10 Things To Do When Feeling Sadness
Most of us have experienced some form of sadness at least once. Whether because of a recent disappointment, grief, or for seemingly no reason, sadness is a natural part of the human experience.
Often, melancholy or short bursts of sad emotions pass relatively quickly on their own. However, these feelings may sometimes linger for days, weeks, months, or even years. If you're experiencing lasting sadness, there are a few steps you can take to try to reduce the impact of the emotion and feel better.
Here, you’ll find a number of helpful suggestions for things you can do to help alleviate feelings of sadness or melancholy, as well as some guidance for differentiating between sadness and depression.
Things to try when you feel sad
1. Treat yourself with kindness
Remembering to be kind to yourself and not judge your emotions may be a helpful first step. Research suggests that feelings are not inherently "good" or "bad"—they are natural biological reactions. It may be helpful to think of your emotions as your body’s way to communicate something to us that we can learn from. In the present moment, take a deep breath and be patient with yourself.
While negative emotions like sadness can be exhausting, it’s important to engage in positive self-talk—negativity can compound the problem, allowing sadness and frustration to build up and persist longer.
If you wouldn't condemn a friend for struggling and tell them to "get over it," it may be worth treating yourself with the same level of respect, understanding, and patience as you work through challenging emotions. Remember, there is always hope for the future, even when things seem bleak.
2. Prioritize physical activity
Exercise is a known mood booster, and research has found physical activity can be an effective way to manage grief. Although it can be tough to motivate yourself to exercise when you’re feeling down, you may find that getting some exercise can help mitigate sadness. Whether it’s a trip to the gym, a yoga class, or a short walk around the block, try to find a way to move your body each day.
3. Spend time in nature
Studies show that spending time in nature benefits your mental health. Getting outside can enable you to change your environment and detach from your negative thoughts briefly while experiencing the beauty of the world around you. Make it a habit to engage in some form of exercise regularly. You may find that you start to feel happier or more at ease over time.
4. Get plenty of sleep
Sleeping has also been proven to be an effective way to recharge. Sleep is one of the most important indicators of mental health. If you can get into a healthy nighttime routine that includes seven to eight hours of sleep, you may feel more energized and better able to face any struggles that come your way. You may also want to monitor how much you sleep during the day due to your sadness, as this can make it difficult for you to get much-needed rest at night.
5. Take a break
While taking a break may not always be possible, try to give yourself a moment to reset your thoughts when melancholic feelings become overwhelming. It may help to take a moment apart from the distractions of your negative thoughts and think about what matters to you and what you have to be grateful for.
You might also consider what you can practically do in the next few minutes about the challenges facing you. Gauge if you are looking at the entirety of the situation instead of just giving in to the automatic thoughts that convince you things are bleak or worse.
Research indicates that you are in control of your thoughts and emotions, not vice-versa. Just because you have an idea or feeling does not mean it is the whole truth. These thoughts may only be part of a bigger picture, and we often have the power to challenge our perspectives and seek a new sense of understanding.
6. Enjoy nutrient-rich foods
Extensive research shows that our nutritional choices can impact mood and mental health. A balanced diet of nutrient-dense foods can help you maintain stable blood sugar levels and help you achieve better mental clarity, while refined sugars and starches may contribute to feelings of sluggishness that often accompany sadness.
If you’re prone to emotional eating, it may be especially important to monitor your diet and prioritize healthy food choices to mitigate the effects on your mental and physical health.
7. Engage in mindfulness practices
Mindfulness practices can be an effective way to help you emotionally regulate. Consider engaging in deep breathing exercises or listening to a guided meditation. This can allow you to get out of your head and focus on your breath, body, or other thoughts that aren't related to the sadness you're experiencing.
8. Express your feelings
Sadness can bring up complex feelings. It may, for example, lead you to reflect on your circumstances, actions, or relationships in ways that can be uncomfortable. To help you work through these feelings, it may help to express yourself. You might, for example, write in a journal or call a friend or loved one. Don't be afraid to cry if you need to, as it can be a healthy release of emotions.
9. Learn what you need
Not everyone responds to sadness in the same way. Some people may want to isolate themselves, while others prefer to surround themselves with as many people as possible to feel better. No matter the approach, it's crucial to recognize what works for you.
Try to be aware, however, of the way your choices may be either helping or harming you—sometimes, our natural reaction can limit our ability to care for ourselves. For example, spending too much time with others may not allow us to process and address what is really happening. Similarly, isolating may not allow us to have experiences outside of our sadness or connect with others. Finding a balance can provide a healthy escape while still allowing for reflection.
10. Seek out new experiences
If you’re unsure of what you need, it can help to seek out new experiences. For example, you could:
- Start a DIY project
- Volunteer
- Make plans with a friend
- Go to a concert
- Try a new type of exercise
- Discover a new nature trail
Take the time to explore the different avenues available to you that can bring happiness.
Sadness or depression?
If feelings of hopelessness, despair, and fatigue are persistent, you may be experiencing depression. Clinical depression is a mental health condition, and just like other conditions, it can often be managed with the help of a professional. Symptoms of depression include:
- Persistent sadness or low mood
- Loss of interest or pleasure in activities once enjoyed
- Significant weight loss when not dieting, or weight gain, or decrease or increase in appetite
- Insomnia or excessive sleeping
- Restlessness or feeling slowed down
- Fatigue or loss of energy
- Feelings of worthlessness or excessive guilt
- Difficulty thinking, concentrating, or making decisions
- Intrusive thoughts of suicide or self-harm
In this case, though the above activities may help you feel better, a professional may be able to offer longer-term solutions through guidance and therapy exercises. A therapist can work with you to develop a treatment plan that suits your specific needs as an individual as well as your symptoms.
Online therapy for support with mental health
Online therapy can be conducted anywhere an internet connection is available, which may help remove some of the barriers of traditional treatment, such as lack of transportation or difficulty with leaving home due to depression or other conditions.
Research has found online therapy effective for treating various conditions and issues, including depression, anxiety, PTSD, and relationship concerns. Another study focused on online therapy and depression found that 71% of users of online counseling found it more effective than traditional in-person counseling.
Takeaway
Taking the time to understand yourself and your sadness or depression better may help you recognize how to work through them. Strategies like self-love and self-compassion, meditation, breathing techniques, and getting enough rest may all contribute to overcoming persistent feelings of melancholy. When huge emotions happen, it's essential to remember that healing is a process, and patience with yourself is crucial.
If these issues continue to persist and are getting in the way of your day-to-day life, a therapist can help. Take the first step by reaching out for help from a counselor.
How do you deal with unhappiness?
It can be challenging to cope when we’re faced with unhappiness. The best way to deal with unhappiness often depends on one’s traits and experiences. While coping strategies may vary between people, you might consider the following:
Identify the root cause(s) of your unhappiness
Sometimes, it’s obvious, but the source of unhappiness isn’t as easy to spot in many cases. Is it in response to external situations like troubles with work or relationships? Or is your unhappiness the result of something more internalized, like self-doubt, unprocessed emotions, or unmet expectations?
Allow yourself to feel unhappy
Suppressing and avoiding your emotions isn’t only unproductive, but it can also be harmful to our health. Acknowledge your feelings and accept that unhappiness is a part of the human experience. Welcoming your emotions also allows you to understand them better. Spend time journaling or recording your emotions to learn more about your relationship with them.
Practice self-compassion
Be kind to yourself during difficult times and avoid self-judgment and negative self-talk. Think about how you label yourself when you’re unhappy. You aren’t a “bad” or “negative” person for feeling sad. Everyone has moments of discontent or sadness—you deserve the same compassion you’d give a friend.
Do things that bring you joy
Engage in a hobby, learn a new skill, socialize with loved ones, or treat yourself. Even small things like taking a walk can bring happiness and contentment. Consider trying something new, like learning a new skill, playing a sport you’ve never tried, or exploring new places. Whatever you choose, do things that make you feel good about yourself and nurture your well-being. Sometimes, distracting yourself with enjoyable or creative activities can boost your mood.
Focus on gratitude
Practicing gratitude can help shift your focus from the negative to the positive. Reflect on the things, people, or experiences you’re grateful for in your daily life. Let your loved ones know that you appreciate them, and practice random acts of kindness that encourage gratitude in others.
Exercise
Physical activity is clinically proven to help alleviate symptoms of depression and unhappiness. Even light physical activity like walking or stretching can reduce stress and boost mood by releasing endorphins. Take time out to move every day as part of a self-care routine.
Practice meditation or mindfulness
Mindfulness can ground you in the present moment, reducing overthinking or worrying about the future. Mindfulness can also help you cultivate more gratitude and empathy. Try meditation, grounding techniques, guided visualization, or breathing exercises.
Ask for help
Sharing your thoughts and feelings with someone you trust can make you feel better and provide a new perspective. If unhappiness persists or interferes with your daily functioning, speaking to a therapist or counselor can provide you with tools and techniques to manage difficult emotions. Sometimes, professional guidance is necessary.
How do you feel joy again?
Establishing a joyful mindset is possible, even in challenging times. Consider volunteering in your community for a cause you care about or practicing selflessness in other ways. Often, doing things for others can bring more joy than just focusing on yourself.
That said, self-kindness can help cultivate greater joy, too. Engage in activities that bring you pleasure or make you feel good about yourself. For example, you might indulge in a spa day or a new outfit that makes you feel confident. Spend time with friends, learn something new, or do something you’ve never tried before. If possible, consider adopting a pet. Research on the topic is ongoing, but many studies suggest that having a pet can boost mental health and well-being.
How can I let go of sadness?
Letting go of sadness begins with identifying its source. Reflect on the things in your life that take away and contribute to your sadness. Does your sadness stem from challenges with work or relationships, or is it more internalized because of self-doubt, unfulfilled potential, or lack of self-esteem? Sometimes, living inauthentically can cause sadness. Think about your values and priorities and how your life aligns with those right now. Once you regroup and realign, it might be easier to let go of the sadness and move towards more joy in your life.
Letting go of sadness sometimes requires letting go of resentment, shame, guilt, or regrets about the past. Sometimes, that means settling a conflict with someone else or resolving it within yourself. Accepting and allowing yourself to feel sad may also be necessary for letting it go. Experience sadness without self-criticism or judgment. Treat yourself with kindness, compassion, and understanding.
How can you show you’re sad without saying it?
While direct communication is typically preferable, it can feel overwhelming to come right out and tell someone you feel depressed or sad. There are many reasons why this could be, including stigma, perfectionism, fear of judgment, or fear of vulnerability, to name a few. If you want help but don’t know how to ask for it, you might consider writing a letter or creating art that reflects how you feel.
Talk about the ways that your feelings interfere with your daily life. For example, tell your friends and loved ones how you no longer enjoy doing certain things or that you feel isolated and unmotivated to be with others. Let them know if your emotions affect your concentration and focus or disrupt your sleep patterns. Sometimes, talking about the practicality of your experience can pave the way and make it easier to communicate on a deeper level.
How do you calm your mind?
Stressful situations, rumination, and overthinking can all contribute to overwhelm and make it challenging to stay calm. However, there are some strategies that might help you relax and calm your mind:
Breathing exercises: Abdominal, pursed lip, and box breathing are a few examples of deep breathing exercises that can calm the nervous system and focus your attention.
Meditation: Practicing meditation can help you learn to observe your thoughts without judgment, which reduces overthinking and promotes a calm mind.
Guided visualization: Imagining a peaceful place (a beach, forest, or favorite peaceful location) or a positive outcome to a stressful situation can shift your focus to a calmer environment and away from stress and anxiety.
Progressive muscle relaxation: Alternate tensing and relaxing different muscle groups can help relieve physical tension and ease mental stress.
Journal: Writing down your thoughts and feelings is an excellent way to process emotions, organize thoughts, and release “mental clutter.”
Take care of your body: Studies have shown the benefits of exercise and nutrition for stress relief and anxiety. Exercise reduces stress hormones like cortisol and releases endorphins, which are natural mood boosters, while balanced nutrition fuels healthy brain functioning. Studies also reveal that poor sleep can result in increased anxiety and distress levels.
Limit stimulation when possible: Too much noise, activity, or multitasking can overwhelm the mind. Turn off notifications, focus on one task at a time, and carve out time for quiet and stillness in your day.
Listen to music or nature sounds: Calming instrumental music or nature sounds like ocean waves or rainfall can help calm your body and mind.
Disconnect from technology: Constant bombardment with information and notifications can create “mental noise.” Set aside “no-tech” time in your day, perhaps at mealtimes or before bed, to give your mind a break.
Practice self-compassion: Remember that everyone gets overwhelmed sometimes, so avoid the temptation to criticize yourself for feeling stressed out. Practice kindness and speak to yourself as you would to a friend, with words of encouragement, patience, and understanding.
How can I hide my sadness?
While hiding or repressing your feelings can be harmful to your physical and mental health, there might be times when you feel the need to hide them (such as at work or in social situations). Begin by calming the body with deep breaths and grounding exercises. If necessary, go somewhere you can be alone when your feelings become overwhelming. During conversation, smile, maintain relaxed and open body language, and frame the discussion with positive words.
Reflect on why, when, and where you feel sad. Avoiding the sources can help you avoid overwhelming feelings. Finally, if your feelings persist, talk to a mental health professional. They can help you uncover the roots of the sad feelings and process them. They’ll also help you identify and find ways to reframe the thought patterns accompanying sadness into more positive, productive thoughts.
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