Seeking A Shift In Your Life? How To Find Your Flow
People often go through shifts in their lives where they'd like to change careers, re-prioritize themselves, or start a new milestone. These shifts can be essential to healing and growing as a person, but they can also come with missteps, mistakes, and fear. Understanding how to find your flow when you make a change can be beneficial as you adjust to a new area of your life.
Why do shifts occur?
Life shifts can happen for various reasons. For example, some people may feel they have been giving too much of themselves to others for a long time, and they might realize they want to change this pattern. Other people might realize that they're no longer enjoying their job or they want to pursue higher education. Shifts often occur to prompt growth, motivation, and change.
Tapping into your creative energy and using it as a tool in your quest towards self-discovery can be enhanced by asking yourself what you truly want out of life. The answer to this question can change throughout the years, but keeping updated with your needs can allow you to be in tune with yourself.
Everyone can feel stimulated by different situations, activities, places, or people. Find the solutions in life that electrify you, allowing yourself the independence and leisure that can be the cornerstones of creative and personal success. When you need a change, listen to your body and mind to understand what would benefit you, even if it initially scares you.
How to find your flow
There are many ways that individuals try to find their flow after a life change or a shift in goals, including the following:
Reinvent yourself
Reinventing yourself may be part of finding a flow after a significant life change. Reconnect with yourself and learn more about what you want, who you are, and what you like and dislike. If you're looking for a more significant change, you might also consider traveling, moving abroad, or starting a new life phase, like university. These changes can set the stage for the new you and allow you to come closer to your goals.
Avoid burnout
Many people find they need a shift in life after caring for someone else more than themselves. Although social connection is essential for mental health and well-being, giving too much can be unhealthy and cause compassion fatigue, similar to burnout. Although you can be compassionate and loving, ask yourself what you need to feel at peace.
Avoid burnout
Finding happiness after burnout can take time and effort. Try not to be discouraged and practice radical acceptance to accept what you cannot change. You can look to others for guidance, but value your own voice as well, as your needs often come from within, not externally. If you need help from someone else, ask for it. Be willing to express your appreciation for the support from whoever is willing to give it. If you receive love graciously, you may feel more ready to give it in return.
Make time for your passions
Look for activities that can bring you joy. Set aside regular time to indulge in your passions. If you're unsure what makes you happy, it can be an opportunity to explore, test the waters, and learn new skills. For example, you could try the following:
Examples of activities to try
- Signing up for a skills class (cooking, baking, writing, etc.)
- Joining a local writing group
- Joining a local art group
- Traveling abroad and exploring the culture and interests there
- Staying at a hostel and going out with new friends
- Signing up for a beginner's music class (orchestra, band, choir, etc.)
- Signing up for a beginner's sports class (aerial acrobatics, swimming, figure skating, etc.)
- Signing up for a dance class or attending a dance workout class
- Going to the gym
- Visiting the local museums
- Joining an online group that meets in person in your area
- Going on a meditation or mindfulness retreat
- Trying spiritual practices or joining a religious congregation (if you want to)
As you explore new activities, you can create a list of your favorites. Even if you don't like one activity, you can tell stories about your time trying it and know more about what you dislike as well.
What does burnout look like?
If you've felt like you've reached the end of your rope, you might be experiencing burnout. Burnout can look like a feeling of exhaustion, knowing that a change is needed but unsure how to take the first step. These feelings can make change seem impossible or scary for many.
Is burnout a symptom of depression?
Burnout often involves mental, emotional, and physical exhaustion and may sometimes be a symptom of depression. It might not happen overnight but instead over a prolonged period of multiple challenges. If burnout is not addressed, you may begin to experience symptoms of depression and anxiety.
Signs of burnout
Signs of burnout can include the following:
- Anxiety
- Depression
- Irritability
- Exhaustion
- Sleep changes
- Mood swings and sensitivity to unexpected events
- Deteriorating health
- Distraction
- Struggling to concentrate
- Feeling resentful
- Substance use
- Withdrawing from friends and family
- Struggling to ask for help
If you are struggling with substance use, contact the SAMHSA National Helpline at (800) 662-4357 to receive support and resources. Support is available 24/7.
When experiencing burnout, it can be challenging to understand your symptoms. However, with professional support and lifestyle changes, someone with burnout may be able to change their mindset and find hope for their future.
Counseling support options
You might benefit from counseling if you're experiencing burnout or looking for guidance with a mental health challenge. Talking to a professional counselor can help you develop a solution for any life changes you're looking for, burnout you might be experiencing, or concerns about the future.
How to find your flow? Try online therapy
If you're struggling to find support in your area or have concerns about affording the cost of traditional therapy, you might benefit from seeing an online therapist. Studies have demonstrated that online therapy can make a positive difference in the lives of those experiencing mental illness. For example, if you have symptoms of anxiety and depression, online therapy can help you manage and reduce them. Online therapy is also more affordable than traditional therapy, and many people express that they are willing to open up more over online mediums than in-person.
If you're interested in taking the first step with an online therapist, you can sign up with an online platform like BetterHelp for guidance. BetterHelp has over 30,000 licensed therapists available to match with, with each specializing in unique challenges. You do not have to have a mental illness to meet with a therapist, either. Anyone may benefit from talking to a counselor for any concern.
Takeaway
Frequently asked questions
What does it mean when you feel a shift in your life?
The phrase “feeling a shift in your life” typically means you’ve experienced a noticeable change in your psychological or emotional state. It may indicate that your life is headed in a new direction or that you’ve found a new perspective, priorities, motivation, or mindset. You might find that your confidence in your ability to complete certain tasks has improved, you might feel like your productivity has increased, or you may feel like you have more power and greater control than you did before. You might also want to engage in an autotelic experience - or something that is done for the experience itself rather than out of necessity. Peak experiences are often those that enrich or fulfill a person’s life rather than those necessary to avoid or overcome adversity.
How do you make a shift in your life?
To start working towards what you want, consider trying the following steps:
- Reflect on where you are
- Identify areas for improvement
- Adopt Zen habits, like mindfulness and positive self-talk
- Make small changes in your day-to-day life
- Set SMART goals
- Turn to friends, family, or a therapist for support and immediate feedback.
Making small changes in your daily life can lead to lasting shifts throughout your entire life.
Many people set a goal to achieve flow state when working on tasks essential to their goals.
A flow state means that a person is completely absorbed in an activity. They typically do not notice the passage of time, remaining completely focused on the present moment. Many consider a flow state most closely associated with peak performance, making it a worthwhile goal for them to pursue. A life coach or other individual experienced in motivation and goal achievement may be able to help you find flow when trying to make a shift in your life.
How do you get used to change in life?
Life-changing events—such as moving, starting a new job, marriage, divorce, or a death in the family—can be overwhelming and unpredictable. To manage change, try the following:
- Accept what happened
- Acknowledge your feelings
- Prioritize self-care
- Seek support from friends and family
- Give yourself time to process the change
- Establish new routines and habits
- Set new goals
- Remember what you’re grateful for
Humans are biologically wired to crave predictability and control. While these strategies can make the process easier, adapting to life changes often takes time. Putting yourself on track to adjust to change is often easier to accomplish with support from others. It may be helpful to make a point of telling others about what you are trying to complete as you adjust to change.
How do I accept a sudden change in life?
Here are a few tips for coping with unexpected life changes:
- Accept that some things are outside of your control
- Consider what part of the change is difficult to accept or feel overwhelming
- Find the silver linings
- Think about other times you encountered sudden changes and how you coped with them.
- Talk with friends, family, and loved ones who might understand your situation.
- Work with a licensed therapist
- Try to adopt a problem-solving mindset
- Trust yourself to navigate the change
- Put things into perspective
- Challenge automatic thoughts
- Use healthy coping skills to enjoy the present moment
It might also be helpful to practice mindfulness, which prioritizes focusing on the present moment without experiencing adverse emotions. Mindfulness helps people understand the subjective experience of living, allowing for a non-judgmental approach to change in everyday life. Mindfulness also usually has a positive impact on a person’s overall mental state. According to research, regular mindfulness practices can lower anxiety, reduce stress, and help a person find a sweet spot between change and acceptance.
How do I get inspired to change my life?
If you’re looking for motivation to change your life, consider:
- Acknowledge the problem: Take some time to journal and reflect on your current situation, the challenges you’re experiencing, and how they make you feel.
- Take it one step at a time: Make small changes in your daily life, such as walking for 10 minutes per day if you want to improve your physical fitness. While it can be tempting to take many actions when you’re feeling highly motivated, you may be able to make a more lasting difference by setting more reasonable goals that can easily become healthy habits.
- Find positive influences: It can be helpful to curate the pages you follow on social media or otherwise surround yourself with people who challenge you to be the best version of yourself.
- Visualize the future you want: Think about what the future you want looks like, and then break it down into goals and milestones that help you move closer to that goal.
In addition to working independently, talking with friends, family, or a therapist can help. They may be able to provide you with an outside perspective and strategies that can help you work toward a better future. Friends or family may also share similar goals as you, and you can be there to hold each other accountable.
You may also want to investigate how to achieve a flow state. Flow theory asserts that a person can achieve a fully immersed state of action where they focus completely on the task at hand. Flow characteristics are typically similar from person to person; they are so focused on what they are doing that they lose track of time and are fully engaged in achieving their goal.
Many people adopt a pre-flow ritual to trigger flow states when needed. Rituals typically vary considerably from person to person. Some people might mediate, and others might engage in physical activity. Anything that helps a person enter a mental state where they can more easily maintain focus can be part of a pre-flow routine. It also helps to make sure that physical needs are met before trying to experience flow.
Why is change so hard to accept?
Change can be difficult to accept because it is:
- Unpredictable
- Disruptive to established habits
- Easy to view changes with a negative bias
- Challenging the concept of being in control of external forces
- Pushing you outside your comfort zone
You can make change a little easier by shifting your mindset to consider the opportunities, look for silver linings, and establish new habits.
Biological factors also play a role. The human brain naturally resists change as part of an evolutionary mechanism to ensure safety and survival. Resisting change can help someone maintain personal control during adverse circumstances and help them make sense of pending threats. However, change is inevitable, and resistance to change can also keep someone from achieving an optimal experience. Learning to be mindful and accepting the present moment without judgment is often helpful when adjusting to change.
How do I accept reality and move on?
Some things that can help you accept reality include acknowledging your feelings, using a mantra, practicing mindful exercises, observing your thoughts without judgment, and accepting situations you cannot control. You may also want to learn how to achieve a flow state when working toward goals. The flow experience occurs when you are so absorbed in completing a task or achieving a goal that you lose track of time. Each person typically has their own process to achieve flow, but many people find they can increase their intrinsic motivation, including in situations where they must accept significant change.
How do you accept a situation you cannot change?
Many people find it difficult to accept the things that are outside their control, but there are ways you can adapt your mindset toward acceptance:
- Observe your thoughts without judgment
- Acknowledge the reality of your situation and what things you can and cannot change
- Practice self-acceptance through mindfulness, imagery, or other relaxation techniques
- Think about the opportunities that this situation presents
- Give yourself the compassion you would extend to someone you love
- Live in the present moment
- Talk to a trusted friend or therapist to process the situation
Accepting things you cannot change is often a process rather than a destination. It will likely require continued work and reflection, as it is a biological desire for people to crave control over their lives. It might also be helpful to focus on improving self-confidence and self-awareness. Accepting things that cannot change often requires believing in your ability to adapt, which typically relies on confidence and self-esteem. Positive psychology, a field of mental health concerned with the study of how humans thrive, has revealed that many people find it challenging to develop the intrinsic motivation to adapt to change. People often search for ways to avoid change rather than a way to accept it.
How do you accept bad things in life?
Some strategies to help you accept negative things in life include acknowledging the situation, accepting your feelings, focusing on the things you can control, and reminding yourself that it is what it is. Accepting bad things often requires proactive action and effort. It is typically helpful to set clear goals regarding managing the impact of whatever bad thing has occurred. It is usually worthwhile to face the adversity, avoid self-consciousness, and remind yourself that you can overcome this challenging chapter. Often, a bad thing in life can be a stepping stone to much better circumstances.
How do you handle a difficult situation in life?
Here are a few tips that can help you handle difficult situations in life:
- Accept that there are things you cannot control
- Validate your feelings
- Journal
- Explore your thoughts without passing judgment on them
- Practice radical self-acceptance
- Focus on the things you can change
- Prioritize self-care
- Get enough sleep
- Create space for positivity
- Seek support from loved ones
It might be helpful to seek immediate feedback from friends and loved ones. They may support you for your own sake and help you find a way forward. You might also want to focus on avoiding self-conscious thoughts that might threaten your confidence. Overcoming a difficult situation in life can be challenging, but putting in the effort to do so is often intrinsically rewarding. You may find that your skill level has increased in areas necessary to overcome the adversity or that you are more capable of solving problems than you were before.
If you’re navigating a difficult life situation, it may be time to consider working with a licensed therapist. These professionals can help you proactively adopt healthy coping skills and process the situation, which can reduce the risk of developing mental health challenges later on.
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