result in unresolved conflicts and build resentment within the family.

For example, stepchildren may hesitate to share their concerns with a stepparent, which may isolate them and keep them from building trust. Similarly, a parent might find it challenging to resolve conflicts, making the situation worse. Improving communication skills and considering therapy may help families manage these problems.

Adjusting to new family dynamics

Adjusting to new family dynamics can be a major challenge for blended families. Children and adults may benefit from an adjustment period to a new living situation, routine, and relationship. Children, particularly stepkids, may struggle with loyalty conflicts between their biological parents and new stepparents. Contrarily, adults might find it challenging to balance their co-parenting responsibilities with maintaining their relationship with their spouse. This balancing act may lead to additional stress and worry within the household.

Different disciplinary styles

Different disciplinary styles between biological parents and stepparents may lead to conflict. Stepparents may have different ways of disciplining their stepchildren, which may clash with the children's existing routines and rules.

For instance, different approaches to mealtime rules, such as one parent focusing on certain foods and strict meal schedules while the other parent allows more freedom and flexibility in food choices, can create confusion and tension within the family. These contrasting attitudes may cause conflicts among family members, potentially leading to behavioral challenges and strained relationships.

Problems with ex-partners

Problems with ex-partners may also cause challenges for blended families. Co-parenting with an ex-spouse may require coordination and cooperation. Disagreements over visitation schedules, parenting choices, and financial responsibilities can cause friction. For instance, an uncooperative or hostile ex-partner can create tension that affects the entire blended family. This tension can manifest in arguments and potential legal disputes, making it more difficult for the new family unit to develop strong relationships.

Mental health resources for blended families

Mental health resources may help blended families manage their unique dynamics. Therapy platforms, local support groups, and specialized centers may offer assistance. 

Therapy and counseling

Therapy and counseling may support blended families in managing emotional and relational challenges. Therapists can work with individuals or the whole family to improve communication and resolve conflicts. Some therapists specialize in family dynamics, allowing them to focus uniquely on blended family problems. Individuals and families may find a therapist via referrals, online directories, a search tool, a doctor’s referral, or local mental health organizations.

Local support groups

Local support groups may bring together families facing similar challenges. These groups provide a platform to share experiences, advice, and emotional support. Meeting regularly, these groups may help members better understand their struggles. Local support groups can be found through community centers, online searches, or local mental health organizations. Participating in these groups may offer you practical tips and coping skills from those with first-hand experience.

National Stepfamily Resource Center

The National Stepfamily Resource Center may be a helpful resource for blended families. Their programs and workshops, like Smart Steps, reinforce family strengths and work on specific challenges. These sessions involve adults and children, creating a holistic approach to family bonding.

The center offers various materials for continuous learning and support, including articles, books, and online resources. By providing evidence-based strategies, they help families with common problems, such as role confusion and boundary setting. Accessing these resources may improve family dynamics and strengthen relationships.

Alternative support options 

In some cases, accessing in-person therapy may be difficult for an individual due to a busy schedule or family challenges. In these cases, online therapy through a platform like BetterHelp for individuals or Regain for couples may be more accessible.

Online platforms can match families with licensed therapists after they fill out a brief questionnaire to sign up. In addition, individuals can choose between phone, video, or live chat sessions and choose a session time that best fits their schedule, including outside of standard business hours. 

Individuals in blended families may experience increased stress, anxiety, or depression due to the complexities often involved in these dynamics. Research suggests that online therapy can be as effective as in-person therapy for treating conditions like depression.