Talk To Someone: One Key To Happiness
- For those experiencing suicidal thoughts, please contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988
- For those experiencing abuse, please contact the Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
- For those experiencing substance use, please contact SAMHSA National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357
Since 2018, over 30% of US adults report feeling lonely, and more than 58% of adults since 2019 feel misunderstood by those in their life. Although social media and online connections are possible, many Americans feel lonely despite their connection to the internet. Studies show that talking to another person face-to-face, whether online through a video chat or in person at an office, can have significant benefits for overall well-being and happiness.
Why does social interaction improve mental health?
Many psychological experiments have been done to determine why humans and animals fare better in groups or when receiving healthy physical and emotional support. One study on Maslow's hierarchy of needs showcased that love, belonging, and affection were essential to human health.
In addition, physical and mental health are intrinsically connected. When one element of health is poor, the other may also be. Individuals subjected to long-term loneliness, isolation, and social ridicule are often at a higher risk for physical illnesses like heart disease, chronic stress, high blood pressure, and other medical and mental health conditions.
Although social interaction is essential, many types of social interaction can fill these needs. For example, friendships, romantic relationships, and familial relationships are some of the most popular types of relationships for this cause. However, people may meet their social needs by attending support groups, talking to a therapist in person or online, joining a club, or attending local events. For those without a healthy family, a "chosen family" may be created from friends, community members, and other loved ones.
Why face-to-face conversations improve mood and mental health
There are various ways that talking to someone face-to-face can improve your mood. The following elements may go into the effectiveness of these types of conversations.
Body language
Text messages, social media posts, and written words can be misconstrued, as body language and vocal tone are not involved. For this reason, many misunderstandings, arguments, and discussions happen online that might not happen in person. With many human elements missing from messaging, the feelings behind a message can be left up to interpretation, and each person has their own opinion on how to interpret messages.
Communication technologies via webcam, such as Skype, Zoom, and Facetime, were developed as an answer to overcome the limitations of screen-based communication. With it, individuals can hear and see more of what the other person may hope to communicate through their digital body language. Face-to-face conversations in person can also be beneficial, as tone of voice and body language may be more apparent in physical scenarios.
Meaningful conversation
For many, severe and life-changing news can be easier to cope with or understand in person. Forming meaningful social connections can be similar. Seeing someone's face when you talk to them can help you form a deeper bond, as you can see them outside of a one-dimensional conversation through a message.
Experience
Face-to-face conversations can help you learn whether you have something in common with another person. For example, you might both have a similar disability, life experience, or way of living that is not communicated through messaging.
There is evidence that happiness relates to a greater sense of social connection. Talking to someone offers many benefits—it can help you learn new lessons. Talk to someone with different life experiences than your own to deepen your understanding of yourself and relate to other people's perspectives as well.
Quality over quantity
Humans often feel an innate desire to feel known, understood, and accepted. These can be complex states to achieve in relationships based on short-term or low levels of contact. Social media can put a high value on popularity, likability, "perfection," and traits that may not be realistic in real life.
Online platforms like Snapchat, TikTok, and Instagram often allow people to change how they look through filters. Some people do not use real names or personas on social media. For these reasons and others, online relationships may not be as in-depth as in-person or face-to-face online relationships. Studies have also found that, due to online facial filters, many social media users start to objectify themselves and others online.
An increase in mental and physical health
People who open and freely express themselves to others tend to be happier and healthier mentally and physically due to social connection. Talking to others can allow you to vent negative emotions so that you do not have to carry them around alone.
Communication for crisis situations
For those who are in extreme emotional distress, are thinking about self-harm or suicide, or are ready to get help for substance use, crisis lifelines provide support for individuals who need to talk to someone right away. A crisis line is a free service and support network for those who need to talk about their next step with someone who listens and can understand what they need. They can also offer further helpful resources for when the crisis point has passed. A crisis line text service can also be available for those who need someone to talk to but don’t necessarily have it in them at that moment to speak. There are also services for TTY users, available for the Deaf and hard of hearing. Some essential crisis lines include:
- The Suicide and Crisis Hotline (formerly known as the Suicide Prevention Hotline)
- The Domestic Violence Support Hotline
- SAMSAH’s National Helpline
Counseling options
At times, individuals desire connection but do not have anyone available to turn to. They might be geographically isolated, struggle with developing friendships, or lack social practice. They might also struggle with social anxiety disorder, which involves severe anxiety surrounding social situations. In these cases, an online therapist can be a practical resource if you feel stuck. A mental health professional can help you overcome barriers to connecting with others and build new skills to feel more confident getting out with others and developing genuine relationships.
With an online professional, you can still receive face-to-face social interaction while sitting at home and talking to a therapist through video chat software instead of in their office. For many experiencing social challenges, video chatting can feel more comforting and safer than in-person sessions. If you're not ready to meet over video, some online therapists also offer the option of phone or online chat messaging therapy.
Platforms like BetterHelp offer a match-based system so individuals can get matched without doing any of the work of looking for an effective provider. In addition, according to clinical studies, online therapy effectively treats a wide array of mental health issues, from social anxiety to depression and PTSD. To sign up for most platforms, you may be asked to complete a short questionnaire and can often get matched with a therapist within 48 hours.
Takeaway
How can I talk to someone for free?
Whether you need to talk to someone because you’re feeling down and lonely, need advice for handling a challenging situation, or just want to talk for fun, there are many free options.
For example, apps like HearMe and Lyf are suitable for individuals looking to chat with someone who can lend a sympathetic ear or put in their two cents' worth if needed. It’s essential to note that these types of sites are not a substitute for professional guidance from a mental health specialist, and they aren’t appropriate for emergency situations. If you’re looking for help with a mental health issue, there are many options for free (or affordable) counseling both online and in person.
Note: If you or someone you know is experiencing a mental health emergency, contact the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline (formerly known as the Suicide Prevention Hotline), the Domestic Violence Support Hotline, or the SAMSAH National Helpline immediately. Help is available 24/7.
Why is it good to talk to someone?
Talking to someone can have numerous benefits for both your mental and emotional health, but there are other ways that conversation can help you. Here are some benefits of talking to others:
Emotional Support And Connection.
Loneliness and isolation can be harmful to mental health, and talking to someone can help your brain process your feelings, feel better understood, and be more connected to the world around you. It can help alleviate the burden of carrying your worries all by yourself, reduce stress and tension, and gain a sense of relief.
Self-Validation
Discussing your feelings and experiences with someone can validate your emotions. It can help you recognize that what you're going through is normal and that your feelings are valid.
Growth And Self-Discovery
Engaging with people from different backgrounds and perspectives can broaden your horizons, expand your knowledge, and maybe even help you develop new ideas for solving problems. Communication with others can also help you gain insight into your own thoughts and feelings. By verbalizing your thoughts, you may gain a clearer understanding of your own beliefs and values. Conversing regularly can enhance your communication skills, making it easier to express yourself and understand others.
Strengthens Relationships
Talking to someone, whether it's a friend, family member, or therapist, can strengthen your relationships. Open and honest communication is essential for building trust and intimacy with others.
Where can I talk to someone?
There are so many outlets where one can talk to other people for many purposes. For example, if you’d like to meet people online, sites like Chat Avenue, Omegle, and Emerald Chat are a few options for mingling.
If you’re looking for mental health services, there are online platforms that provide a safe space for individuals to speak with a licensed professional experienced in treating a variety of conditions. You may also find resources for in-person therapy through your insurance provider or primary care physician.
For people searching for a mate or partner, online dating sites are a great place to begin talking to someone online before you meet up.
Finally, for those who prefer their conversations in person, a quick internet search will typically yield plenty of resources for where to find meetup groups in your area based on interests and hobbies.
What is the proper way to talk to someone?
The proper way to talk to someone depends on various factors, including the context, the nature of your relationship with the person, and your communication goals. Here are some general guidelines for effective communication:
Listen actively and show you're engaged by making eye contact, nodding, and providing verbal cues like "I see," "I understand," or "Go on."
Treat the person respectfully and courteously, regardless of age, gender, background, or beliefs. Avoid interrupting, talking over them, or being condescending. Practicing respect and courtesy also includes respecting others’ boundaries—if a person is uncomfortable discussing a particular subject, honor their wishes and change the subject.
Be patient and avoid judgment. Providing a listening ear means giving the other person time to express themselves fully, even if it takes a while. Rushing the conversation can lead to misunderstandings. Try to withhold judgment and avoid making assumptions about the other person. Instead, seek to understand their perspective before forming opinions. If the conversation becomes emotional or tense, remain calm and composed. Avoid raising your voice or becoming defensive.
Find helpful ways to show them you understand their perspective and feelings. Empathizing with their emotions can help build rapport and trust.
Speak clearly and concisely and try to stay on topic. Avoid using jargon or complex language that the other person might not understand. Stick to the topic at hand and avoid going off on tangents. If the conversation drifts, gently steer it back to the main point.
Encourage conversation by asking open-ended questions that require more than a yes or no answer. This can help the conversation flow and allow the other person to express themselves.
Be mindful of your body language, whether you’re in a video chat or talking to someone in person. Maintain an open and friendly posture, avoid crossing your arms, and use appropriate gestures to enhance your message.
Use “I” statements. When expressing your thoughts or feelings, use "I" statements to tell how you feel or what you think without accusing or blaming the other person. For example, say, "I feel frustrated when..." instead of "You always..."
Give feedback— but only if invited. If you need to provide feedback or discuss a sensitive issue, use constructive language and focus on the specific behavior or situation rather than making it personal.
How do you talk to someone online?
The same rules for talking to someone in person apply to online conversations, too. Be sure to treat others the way you would like to be treated, practice respect and courtesy, and try to forge a solid connection.
How can I talk to a friend?
Talking to a friend may seem as if it should be easier than talking to a stranger or an acquaintance, but this isn’t always the case. Whether you’re anticipating a difficult conversation or are just looking for casual bonding time with your best friend, practice active listening, ask open-ended questions, and have empathy. If you need support, let them know. If they’re struggling with something, ask how you can help.
How to talk to boys online?
You can use many strategies to talk to boys online— your approach should be tailored to your purposes. Whether you’re looking for a romantic spark or simply want a fun, friendship-first interaction, you may begin by commenting on something in his profile or finding a common interest to talk about. You may add some fun conversation games like “Would you rather?” or “Two truths and a lie.”
Once you’ve gotten the ball rolling, asking open-ended questions about his life will let him know you’re interested in him personally and would like to get to know him better.
How can I talk to random people?
Talking to random people can seem intimidating, but it can make a big difference if you approach them with positivity, confidence, and warmth. Introducing yourself may be an excellent place to start. Complements on things other than appearance, such as a bag or shoes, may be appropriate depending on the situation, or you may break the ice by asking if they know a great place to get lunch nearby.
If they offer up information that resonates with you, use it as a “side-door conversation.” For example, if they say, “Oh yeah, there’s a great vegetarian place around the corner,” you may ask if they’re vegetarian and continue the conversation from there. Cracking a joke or making lighthearted comments throughout may help build rapport and keep the conversation lively.
Why is it hard to talk to people?
If you find it hard to talk to people, you’re not alone. It’s been estimated that over 200 million people in the US have anxiety over public speaking or talking to others.
There are many reasons why some have difficulty talking to people. For example, mental health conditions like anxiety disorders can make conversing with others very difficult. Introverted people may not feel comfortable interacting verbally with others.
Some people have a hard time due to fear of rejection, being misunderstood, or feeling embarrassed. Others may simply have underutilized communication skills and find it easier to talk to people with time and practice.
Why am I not talking to anyone?
If you have an aversion to talking with others, it could be a sign of something more serious, such as depression, anxiety, or other disorders. Reaching out to those who know you best, such as friends or family members, can help. If you think you may be dealing with a mental health condition or other issues affecting your emotional well-being, speaking to a mental health professional is the first step to healing.
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