Common Symptoms Of Grief: What Can You Expect?

Grief can be viewed as a common response to loss that often affects both the mind and the body. Common symptoms of grief include intense sadness, trouble concentrating, and disruptions to daily life. Physically, you might experience sleep or digestive problems, which may make the grieving process even tougher.

You or a loved one may be experiencing various symptoms of grief during this challenging time. In many cases, the experience of grief is temporary, with people going through grief in their own ways and on their own timeless. However, grief can also become a serious, chronic challenge that requires professional support. Knowing what to expect may make it easier to find ways to cope and heal.

Why do people experience grief?

Factors influencing grief

• Type of loss: The grief process can depend on whether the deceased experienced a sudden or violent death.
• Relationship: The closeness to the deceased can affect the intensity of grief.
• Personal factors: Mental illness or other pre-existing conditions may also play a role.

In general, there are two main types of grief: uncomplicated and complicated grief. Uncomplicated grief usually refers to the typical grieving process in which a person eventually adapts and is able to resume daily activities. In contrast, grief can become complicated when intense emotions and longing for the deceased persist, making it challenging to move forward.

Many people progress through various stages of grief, which can include denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. The process can be deeply personal and tends to vary among people, with some experiencing the stages in a different order and sometimes repeating or going through a single phase for a prolonged period.

Common symptoms of grief

Grief can affect all aspects of a person's emotional, mental, and physical well-being. Awareness of the signs and symptoms of grief may help you seek the appropriate support.

Sadness

Sadness can be a common part of grief. You may experience deep sorrow and a sense of emptiness that can be overwhelming and long-lasting. Crying can be a natural way to express this emotion. For instance, you might tear up when you encounter a reminder of your loved one, like a favorite song or a special place you visited together. Some may find relief in expressing their sadness, while others might sense they are “stuck” in their sorrow.

Guilt

Guilt often occurs alongside grief. You may experience a sense of responsibility for what happened, blaming yourself for things you did or didn't do. This guilt can become a heavy burden, making it hard to find peace. Sometimes, you might hold guilt for moving on or experiencing moments of happiness. For example, you might experience guilt for laughing at a joke or enjoying a meal, thinking that you shouldn't feel joyful when your loved one is gone.

Anxiety

Anxiety can be another common symptom of grief. It may develop as constant worry about the future or fear about what might happen next. This anxiety can disrupt daily life, making it hard to focus and stay calm. You may experience panic attacks or an intense sense of dread. For instance, you might constantly check on your loved ones, worried that something bad will happen to them, too.

Loneliness

Loneliness can be an intense part of grieving. The absence of a loved one often leaves a void, and this can make daily life seem empty. You might experience isolation, even in the company of others. This loneliness can lead to social withdrawal, sometimes making it hard to reconnect with friends or family.

Fatigue

Fatigue tends to be a common physical symptom of grief. The emotional weight of grief can drain your energy, leaving you persistently tired. This exhaustion can interfere with daily activities and responsibilities. It is often more than just sleepiness; it can be a deep sense of weariness that makes everything seem like a tremendous effort.

Numbness

Numbness is often experienced during the grieving process. It usually involves a sense of disconnection from your emotions or surroundings and may serve as a temporary form of defense against overwhelming feelings. People might describe this as being in a fog, unable to fully engage with life. While numbness can provide short-term relief, it can also delay the grieving process. For instance, you might find yourself going through daily routines like eating or working without being present or aware of your actions.

Shock

Shock can occur immediately after a loss. It may be the body's way of defending you from the initial blow. Shock can arise as disbelief, denial, or a sense of unreality. If you’re in shock, you might sense that you are going through the motions without fully experiencing life. This response can be brief, or it may linger for a while.

Yearning

Yearning can be described as a deep longing for your lost loved one. It usually involves an intense desire to have them back, often occurring alongside painful reminders of their absence. Yearning can lead to searching behaviors, such as looking for signs or keeping the deceased’s belongings as they were when they were alive. You might find yourself reaching for your phone to call them, only to remember they’re no longer there, which can bring a fresh wave of pain. Yearning can be a natural part of missing someone deeply. 

Confusion

Confusion can be a mental symptom of grief. The loss of a loved one may affect your sense of reality, leading to disorientation. Confusion can make decision-making difficult and lead to forgetfulness or an inability to concentrate. Adapting to a new reality without a loved one can be challenging.

Difficulty concentrating

Difficulty concentrating tends to be another common symptom. The mind may often return to thoughts of the deceased, making it hard to focus on other tasks. This can affect work, school, and everyday responsibilities. Grief can consume your mental resources, leading to decreased productivity and increased frustration.

Sleep disturbances

Sleep disturbances can be common during the grieving process. These disturbances can include trouble falling asleep, staying asleep, or experiencing nightmares. Emotional turmoil and stress can keep the mind active at night, potentially leading to insomnia. Sleep disruptions may affect overall health, worsening other physical and emotional symptoms of grief. For example, you might lie awake for hours, unable to stop thinking about your loved one, which can leave you exhausted and drained the next day.

Changes in appetite

Changes in appetite are typical when grieving. You might experience an unusual loss of appetite or overeat to find comfort. These eating changes can lead to weight loss or gain, further affecting physical health. It may be helpful to maintain nutritious eating habits, even when it's challenging.

Physical aches and pains

Physical aches and pains often accompany grief and may include headaches, chest pain, or general body aches. The emotional stress of grief may take a toll on the body, manifesting as real, tangible pain. Some people might also experience stomach problems, muscle tightness, or extreme tiredness.

These are just some of the most common symptoms of grief. You might experience a few or all of them. Some symptoms may be more severe or long-lasting than others.

Finding support for grief

People can find support for grief in several ways. Friends and family members can often provide emotional support. Talking with people you trust may reduce isolation, especially if you’re experiencing intense or traumatic grief.

Support groups may allow you to share your thoughts with others who have gone through similar experiences. Many local communities and online platforms host these groups. You may find that being part of a support group helps manage your loneliness and teaches practical coping strategies.

Therapy may also be key to managing grief. Those experiencing complications of grief like post-traumatic stress disorder, severe anxiety, or substance misuse (formerly referred to as substance abuse) might benefit from professional guidance. Seeking help can be especially important if grief interferes with daily life.

Online therapy may be a potential option when seeking professional help. Online therapy services often provide flexible scheduling, which may be helpful for those living with debilitating symptoms of grief.

BetterHelp can match you with licensed therapists who specialize in grief counseling. The platform allows you to communicate through video calls, phone calls, or online chat, making it convenient to find support that fits your needs and schedule. 

Studies show that online therapy can be as effective as in-person therapy for managing grief. Research indicates that virtual sessions may reduce symptoms of depression and anxiety related to loss.