Exploring Virtual Couples Therapy: Does Online Marriage Counseling Work?
If you have decided that you would like help with your relationship, one of the next questions is where to find it. You and your partner can get help in person or online, and the rise of telemedicine has made it more common and straightforward to work with a marriage counselor through videoconferencing. But does meeting with a counselor in this way actually work? Why would you get couples counseling through Skype, Zoom, or another online platform instead of attending in person?
There are a variety of reasons, but for starters, many couples may find that online marriage counseling feels more convenient than in-person sessions, since you can attend a counseling session without leaving your house. Online counseling can also open up a wider pool of potential therapists, which may increase the odds of finding one whose expertise matches your needs and who feels like a good fit. Many couples may also find that virtual therapy makes them feel more empowered and comfortable. In this article, we’ll explore the benefits and drawbacks of online couples counseling, as well as what the research has to say regarding its effectiveness.
Does online marriage counseling work?
Some people may feel skeptical about the idea of working on their relationship over a video call, and this can be understandable. After all, couples therapy is a deeply personal process, and some people may be unsure if meeting online would feel suitable for such a vulnerable process.
What research says about online marriage counseling
This kind of skepticism can be common. Research has found that different people can have very different expectations regarding online therapy—some may feel optimistic and excited about the process, while others may have reservations about their ability to connect with their therapist. These individuals may worry that the relationship would be “more impersonal”. But this study found that “many patients were surprised at the quality of the relationship they had been able to develop online”. After receiving online therapy, many of those individuals who had initial doubts found that the format of online therapy actually made it feel easier to talk openly with their therapist.
Researchers have also demonstrated the effectiveness of online couples therapy. One such study examined the efficacy of a couples therapy program conducted through videoconferencing as compared to face-to-face, and it found that the two forms of therapy delivered equivalent results.
Benefits of online couples counseling
Even if online couples counseling can be effective, why might someone choose to go this route as opposed to in-person counseling? Different people may have different preferences when it comes to therapy, but below are some potential advantages of online couples counseling to consider:
No commute required
Many people may choose virtual therapy because they’re busy enough already, and traveling to a therapist’s office once a week may be too much of an added time commitment. Online counseling allows you to attend therapy sessions wherever you have internet, including from home, so there’s no need for a commute.
When both partners need to find time in their busy schedules for counseling, the fact that there’s no additional time spent commuting can be a big advantage of online therapy. Plus, attending therapy in familiar surroundings may feel more comfortable for some people.
Geography isn’t an issue
Finding a licensed couples counselor can be a lot of work, even for couples who live in urban areas with lots of practicing mental health professionals. If you’re located in a more remote area with fewer local services, it can seem almost impossible. With online couples therapy, this barrier is removed. You can connect with a trained and certified counselor without the limitations of geography.
This can also be a useful benefit for long-distance couples, or situations in which one or both partners must travel frequently for work. Many online therapy services enable participants to connect from different locations. That means you may not have to put your relationship efforts on hold just because one of you is out of town.
Choosing the right therapist can be easier
The fact that you’re not limited to treatment providers in your area can also mean you have more choices. Online couples counseling platforms may have networks of hundreds or even thousands of licensed marriage and family therapists. This can make it much more likely that you’ll be able to find one with the right combination of education, experience, and expertise for you.
In addition, some online therapy platforms, such as BetterHelp, make it easy to switch therapists if you feel that the one you meet with initially is not the best fit. Online therapy allows you to switch therapists simply without the hassle of going back to the drawing board to find someone new on your own.
You may feel more comfortable with virtual couples therapy
We mentioned earlier that before starting therapy, some couples think online therapy will feel awkward and unnatural. In fact, research has found the opposite is often true.
This could make your relationship therapy more effective. Researchers have shown that the development of a strong therapeutic alliance can be an important factor in achieving positive outcomes from mental health treatment. If it feels easier for you to develop a rapport with your therapist through online sessions, they may be better able to help you and your partner forge a healthier relationship.
Possible drawbacks of online couples therapy
Though there can be significant advantages to online couples therapy, there can also be a few drawbacks. The first is the limitations of the technology itself. Though videoconferencing has been getting better and better, depending on the situation and the quality of technology used, your therapist still might miss some nuances of your expression, body language, and so on. Also, there’s always a chance that a session could be interrupted by connection issues or service outages, which could be frustrating. In addition, some people may not have reliable internet or a suitable device, and some may also not feel adept at using technology or digital tools.
Who may benefit more from in-person mental health care?
Certain concerns may need to be addressed through in-person care. For example, while it’s fairly straightforward to speak to a licensed marriage and family therapist online if you have a serious mental illness that requires medication, online therapy may not be sufficient. If serious mental health difficulties are playing a role in your relationship troubles, it could be a good idea to work with a doctor in person in addition to getting online help.
Starting online couples therapy or marriage counseling with a mental health professional
Many couples delay therapy for years, which can allow their marital challenges to get significantly worse in the meantime.
Starting therapy can be intimidating, so this is understandable, but if this is something you’re feeling, online therapy could help. With online therapy, you can match with and meet with a licensed therapist wherever you have an internet connection, which may feel easier for some couples.
Effectiveness of online couples counseling
Once you make the choice to start counseling, there is a strong chance it can help your relationship: research shows that couples therapy positively impacts 70% of couples receiving treatment, and as mentioned earlier, it seems to work just as well online as it does in person.
Takeaway
Can you do couples counseling online?
Yes, you can meet with a licensed therapist for couples counseling through a variety of online couples therapy services. Many married couples or partners facing relationship challenges choose online couples therapy because it’s convenient and can be just as effective as in-person couples therapy.
Whether you're seeking relationship therapy, marriage counseling, or even online premarital counseling, these services often allow you and your partner to connect with a licensed marriage and family therapist from the comfort of your own home. This option may help couples work on their relationship issues, build stronger communication skills, and begin treatment in a familiar, safe space.
Online therapy also provides a path forward for couples looking to address relationship problems, set relationship goals, or build more satisfying relationships through ongoing therapy sessions.
What are the disadvantages of online marriage counseling?
One potential drawback of online marriage counseling is that your licensed therapist might miss non-verbal cues, such as body language and facial expressions. This can sometimes affect the therapist’s ability to fully understand your relationship dynamics or emotional state during therapy sessions.
Online sessions may also not feel like a safe space for everyone, especially if you or your partner live with roommates. In these cases, in-person couples therapy might feel safer or more effective.
Some couples dealing with relationship issues, conflict, or more serious relationship concerns may benefit from individual therapy or family therapy in addition to online treatment. If you're facing serious mental health concerns or issues like domestic violence, marriage counseling online may not be the right fit.
Also, technology issues—like poor internet, audio delays, or software glitches—can interrupt couples therapy sessions, which may feel frustrating or reduce progress.
Online premarital counseling services may lack some of the personal touch and structured activities offered in-person. These components can help couples resolve relationship problems, learn communication skills, and build a stronger foundation.
However, for many married couples, the support they receive online still helps them begin treatment, practice problem-solving, and make progress toward a more satisfying relationship.
How often should couples go to marriage counseling?
The frequency of marriage or couples counseling sessions depends on the couple’s specific needs. Some married couples may find it helpful to attend therapy sessions twice a month, while others may prefer more frequent sessions.
In more urgent situations, such as ongoing conflict or serious relationship issues, more frequent sessions may be recommended.
Working with a licensed marriage and family therapist or a licensed therapist can help both you and your partner build communication skills, practice problem-solving, and begin treatment in a structured way. These sessions aim to address relationship challenges, mental health concerns, or even family dynamics that may be impacting your connection.
Couples may also turn to couples therapy services for premarital counseling, marriage therapy, or when navigating specific relationship concerns. Whether you're looking to build a stronger foundation, resolve relationship problems, or make progress toward healthy relationships, sessions can be planned around your goals, schedule, and stage of life.
Online or in a therapist's office, marriage counseling offers a safe space to grow together. Your therapist may help you set relationship goals, gain new insights, and work toward a more satisfying relationship.
If you're unsure how often to meet, a qualified marriage counselor or provider can help you determine what’s best based on your circumstances.
Do marriages survive counseling?
Marriage counseling can help couples build intimacy, improve communication, navigate difficult relationship issues, and develop healthier conflict-resolution skills. Through structured therapy sessions, couples can develop healthier ways to manage conflict and build the foundation for healthy relationships. However, the success of couples counseling depends on the couple’s willingness (both you and your partner) to work on the challenges in their relationship.
For many couples, working with a licensed therapist—or a licensed marriage and family therapist—helps create a safe, guided space to explore patterns and set relationship goals. In some cases, therapists may also recommend individual therapy, family therapy, or even premarital counseling to address deeper mental health concerns or family dynamics that affect the relationship.
If you're not sure where to start, couples therapy services can match you with a therapist who fits your needs and helps you find a path forward. Whether you're aiming to resolve relationship issues, strengthen your bond, or cultivate a loving relationship, therapy can offer the structure and support needed to make progress in your life.
Is online marriage counseling worth it?
Yes, for many couples, online marriage or couples counseling can be well worth it. It gives each partner a chance to improve communication, manage conflict, and work toward shared relationship goals.
Online couples counseling or marriage therapy can be just as effective as in-person sessions, especially when you’re working with a licensed therapist who understands your needs. Whether you're addressing communication issues, building a loving relationship, or navigating parenting issues, online therapy provides structure and support for both emotional connection and practical problem-solving.
Some services even offer features like unlimited messaging, which allow you to stay connected between therapy sessions. These tools can help both you and your partner stay on track and apply what you’ve learned to everyday life. In some cases, you might also be paired with certified Gottman therapists trained in science-backed methods for improving relationships.
Online counseling may be especially helpful for couples in multiple states or those with limited time. Many services also offer sliding-scale pricing or work with insurance providers, so it’s worth checking if your insurance plans can accept insurance coverage for these services.
Online therapy can also be a good resource for couples seeking premarital counseling, family therapy, or even individual therapy alongside couples work. Whether your goal is to begin treatment, resolve challenges, or build new skills, the flexibility of virtual counseling can help you and your partner find a shared path forward.
How to fix a broken marriage without counseling?
You can try to fix a marriage without counseling by improving how you and your partner talk, spending time together, and supporting each other in daily life.
Reading relationship advice, being patient, and listening with care can help. These small steps may lead to making progress. Working on your growing self is also important. Individual therapy can help you understand your feelings, manage stress, and bring positive change.
Some therapists are in-network, which means your insurance might cover support like individual therapy. Taking care of your emotional health and getting the right support can help you build a healthier relationship and a better life and keep making progress.
Can I trust online therapy?
Yes, online therapy is a trusted way to get help. Whether you’re looking for individual therapy or premarital counseling, licensed therapists offering online therapy sessions have the same master’s degree and training as in-person professionals.
Therapists can help you and your partner with conflict, relationship issues, and setting relationship goals. Some are trained in proven methods, such as those from the Gottman Institute, to guide couples toward a healthier connection.
Online therapy also offers helpful features like unlimited messaging and flexible scheduling. Many services accept insurance, so check with your insurance provider or look at your insurance plans to see what’s covered.
You can use online therapy to work on problem-solving or focus on growing self-awareness. It’s a safe, supportive way to make progress and build stronger communication with the support of a licensed professional.
How often should couples go to marriage counseling?
It depends on what you and your partner need. Some couples prefer weekly or bi-weekly therapy sessions, while others may go more often if they’re dealing with serious conflict or relationship struggles.
Working with a licensed therapist, whether online or in person, can help with communication and making progress. You might focus on building trust, managing daily stress, or learning to better support each other in life.
Couples may also explore premarital counseling, individual therapy, or therapy based on attachment theory to strengthen the relationship from different angles. Some providers are in-network and may be covered by most insurance plans. Many platforms offer unlimited messaging, making it easier to stay connected between sessions.
Whether you're facing day-to-day conflict or preparing for the future, the right pace of sessions can support your unique journey and encourage your growing self. Talking with a therapist who has a master’s degree in counseling can help you decide what’s best.
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