Mental Health During The Holidays: Reduce Stress And Prioritize Wellness
People worldwide often look forward to the holiday season, but many stressors can arise due to anticipation, work deadlines, busy stores, and weather changes. For some, holiday stress can seem insurmountable. Below, we’ll discuss how to take care of your mental health during the holidays and find methods for taking a breather when you become stressed.
Holiday mental health: Understanding holiday stress
Ellen Braaten, PhD, an associate professor of psychology at Massachusetts General Hospital, notes how the holidays can be filled with a mixture of joy and stress for many people. In the United States, the commercial holiday season is heaviest around November and December, as Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Christmas, and New Year’s Eve occur around the same time. Stores are generally busier, people are typically rushed for time, and families often travel to see each other in various places. As many people get work off for the holidays, more people may be out and about, crowding up local areas and tourist destinations. This increase in activity and pressure can be stressful for people, especially when mixed in with factors like family traumas, burnout, conflict, loneliness, or mental health conditions.
The holidays also typically require individuals to pay attention to more details than usual, which can overload the brain’s memory storage capacity. Planning presents, holiday parties, time off, and travel can be challenging, and if any details are left out or forgotten, extra stress can arise due to disappointment. Having ways to regulate your emotions can be helpful during these months, especially if your daily routine is out of flux.
Are mental health conditions more likely over the holidays?
Symptoms of depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and other mental health conditions can be significantly exacerbated by stress. However, this factor doesn’t necessarily mean that everyone with a mental illness always has difficulty over the holidays. Some people may experience situational depression or sadness over the holidays, commonly referred to as “the holiday blues.” Having coping techniques on hand before the season starts can be a helpful way to prepare for any event.
Ways to prioritize mental health during the holidays
You can set yourself up for success during the holiday season by considering the following ways to take a breather. Even if you don’t feel stressed, anxious, or depressed, these tips may help you prevent stress from occurring.
Set healthy boundaries and plan ahead
Friends, family members, and loved ones can be a significant source of stress over the holidays if you’re having a get-together, family dinner, or party. Setting realistic expectations and boundaries on your time, money, energy, house, relationships, and belongings can help you ensure you don’t overextend yourself to please others and still have a wonderful time.
For example, if you know you won’t be able to handle extensive holiday gatherings, you might let your family know you won’t be attending family gatherings or will only be there for a few hours. If it helps you to have more control over the festivities, you might consider hosting the family gathering at your own house and having a set time when everyone leaves. Below are other areas of life where you can set boundaries and limits:
- A maximum amount of money you’d prefer people to spend on gift-giving (or whether you want gifts at all)
- How often you’re able to run errands for others
- Whether you will attend an event with alcohol present
- Whether you want children at an event you’re hosting
- A family member you’re uncomfortable spending time with
- The topics you’re comfortable discussing with others
- Whether you’re open to compromises
- Whether you will participate in religious rituals, ceremonies, services, or events
- How long you’re able to spend time at an event
- What you’re comfortable helping with in case of emergencies
Spend time in nature
Nature can have a calming effect, and studies show that being in nature can improve mental health and well-being over time. Consider spending time in a park, hiking, swimming in a hot spring, or sitting in your backyard. If it snows where you live, you might build snowmen with your children, go sledding, or engage in winter sports like skiing.
Consider setting aside some holiday time for yourself
Many people dedicate their holiday time to loved ones, which can be meaningful and enjoyable. However, if you’re not finding time to care for yourself, you may burn yourself out. Consider setting aside a day or two of your time off to do whatever you want with no responsibilities and no other people present. You might schedule time on your calendar for this purpose and make it as important as other activities.
If you can’t have extended alone time, consider taking a few hours at night. For example, you might run yourself a bath with soaks and candles and listen to your favorite Christmas music, which can have a positive impact on mood. You can do whatever brings joy as long as you rest and practice relaxation strategies.
Do your holiday shopping differently
Holiday shopping can be a common stressor, even if it’s not the primary one. To give yourself a breather, consider changing how you shop for the holidays. For example, you might try ordering your groceries online or asking someone you love to pick up your items for you. You could also try shopping at less busy times, such as early in the morning or later in the evening, and not on weekends.
Practice relaxation exercises like deep breathing
Many people recommend deep breathing for stress. By slowly breathing and focusing on your breath, you are training your body to slow down and be grounded in the moment. You can take deep breaths anywhere at any time and try a variety of breathing practices. Deep breathing may be best in moments of anxiety or when you can’t get away from a stressor.
Try mindfulness to promote your mental health during the holidays
Mindfulness practices can have the same benefits as deep breathing, and these practices may be more effective for those who don’t respond well to breathing exercises. Mindfulness refers to paying attention to the present moment and the sensations you experience in that moment. You can do any activity mindfully, but many mindfulness practices are related to sensory stimuli. For example, a popular mindfulness practice is to feel the sensations in your body and listen to the sounds in your environment. These practices may help reduce unwanted thoughts and the negative feelings that arise from them.
How to respond to family members and loved ones with unrealistic expectations
Many people are stressed over the holidays based on unrealistic expectations, and some people may take out their stress by trying to pressure you or your loved ones into doing things. You can set boundaries with family members, although doing so can seem easier said than done. Below are some ways to respectfully set and keep your boundaries with loved ones:
- Stick to your word when you set a boundary, even if people struggle to accept what you’ve told them (not everyone responds well to boundaries, but you can still be confident in your choice).
- Don’t over-explain yourself or try to reduce feelings of guilt with reassurance-seeking.
- Don’t apologize for setting a respectful boundary or for not being able to fulfill a person’s request.
- If you want to avoid alcohol, you can simply state that you don’t want to drink, without having to give explanations.
- Practice self-care after setting a boundary if doing so is difficult for you. For example, you might take some time to yourself, practice meditation, and prioritize getting enough sleep.
- Have someone you’re close to validate your choice to set the boundary (if you don’t have anyone, talking to a mental health professional or support group can be helpful).
The benefits of virtual resources over the holidays
The holidays are busy but can also cause stores and businesses to set limited hours as employees spend more time at home with friends and family. For this reason, in-person services might not be available for everyone or at a time that’s convenient for you. Virtual resources like online shops, delivery apps, online holiday events, online support groups, and online therapy can be helpful in these moments. If you often get overwhelmed by leaving home during the holidays, consider searching for your most urgent needs online first.
The science behind deep breathing and mindfulness
When practicing emotional regulation skills, knowing the reasons they are effective may help. Below are some facts about the benefits of breathing and mindfulness practices:
- Mindfulness practice can increase self-compassion and improve physical health over time.
- Mindfulness may reduce symptoms of stress, depression, and anxiety in adults and children.
- Some studies have found that regular meditation can increase the size of the hippocampus in the brain, which may help with memory and learning.
- Just daily may be enough to increase focus in people living with anxiety.
- Diaphragmatic breathing may enhance cognitive performance and help reduce the effects of stress.
Professional support options
Having strategies on hand to cope in case you experience mental health challenges during the holiday season can be helpful. However, if you’re worried about going through the process alone, want more personalized advice, or are having severe mental health challenges, you might benefit from talking to a therapist who practices talk therapy. Over the holidays, an online therapy platform can also be a choice for therapy.
Through an online platform, you can connect with a therapist from home via phone, video, or live chat at a time that works for you. Some online therapists work over the holidays and in the evening or morning, allowing more clients to get support during busy moments. You can also message your therapist anytime via in-app messaging, and they’ll respond as soon as they can. Studies show that online therapy can be effective for reducing symptoms of anxiety and depression and increasing quality of life.
Takeaway
Frequently asked questions
Why do the holidays affect mental health?
The holidays can impact mental health for many reasons. For example, there is often a level of pressure put on individuals to have extra special holidays during the winter months, spend time with family, and make good money to be able to afford one’s holiday budget. People may experience financial stress, interpersonal conflict, and burnout as they work to make the holidays worthwhile. In addition, for those who do not have the conditions to celebrate the holidays as they want to, loneliness, a fear of missing out, and feeling sad can occur.
How do you maintain good mental health during the holidays?
Keeping your daily routine somewhat normal during the holidays may be helpful. In addition, scheduling some time for yourself outside of time with loved ones can ensure you get time in to reflect and cope if you’re experiencing increased stress. Eat nutritious meals, get physical activity in, and spend time with those you love. Ensure you also put some time aside for important activities like sleep, self-care, and drinking water. If you’re experiencing a complicated challenge like grief, reminders of holiday trauma, or physical conditions worsened by stress, you may also consider talking to a therapist about how to prepare for feeling stressed over the holiday. If you have a mental health crisis, call or text the Crisis Lifeline at 988.
Do depression rates rise during the holidays?
Yes, rates of depression do tend to rise during the holidays. In 2023, 41% of people reported an increase in depression symptoms over the holidays. These increases may be due to the factors commonly present over the holidays, such as financial stress, social pressures, loneliness, cold weather, dark days, and family conflicts. If you feel overwhelmed by sadness and are struggling with mental wellness over the holidays, you’re not alone. Reach out for support by talking to a therapist online or in your area.
What are the biggest holiday stressors?
The holidays are often expected to be the most wonderful time of the year with fun events like Christmas parties and games like Secret Santa. However, individuals living with stressors or mental health conditions may not agree. Some of the most common holiday stressors include not having a community to turn to, loneliness, financial distress, family conflict, work, and holiday shopping. People going through unique stressors like grief, loss, trauma, or another challenge may be at an even higher risk of mental health consequences.
Is a holiday good for mental health?
Holidays can be beneficial for mental health in some cases, especially when someone has a healthy family environment, enough financial resources, and time to celebrate. Whether the holidays benefit mental health may depend on each individual’s unique circumstances. Even if you struggle with some aspects of the holiday season, you can find ways to improve your mental health by changing your mindset, finding new ways to connect with others, and establishing your own traditions. You don’t have to celebrate the holidays, either, if they are too stressful for you.
How can I make my mental health stable?
Professional mental health treatment is generally considered the most effective way to stabilize mental health, and there are many modes of treatment to consider, such as the following:
- Psychotherapy (talk therapy)
- Support groups
- Medication (only prescribed and managed by a doctor or nurse practitioner)
- Light therapy for seasonal depression
- Alternative treatments like TMS therapy or ECT
- Group therapy
- Family therapy
- Couples therapy
- Psychoeducation
You can also practice self-care and coping mechanisms at home or on the go to protect your mental health on a daily basis and reduce stress.
The BetterHelp platform is not intended to provide any information regarding which medication or medical treatment may be appropriate for you. The content provides generalized information that is not specific to one individual. Do not take any action without consulting a qualified medical professional.
Why are the holidays so hard for me?
There are various reasons you may struggle on the holidays. For some, the pressure of wanting to have “perfect” holidays can be stressful. For others, life circumstances like a lack of financial freedom or long hours at work can be difficult. Regardless of the cause of your stress, you may benefit from seeking support from a therapist.
How do holidays affect mental health?
Holidays are associated with increased stress, depression, and anxiety. For some, holidays might have further associations with trauma or loss. However, the holidays can also be beneficial, uniting people with their loved ones and allowing a shared spirit of joy and giving. Many people give back to their communities on the holidays, donating to charities or volunteering to better the lives of everyone around them.
Why is anxiety worse on the holidays?
Anxiety may be worse on the holidays because of increased pressure to perform or to have a certain experience. People may look up to media representations of the holidays to decide how to celebrate, and if their lives don’t match up to what they see, they might worry they’re missing out or doing it wrong. If you’re experiencing severe anxiety that makes daily functioning difficult for you, consider seeking support from a mental health professional. There are ways to make your holidays stress-free with support.
How do you survive Christmas and improve your mental health?
If you’re dreading Christmas because of your mental health, you’re not alone. If Christmas doesn’t seem to be a holiday you want to celebrate, you don’t have to. However, if you want to celebrate but your stress is more focused on how to celebrate, the above tips may be helpful to you. Ensure you set aside some time each day for self-care and get enough sleep each night. Drink water, eat nutritious meals, get exercise, and spend time with loved ones. If you don’t have people to spend time with or your loved ones cause you more stress, you might consider spending Christmas alone or volunteering your time to help others.
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