How To Talk To Your Boss About Your Mental Health And Advocate For Your Needs

Talking about your mental health at work can be intimidating. Many people worry that speaking up about a mental illness will expose them to discrimination and stigma. On the other hand, informing your employer that you’re facing mental health challenges may help them better support you and accommodate your needs at work. We’ll review the pros and cons of sharing mental health information at work and suggest some effective ways to talk to your boss about your mental health if you decide to do so.

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Do you have to tell your boss about your mental health challenges?

The short answer is no. There’s no legal requirement in the United States to share anything about your mental health with your employer. In fact, there are strict limits on how much they can ask you about it. Unless you have a psychiatric condition that would prevent you from performing a specific job function (or you’re taking medication that would interfere with your duties), your boss can’t make your mental health status a condition of your employment.

There’s been relatively little research into the outcomes of sharing information about one’s mental health status in the workplace. One 2021 study does suggest that workers were substantially more likely to have a positive experience after letting their employers know about their mental illness. However, this research was conducted in the Netherlands, and it’s not clear whether the results would be similar elsewhere. You’ll generally need to weigh the possible risks and rewards of letting your boss know your mental health status, given the particulars of your situation. 

Potential benefits of talking to your boss about your mental health

A 2019 survey identifies four perceived, potential advantages of speaking about one's mental health challenges in the workplace:

1. It may improve relationships with coworkers and supervisors. Others in your workplace may be better able to empathize with you if they have some idea of what you’re experiencing. Your employer might also appreciate the initiative you're showing by looking for ways to manage your work responsibilities given your mental health needs.
2. Concealment can be a burden. Many employees report that the effort of keeping their mental health challenges secret can be a significant source of stress. Others may hope to pave the way for wider acceptance of mental illnesses by being open about their own mental health. 
3. It can enable accommodations. By law, employers in the US are required to provide reasonable accommodations to enable employees with disabilities to do their jobs effectively. For example, if a more flexible schedule would make it easier to manage your symptoms, your employer may be able to help.
4. Speaking up may help improve your work environment. By starting a dialogue about mental health, you may be able to promote a more positive, inclusive company culture. 

Potential drawbacks of talking to your boss about your mental health

Though education and awareness around mental health have increased, research suggests that employment discrimination against people with mental illnesses remains widespread. If your boss or coworkers have discriminatory attitudes about mental health conditions, letting them know what you’re experiencing could expose you to harassment or unequal treatment. Even if there’s no overt discrimination, it could be a barrier to advancement. 

You’ll likely want to consider your workplace culture before making this decision. Have you heard managers or coworkers making disparaging comments about mental illness? Does the organization seem to take issues of inclusion seriously? If it doesn’t seem safe to share at your current workplace at this time, it may be in your best interest to wait.

Tips for telling your boss about your mental health challenges

If you do decide to talk to your employer about your psychological health, the way you go about it can have a significant impact on the outcome. The following tips may be worth considering. 

Think about how much to share

Telling your supervisor that you need mental health support doesn’t mean you need to reveal every detail. It’s typically okay to avoid identifying your specific diagnosis to them, for example. A good rule of thumb may be to share only the information your employer needs to support you effectively.

For example, if you need to take time off each week for therapy, you can say so; you don’t necessarily have to say what it’s for. Or, if you find yourself having a hard time at large work functions, you can explain that you have difficulties related to social anxiety without going into detail. 

Know your rights

United States labor and disability laws prohibit discrimination based on mental health status and require employers to provide “reasonable accommodations” so that you can do your job effectively. The details can be important, though. It’s generally best to read up on both federal and local laws to make sure you know things like:

• What kind of information can your employer request?
• How are specific accommodations determined?
• What recourse do you have if your boss reacts negatively?

Get help where you can

If you’re not sure what’s involved in seeking workplace accommodations for mental health conditions, you may want to talk to someone with more experience. For example, it could be a good idea to consult a therapist, as they may be able to suggest some specific accommodations that might benefit you. Discussing your situation with a legal professional who specializes in employment law might also be a good idea.

Choose the right time

If you’re going to share a mental health matter with your employer, when you talk to them could be as important as how you talk to them. First of all, it’s generally best to not delay too long. If your work duties are exacerbating your mental or emotional challenges, try not to wait until you’re falling behind on your tasks, getting into conflicts with coworkers, or experiencing a sharp decline in your well-being. Sharing too early might also pose a problem, however. The longer you’ve been employed there and the more valuable you are to the company, the more likely they may be to work with you on finding solutions.

Note also that it’s generally best to avoid discussing your mental health during the hiring process unless you’re certain that it will conflict with your duties. Regardless of the legality, research suggests that people on the employer’s side of the interview table—including human resources workers, who in theory should be striving for an inclusive workplace—tend to view candidates with a mental illness as potential risks. 

Focus on how you can be an effective employee

During your meeting with your boss, you may want to keep the emphasis on how you can handle your work effectively. If you come prepared with suggestions for reasonable accommodations that will allow you to continue to fulfill your responsibilities, it can signal your commitment and remind your employer of your value to the team. 

Examples of common workplace accommodations for those with a mental illness include:

• A more flexible schedule to work around therapy appointments or give you time to recharge
• Permission to work in a remote or hybrid capacity
• Assistive devices
• Changes to your office environment 
• Specialized communication and oversight styles

You may also want to ask about any existing resources your company may offer for mental health support. Again, taking a solution-focused approach can help keep the conversation on the right track.

Model straightforward communication

How you start the conversation can help set the tone for what follows. It can be helpful to take a matter-of-fact tone and discuss it just as you would a physical health challenge that might affect your work. If you don’t treat your mental illness as a reason to be ashamed, defensive, or apologetic, your employer may be more likely to react positively and supportively.

Help your boss understand

Though you may be intimately familiar with what it’s like to live with a certain mental illness, your supervisors likely aren’t. By sharing your perspective, you may be able to help them better empathize with you and support you. You don’t need to go deeper into your personal life than you’re comfortable with, but giving them a window into your everyday experience can sometimes be helpful.

You may also want to provide feedback about their accommodation efforts moving forward. Positive reinforcement can be especially useful. By letting your employer know when something they’ve done has made it easier to do your job effectively, you can make them feel good about working with you while encouraging constructive behavior in the future. 

Balancing work and mental health with the help of a therapist

All of the workplace accommodations in the world may not be enough if you’re not receiving adequate mental health care to manage your illness. If you’re not currently seeking support from a therapist, you might consider doing so. For those who have trouble fitting in therapy appointments due to a demanding work schedule, online therapy may represent a more convenient option. It’s often easier to schedule sessions when you can attend them remotely with no need for a commute, and your options won’t be limited to providers practicing nearby. 

With a platform like BetterHelp, you can get matched with a licensed therapist according to your needs and preferences. You can then meet with them via phone, video call, and/or in-app messaging from anywhere you have an internet connection. Although online therapy is a relatively new format, researchers are increasingly finding evidence that it can be an effective approach. For example, consider research from 2022 that suggests that there seems to be no difference in effectiveness between in-person and virtual therapy.

Takeaway

Deciding whether to share information about a mental health condition with your employer can be difficult, and you may want to carefully weigh the benefits and risks beforehand. If you decide to do so, offering specific ideas on how you can continue to perform at a high level can help steer the conversation in a productive direction. Don’t hesitate to ask for any assistance or resources the company can provide, and make sure you’re aware of your rights under the law.