The Cultural Meaning Of Failure: Exploring Failure In Different Cultures
Many people spend a significant amount of time chasing “success.” However, the definition of success often varies. Thus, the definition of “failure” can also be variable. Philosophers have examined the connection between failure, success, and society for years, and the definitions tend to vary by cultural region, family, and social group. Although people can define these terms for themselves, failure often has a social component. Explore the cultural definition of failure below, and consider speaking with a licensed therapist if you have trouble coping with failure.
What is failure? Learning about success and failure in culture
For some, failure might look like not meeting their goals at a certain point in time. Some might view themselves as failures, which can lead to low self-esteem, self-loathing, and fear of trying. Some people may be told they are failing their family or community by making choices outside social norms. Others might believe they are failing if they cannot compete with the lives of those they see in their community or online.
Failure is often highly social. Due to it frequently being seen as an “all-or-nothing” phenomenon, it can seem like the end of the world to those who experience it.
How does the meaning of failure vary in different cultures?
The meaning of failure can often be defined by what a person’s culture considers “success.” Below are a few ways failure can be defined worldwide.
Failure in North American culture
Western cultures often value high-paying and respected careers, financial success, materialism, and busyness. People in Western countries, like the US, might define success as having a big house, a nice car, a good job, and social recognition. Thus, failure might mean the opposite: having poor finances, a low-paying job, no social system, and an old car or not owning any form of transportation.
Being told that one is a failure for their life circumstances or difficulty in achieving these cultural markers of success can lead to low self-esteem and a sense of missing out on what “everyone else” seems to have.
Failure in European culture
European countries frequently have similar definitions of failure to North American countries. Some countries, like Germany, may be stricter about what constitutes success, especially in the workplace. In other countries, like France, individualism may be seen as an indicator of success.
Failure in Eastern cultures: Continuous improvement and learning
Individuals from Eastern cultures often see failure as an opportunity for change. If one technique doesn’t work, they may be more likely to try another. However, in some cases, this viewpoint may be applied to situations in which it isn’t healthy.
For example, someone’s parents might pressure them to consistently meet excessive goals, like learning many time-consuming skills and getting perfect grades at school. With significant pressure placed on personal skills and intelligence, some cultures might label people who do not achieve these standards “failures” or even distance them from society altogether.
Success and failure in smaller cultural groups
More isolated cultural groups, like Indigenous tribes, may also have their own definitions of failure and success. Some Indigenous groups may see success in a more collectivistic sense. It may be a family-oriented concept, or it might measure how someone contributes to the broader community or planet.
Other groups might focus more on personal strengths and abilities, rather than attributing labels like “successful” or “unsuccessful” to individuals.
Isolated social groups, like religious sects, often view failure in similar ways, although this type of failure might be determined by one’s adherence to a spiritual text or the perceived judgment of a god or deity.
Failure based on family culture and decision-making in social groups
Some families or social groups might have strict expectations for their members. For example, some families might want all children to work in the family business as adults or to carry on the family legacy in another way.
Social groups like sororities, large friend groups, or employees of a particular company may also face social pressure to succeed in certain areas. Members of these groups who deviate from the expectations of the rest of the group may fear more than just the label of “failure.” Failing could also mean losing their social system entirely or being disliked or looked down upon by others in the group.
Personal definitions of failure
People can develop their own definitions of failure and success. Instead of basing success on whether they’ve met a particular social norm, they may ask themselves questions like the following:
- Am I fulfilled by this?
- Does this make me happy?
- Does this align with my goals for the future?
- Am I acting within my values and moral code?
- Are my actions hurting me?
- Are my actions hurting someone else or my environment?
- How can I learn from my mistakes?
Although understanding what other people expect of you can help you maintain social connections, you are also allowed to define what success means to you, regardless of whether it fits within a cultural mold.
How to define success for yourself
To define success for yourself, consider a few key areas:
- Your values
- Your morals
- Your emotions and what makes you happy in the long term
- Your goals for your career, family, home, finances, health, and enjoyment
- Your current tools and abilities to get you to your goals
- Your support system
- A timeline for achieving your version of success
You might try goal-mapping exercises, journaling, or other forms of introspection to learn more about your mindset surrounding success. Think about how your goals might deviate from those that may be imposed on you by society, culture, or others in your life. Then, create a pros and cons chart about following that goal despite cultural stigma. You might find that the benefits outweigh the disadvantages of going against social norms.
How to stand up against cultural stigma and redefine success in your culture
If you are experiencing stigma about your personal choices or want to redefine what success means for your social groups and culture, the following steps may be helpful:
- Speak up when someone perpetuates harmful stereotypes about gender roles, financial success, lifestyle, or what a particular identity group “should” do
- Encourage younger family members to be themselves and develop their own definitions of success
- Follow what you know is right for you, regardless of external pressures, and make a point to be a role model to others in your community
- Speak up about how you’ve changed your view of failure
How to cope with being considered a failure by others
If you have gone against cultural norms to define your own version of success, you might experience criticism from your community and the people you love, which can be challenging. Taking accountability for your own mistakes can be commendable, but the way others view you might not always be accurate. Below are a few ways to cope with being considered a failure by others:
- Celebrate your achievements, regardless of how other people view them
- Be confident in your own definition of the good life, regardless of whether others agree
- Find friends and loved ones who support you and celebrate alongside you
- Journal about your experiences
- Explore past failures and how you coped with them
- Practice mindfulness to self-regulate your emotions
- Practice self-care regularly
- Create a list of positive descriptors of yourself and post it somewhere you can see it every day
- Spend time in environments that enrich you instead of judge you, such as a work environment that highlights your unique skills and personality
- Don’t base your life entirely on what you can do for others
Failure vs. growth: Ensuring continuous improvement and rejecting a culture of failure
The term “failure” is often considered controversial, as the concept of failure can be highly subjective. Instead, consider viewing failure as an opportunity for growth. If you aren’t satisfied with your performance, consider how you can do better next time.
You don’t have to be perfect, and making a mistake or not getting something right the first time doesn’t necessarily mean you’ve forever failed at that task and will never be able to succeed. A growth mindset can be one of the healthiest and most effective ways to cultivate resilience and move forward in life.
Finding mental health support
Failing or making a mistake can be challenging when you base your self-worth on your actions or how others treat you. In these cases, low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, and other challenges can arise. If you’re struggling with negative emotions or challenging beliefs about yourself, consider reaching out to a therapist. A mental health professional can help you redefine success and release the failure mindset.
Online therapy through a platform like BetterHelp can be a convenient and accessible way to seek professional support. People who are preoccupied with failure may worry that working with a therapist could make them seem “weak.” The ability to choose between phone, video, and live chat sessions with your provider and attend them from the comfort and safety of your home may relieve this fear.
Studies show that online therapy can be effective, especially in addressing challenges like burnout, which can develop when individuals push themselves too hard to achieve success. In a 2022 study, participants reported significantly reduced burnout symptoms after going through internet-based cognitive behavioral therapy.
Takeaway
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