Mental Health Tips For New Parents: Balancing A Baby And Self-Care
The days, weeks, and months after a new baby arrives can be an exciting and challenging time for new parents. For both biological and adoptive parents, the addition of a baby to the household may mean making several changes to your daily lifestyle and experiencing conflicting emotions. As a new parent, practicing self-care and managing your well-being can replenish your physical and mental resources and may allow you to be a more effective parent.
There can be many ways to practice self-care. Some can be done on your own, and some may require professional support and guidance. By developing strategies that promote flexible thinking and self-compassion, you can find a balance between doing what is best for your growing family and taking care of yourself. If in-person therapy sessions aren’t feasible as you adjust to this new stage of life, consider connecting with a therapist online for more convenient support.
What is self-care, and why is it important?
For some, “self-care” may sound like a trendy buzzword. However, self-care practices can reduce stress and anxiety and improve your overall well-being. Self-care may look different for different people, but broadly speaking, it refers to a collection of actions a person takes to care for themselves holistically. Some common self-care practices include mindfulness, exercise, nutritious eating habits, and relaxation activities.
New parents may view self-care as a type of selfish behavior. However, practicing self-care strategies can improve both mental and physical health while reducing illness and shortening its duration. This means that, although self-care may focus on the parent, it usually enables them to take better care of their child.
Common mental health challenges for new parents
As a new parent, you may experience a wide variety of mental health challenges. These conditions may arise within days or weeks of childbirth and can impact a parent’s daily life. Some common mental health challenges for new parents include the following:
Postpartum depression (PPD)
Serious depression symptoms that extend after childbirth may indicate postpartum depression. Individuals with PPD may experience depression symptoms, such as a low mood, loss of interest or pleasure, and loss of appetite. These symptoms may impact daily life and last beyond the “baby blues” that can be common in the first few weeks after childbirth.
Insomnia and sleep deprivation
New parents tend to have an increased risk of insomnia or sleep deprivation. A newborn baby may wake frequently throughout the night for a variety of reasons, which may make it challenging to get enough sleep. Added stress and anxiety may also make it hard to fall back to sleep after waking to feed the baby or change their diaper.
Mood swings
Parenting can be filled with highs and lows. A new parent may experience wide mood swings that include moments of happiness or elation followed by moments of sadness.
Anxiety and stress
The sudden responsibility of being a parent can be a source of stress and anxiety. There may be anxiety about what other parents think, and new parents may worry about whether they are providing their baby with everything they need.
Mental health tips for new parents
By practicing self-care, seeking support from a family member or friend, and enlisting help from a mental health professional, you may be able to reduce the impact of these challenges.
Practical self-care tips for new parents
Self-care can be an essential part of maintaining mental and physical health for new parents. By implementing a variety of strategies, you can find a few that work for you and smooth the transition to parenthood. Below are several practical self-care tips to improve mental health and overall happiness as new parents:
Establish a support system
As the saying goes, it often takes a village to raise a child. With this in mind, it may be beneficial to seek support and help from family and friends. This could mean asking for some help around the house or having a trusted loved one babysit while you get a few hours of sleep. You may also seek support or advice from other parents who have experience raising children.
Finding professional support, such as working with a therapist or postpartum doula, may be a way to build your support network. You may also find social support by joining a new parent support group. These groups can be a validating way for new parents to both give and receive advice while bonding over the shared experience of raising a newborn baby.
Prioritize sleep
Although it can be challenging to get enough sleep with a newborn baby waking you up throughout the night, sleep can be an important part of self-care and good mental health. One way to get more sleep may be to sleep when the baby sleeps, which generally means taking naps during the day. It may be tempting to use the time while the baby is sleeping to catch up on work or chores around the house, but this often makes it hard to catch up on lost sleep.
During the night, it can be helpful to coordinate with a partner (if possible) to get a better night’s rest. Parents may share responsibilities like changing diapers, feeding, and soothing the baby throughout the night. It also may be helpful to practice good sleep hygiene for the moments when you are able to sleep. This generally means avoiding caffeine late in the day, avoiding screens before bed, and sleeping in a cool, dark, comfortable space.
Eat nutrient-rich foods and get exercise
Prioritizing nutritious eating habits that include fruits, vegetables, lean protein, and whole grains may help new parents maintain the energy they need to keep up with a newborn. As a new parent, it may be tempting to order fast food or pick up convenience foods, which may increase fatigue. Although it can be challenging, preparing home-cooked, balanced meals may be done by prepping ahead of time and asking family members and friends for help.
It can also be important for new parents to get regular exercise. Gentle forms of movement, like walking, yoga, and stretching, can get the body moving and improve mood. In the beginning, it may be beneficial for the focus to be on consistency rather than intensity, especially for individuals who are healing from childbirth.
Engage in mental health practices
Practicing mindfulness techniques or engaging in self-reflection can be helpful ways to take care of yourself. Meditation, journaling, or a reflective walk can calm the mind and promote relaxation. These practices can also put an individual’s stress and anxiety into perspective as the new parent takes a step away from their role as a parent and focuses on themselves.
These practices can be done individually or with a small group and may or may not involve a mental health professional. As with exercise, consistency may be key to experiencing the maximum benefits of mindfulness practices. Engaging in 15 to 20 minutes of mindfulness can be a way to set your mood and intentions for the day.
Maintain social connections
Being a new parent does not necessarily mean that you need to cut off your social life. Maintaining social connections can be an important part of self-care, and socializing is typically linked to improved mental health and well-being for all people, not just new parents. Maintaining social relationships can be an important form of support for new parents, as they can share their thoughts and emotions with friends and loved ones, reducing feelings of isolation.
Manage expectations and be kind to yourself
New parents may experience pressure to be the “perfect” parent, even though all parents tend to make mistakes. It can be beneficial for a new parent to understand that they cannot control everything when it comes to raising a child. Managing these expectations and being kind to yourself can help you maintain a more balanced, healthy perspective.
Aid for postpartum depression and other mental health concerns
Working with a therapist can be a beneficial way to balance self-care and caring for a new baby. A therapist can recognize signs of serious mental health conditions, such as postpartum depression, and provide you with strategies for improving mental health.
Online therapy
For new parents, making it into a brick-and-mortar office to attend an in-person therapy session may not be realistic or convenient. Online therapy sessions can take place from any location with an internet connection, empowering new parents to get the professional support they deserve from the comfort of their own homes.
Mental health tips for new parents: Online therapy can help
According to a 2023 study, online therapy can be an effective way to manage the mental health challenges that come with being a new parent. An online therapist may work with new parents to develop systems and structures to improve mental health while building and improving their connection with their child.
Takeaway
Do new parents need help?
Even though a new baby in the family brings so much joy to new parents, parenting also comes with stress, fatigue, and fear. For some new parents, the journey of parenthood can impact their mental health. All new parents need help and a support network to cope and adjust to the challenges of parenthood.
Why is it important for parents to know about mental health?
As a parent, by understanding and maintaining your own mental health, you can not only be a more empathetic, calm, and thoughtful person, but you can also learn how to identify and address any potential issues you may see in your child.
A parent who meets their own needs, finding time to take care of themselves through healthy self-care practices like regular exercise, hot baths, and mental breaks, and who can identify common symptoms of poor mental health, are more likely to not only support themselves in a way that makes them more effective parents, but also allows them to better understand and meet the needs of their own children’s mental health.
How does untreated mental health affect parenting?
Research shows that parents with untreated mental health issues can negatively impact their children’s mental and emotional development. When a child faces emotional distress due to family turmoil, it takes a toll. These events are called adverse childhood experiences (ACEs), and while collecting these ACEs over childhood doesn’t guarantee a problem, it does increase the risk for developing issues with emotional health or even experiencing a mental health condition like depression, anxiety, or PTSD.
How does a relationship with parents affect mental health?
Children seek reassurance from their parents in a world that they don’t yet quite understand. There ca be a big difference in how a child interacts with the world when they feel that they have a strong, safe presence from their parents.
How does strict parenting affect a child's mental health?
Strict parenting in children and teens can cause them to have negative feelings about their parents. Kids who are continually “in trouble” or who feel continually watched and judged will often start hiding their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Studies also show that teens with strict parents are more likely to rebel and engage in risky behavior.
How does permissive parenting affect mental health?
The children of permissive parents often experience issues like anxiety, depression, social isolation, and poor academic performance. They also may have more difficulty regulating their emotions, or controlling impulses.
How does mental health affect parenting capacity?
A parent with poor mental health may have difficulties in finding the energy to spend quality time with their children. In dealing with their own symptoms, they may neglect their child’s emotional needs or have issues showing a real concern for their problems. Mental health conditions can be an energy drain, and by improving their own mental health by seeking professional health, a parent can greatly increase their capacity to take on more of their child’s emotional burdens and improve their chances for better mental health in the future.
What happens to children of mentally unstable parents?
The children of mentally unstable parents are at greater risk of developing any number of cognitive, mental, or emotional problems. Many will spend their lives trying to find the security they may have been missing in childhood, suffering from disorganized or unstable attachments. This can lead to difficulty building and maintaining healthy relationships. Some may feel anxious and neglected, even into adulthood.
Why should mental health matter to you and your family?
Mental health is a family affair. Most psychiatric disorders have genetic and environmental elements, and untreated mental health issues in the parents can be in essence “passed down” to the next generation. By learning coping skills and healing trauma in your own life, you can stop the cycle of generational trauma and offer better mental health outcomes for your children.
How does a mother's mental health affect a child’s development?
It is completely normal for a mother to experience pre or post-natal anxiety or depression, but if left untreated it can become a very real concern. Early parenthood is a stressful time, and if a mother neglects her own feelings and own needs, they can feel overwhelmed in a way that can have a negative impact on the baby’s health. Studies show that significant maternal stress can have wide-ranging impacts on brain development during pregnancy and after birth, increasing risks for cognitive, behavioral, and learning problems in their child and disorders like ADHD.
Many women experience anxiety and mood changes, feeling tired from keeping up with the baby, household chores, and for many, returning to work. However, talk therapy with a mental health provider can help individuals learn to manage stress in healthy ways, and treat any underlying mental health problems. In addition, some find a lot of value in parenting groups, in which fellow parents can share experiences and talk with other moms when times feel tough.
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