Free Lesbian Couples Counseling & Therapy For Mental Health
- For those experiencing suicidal thoughts, please contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988
- For those experiencing abuse, please contact the Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
- For those experiencing substance use, please contact SAMHSA National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357
While lesbian couples face many of the same relationship challenges heterosexual couples face, they also navigate unique challenges. For example, lesbian couples and gay couples may experience discrimination or internalized homophobia, in addition to challenges related to coming out, like family rejection. These stressors can increase the risk of developing mental health conditions, with the American Psychiatric Association reporting that LGBTQ individuals are 2.5 times more likely to experience depression, anxiety, and substance use disorder compared with heterosexual individuals.
How can I find free lesbian couples counseling?
Counseling services from LGBTQ-affirming therapists can provide an unbiased, safe space for lesbian couples to navigate their unique experience that may improve relationship satisfaction and mental health. Many local and national resources offer free short-term counseling for lesbian couples.
Why LGBT+ affirmative therapy is important
Minority stress describes stressful experiences and situations that arise due to being in a minority group in terms of sexual orientation, gender identity, race, ethnicity, or religion. Minority stress may include victimization, discrimination, stereotyping and prejudice, and systemic bias. A review of 62 studies found that level of minority stress is linked to mental health outcomes, including depression and suicidal ideation.
While research supports that LGBTQ+ couples can improve relationship satisfaction and mental health through therapy, many people are hesitant to seek out mental health services due to challenges like discrimination, stigma, and lack of cultural sensitivity.
These experiences make LGBTQ+ affirmative therapy an important resource for non-judgmental, positive therapy from professionals with education in, and awareness of, the unique challenges facing lesbian couples.
Low-cost or free lesbian couples counseling and LGBTQ+ mental health resources
Finding a qualified therapist or couples counselor who specializes in helping LGBTQ couples can be challenging, particularly in you live in a rural area where there aren’t many counselors to begin with. In addition, counseling can be expensive, often costing between $65 and $250 per hour, and most health insurance providers do not cover couple’s therapy. To help accommodate clients, some therapists may offer sessions on a sliding scale rate. Although not an alternative to therapy, there are also many free or low-cost mental health resources available online. The following are free resources that may help you improve your relationship and mental health:
1. The queer & transgender resilience workbook
This free workbook was written by Anneliese Singh, Ph.D., LPC, and it can help you learn skills for navigating sexual orientation and gender expression. The workbook includes sections on self-worth, self-affirmation, body positivity, community and relationships, resources, inspiration, and opportunities for self-growth. Many couples may find it helpful to work through and discuss this workbook together.
The Trevor Project is a national organization dedicated to providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services for LGBTQ+ youth. They offer various resources, including a free 24/7 hotline (call 1-866-488-7386), texting services (text 678-678), and an online web chat to provide support for anyone in crisis. While this may not be the same as working with a trained therapist, it can still be a valuable tool.
3. Coming out: A handbook for LGBTQ young people
Are you, or is your partner, considering coming out? The Trevor Project created this free handbook, which provides a helpful overview of gender and sexuality terms, along with advice for coming out, maintaining healthy relationships, providing self-care, and identifying signs that may indicate mental health concerns.
Have questions about setting boundaries, dating violence, what to do if your family doesn’t approve of your partner, supporting your partner through transition, how to date in the closet, or how to end an unhealthy relationship?
Love is respect addresses these questions and more on their website. Additionally, support is available from advocates trained in healthy relationships, crisis intervention, and dating abuse through phone (1-866-331-9474), chat, and text (text "LOVEIS" to 22522).
Our Relationship is an online resource offering self-help couple’s programs that you can complete on your own schedule, with coaches available to help you apply the skills you learn. Sessions are free for couples who qualify, and the program is funded by the U.S. Administration for Children and Families. This resource can offer you extensive training in making your relationship healthier.
A peer-reviewed study published in 2017 found that Our Relationship improved individual and relationship functioning. However, this study only evaluated heterosexual couples. Our Relationship may still be a useful self-help resource for lesbian couples looking to improve communication skills, overall relationship satisfaction, and coping skills. Results may vary depending on the effort put in by each partner.
PFLAG is a national organization that provides free peer-to-peer support online and in-person, in addition to online outreach, and other resources. PFLAG has chapters located across the nation. They also provide an extensive list of support hotlines that can help if you’re experiencing a crisis.
7. Relevant podcasts and books
There are many podcasts that discuss relationships and couple’s therapy, including the following that specifically focus on the LGBTQ+ community:
Gay Therapy LA: Hosted by Ken Howard, LCSW
Q Marriage Mentors: Hosted by Jeff Lutes, LPC
Self-help books specific for lesbian relationships include the following:
Ask a Queer Chick: A Guide to Sex, Love, and Life for Girls Who Dig Girl by Lindsay King-Miller
Conscious Lesbian Dating and Love: A Roadmap to Finding the Right Partner and Creating the Relationship of Your Dreams by Ruth Schwartz, Ph.D. and Michelle Murrain, Ph.D.
Lesbian Couples: A Guide to Healthy Relationships by D. Merilee Clunis, Ph.D. and G. Dorsey Green, Ph.D.
Working It Out: A Lesbian Relationship Primer by Frances S. Fuchs, Ph.D.
While these books are generally not free, most are relatively low-cost and written by licensed mental health professionals. Also, instead of buying a book, you could request that your local library obtain it through an interlibrary loan, if they don't have a copy already.
8. Local organizations that support mental health
Consider reaching out to your local LGBTQ+ community center, nonprofits, religious organizations, or support groups. They may be able to provide free short-term counseling services or offer recommendations for other local resources. You can also consider asking friends and family members if they have any recommendations for mental health professionals in your area.
Online therapy can be a cost-effective option
While crisis counseling and self-help resources can be helpful, they should not be considered a replacement for couples’ therapy from a licensed professional. If you and your partner are having trouble finding an in-person LGBTQ-affirming therapist, or if you would prefer to attend therapy sessions from the comfort of home, you may want to try online couple’s therapy.
Online platforms, like ReGain, offer couple’s therapy from licensed professionals who specialize in and have received training on providing LGBTQ+ affirmative therapy. Though ReGain is not free, the costs are typically comparable to an insurance co-pay, which can make it a more affordable option than in-person couple’s therapy.
In a 2022 study comparing online and in-person couples therapy, researchers found that online therapy effectively increased relationship satisfaction and mental health outcomes. Some people find that online therapy services tend to be more cost-effective, and they can reduce stigma and increase availability compared with in-person therapy.
Takeaway
LGBTQ+ individuals often experience minority stress, which can strain relationships and make mental health conditions more common. There are many national organizations that offer free short-term mental health resources, and there are free self-help workbooks, podcasts, and low-cost self-help books for lesbian couples available.
While these resources can be useful, they are not considered a replacement for couple’s therapy. Online LGBTQ+ affirmative couple’s therapy can effectively improve relationship satisfaction and mental health outcomes, and it’s typically more affordable and available than in-person couple’s therapy.
Can couples therapy help with cheating?
Yes. In many cases, couples therapy can help a couple recover or move on from infidelity. Couples therapy from a trained counselor who is licensed to provide counseling for couples is best.
What is queer counseling in LGBTQ mental health?
Queer counseling is a type of counseling that validates an individual's experiences as members of the LGBTQ community. It provides a safe and non-judgmental space for people to talk with licensed therapists about challenges they face, including social discrimination and inequities.
Does couples counseling actually work?
Yes. Research shows that most clients seeking couples counseling experience positive outcomes. Moreover, it may be possible to receive low cost counseling services, including affordable online therapy options. It could be more difficult to find free counseling services, but you can look into employer reimbursement or insurance reimbursement services.
Should you get couples counseling or marriage counseling?
Only you can decide whether to pursue relationship counseling in the form of couples counseling or marriage counseling. The majority of couples who do opt for this form of counseling report positive outcomes, though.
What is the success rate of couples counseling?
Some evidence suggests that over 70 percent of couples who seek counseling experience success in the form of stronger relationships or marriages.
How to fix a broken relationship?
There may be several ways to fix a broken relationship, including communication exercises, spending more quality time together, and attending couples therapy. In some cases, individuals may need to seek therapy for mental health care before the relationship can be improved.
When can you tell a relationship is over?
There could be many indicators that a relationship is over, including a breakdown in communication, frequent fighting, or feeling detached from your partner. A couples therapist can help you determine when it is time to end the relationship or if it’s worth saving.
What are the stages of a broken relationship?
Everyone processes the end of a relationship differently, but you may go through different stages, similar to a person who is grieving. These stages might not be linear, but they could include denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance, for example.
How do you know if your relationship is beyond repair?
There may be numerous signs that a relationship is coming to an end, and they may vary for different couples. Some signs might include a feeling of disconnection, lack of intimacy, an escalation in fighting, frequent ups and downs, and a breakdown of trust in the relationship.
What is stonewalling in a relationship?
Stonewalling in a relationship occurs when one or both partners disconnects from a conversation and stops communicating. Stonewalling can be detrimental to the relationship and may or may not be intentional.
- Previous Article
- Next Article