How Can I Find An Intimacy Therapist Near Me?

Medically reviewed by Nikki Ciletti, M.Ed, LPC
Updated October 9, 2024by BetterHelp Editorial Team

Physical intimacy can come with a unique set of pitfalls, and even people in long-term relationships may face challenges that make sex more stressful than enjoyable. If you’re facing intimacy issues, discomfort, or mental health concerns that are affecting your sex life, you might benefit from intimacy therapy (also known as sex therapy). However, finding a therapist in your area may sometimes be challenging. Exploring resources available to you may be a helpful place to start your search. 

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An introduction to sex therapists

When you have trouble having or enjoying sex, you might be experiencing “sexual dysfunction.” Sexual dysfunction can be distressing and may put a strain on relationships when one or both partners’ needs aren’t being met. Intimacy therapists may address challenges like these and help you move forward. 

An intimacy therapist, also known as a sex therapist, is a mental health professional who specializes in human sexuality. The goal of sex therapy is often to help individuals and couples address their sexual concerns in a safe space. To do so, therapists may use techniques from different types of talk therapy, like mindfulness-based therapy or cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT).

Seeing a sex therapist for medical conditions

Sexual dysfunction can have various medical and non-medical causes. However, the role of a sex therapist is not to treat any underlying medical conditions, like hormonal imbalances, that might be causing sexual dysfunction. Rather, a qualified sex therapist may be able to support clients with the mental, behavioral, and emotional factors that might be contributing to sexual dysfunction. Addressing these areas may relieve symptoms that aren’t caused by a medical issue. 

How to seek support for a medical sex condition 

If you believe you may be experiencing a medical condition or physical symptoms, seek support from your primary care physician. They can let you know if you require testing or a referral to find treatment for these challenges. If you’re struggling with the emotional impacts of being diagnosed with a sex disorder, you might consider talking to a sex therapist. They can guide you through the mental health impacts and coping with this knowledge. 

The BetterHelp platform is not intended for any information regarding which drugs, medication, or medical treatment may be appropriate for you. The content provides generalized information that is not specific to one individual. You should not take any action without consulting a qualified medical professional.

Reasons you might choose to see a sex therapist

If sexual concerns are affecting you or your partner, an intimacy therapist may be able to help. With success rates as high as 90% for certain disorders, sex therapy may be effective for treating a wide range of concerns. Below, explore some of the most common reasons individuals and couples might decide to look for a sex therapist. 

Sex therapy for mismatched sex drives

Sex drive discrepancy (SDD) can happen when two partners have noticeably different levels of interest in sex. SDD may negatively affect sexual satisfaction, which can create stress in relationships. A sex therapist can help partners explore their sexual desires and find compromises that support a healthy relationship. 

Sex therapy for premature ejaculation 

Premature ejaculation happens when a partner with a penis ejaculates earlier than they or their partner wants during sexual activity. This symptom can happen for a variety of mental and emotional reasons, such as depression and anxiety. Sex therapy may involve exploring these causes and finding ways to manage them. 

A woman in an orange sweater sits on a couch and talks to the female therapist sitting across from her.
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Sex therapy for sexual trauma

For survivors of trauma, sex can sometimes be challenging and scary. Even years after the event, past sexual trauma may lead to a fear of sex, trouble with arousal, and other distressing symptoms. Sex therapy can offer a safe place to discuss these experiences and manage their effects on relationships. 

If you are experiencing trauma, support is available. Please see our Get Help Now page for more resources.

Sex therapy for compulsive sexual behavior

Compulsive sexual behavior includes sex-related thoughts and behaviors that are unwanted and hard to control. These urges may lead to feelings of stress and shame. A sex therapist may be able to help their clients change unhelpful thought patterns related to sex and learn healthy ways to manage their urges. 

Sex therapy for painful intercourse

Upwards of 75% of women will experience pain during sex at some point in their lives. This symptom can be due to mental factors like anxiety and stress, which may affect arousal and cause discomfort. Sex therapy that focuses on increasing comfort levels and making sex more enjoyable may help couples manage these challenges. 

Sex therapy for erectile dysfunction

Erectile dysfunction (ED) is when a partner with a penis cannot maintain an erection as often or as long as they or their partner want. Performance anxiety, low self-esteem, and fear of failure can be common causes of ED. A sex therapist might help clients manage ED by assisting them in improving their communication, developing confidence, and being more present during sex. 

Where can I find sex therapy near me?

If you’re experiencing challenges with intimacy, sexual desire, or other aspects of your sex life, a sex therapist may be able to help. However, finding a qualified provider in your area can sometimes be challenging. While searching the web for “intimacy therapist near me” might be enough for an initial search, you may consider finding a reputable therapist using the resources below.  

Get a referral

Outside referrals can be a useful way to start building a list of potential therapists. That said, be mindful of where your referrals are coming from. Getting referrals from professional sources may help you ensure that your therapist is qualified and licensed. 

Your primary care doctor

Before starting sex therapy, you may receive a physical exam to rule out any underlying medical conditions that can affect sex, like hormone issues or circulation problems. For this reason, you may start by talking to your primary care doctor. They may be able to suggest sex therapists who can help you with your specific concerns.

Your insurance company

Health insurance companies often maintain lists of in-network providers. If you have insurance, consider checking their online portal for sex therapists in your area. Before booking a session, you may also call your insurance provider to double-check your coverage, as directory listings may not always be up-to-date

Explore professional directories

Professional organizations are groups of people who all work in a specific field. These associations may be a helpful place to look for a sex therapist. Finding a therapist through a well-known organization may also help ensure your therapist is qualified to help you. 

Mental health provider networks

A wide range of professional associations cater to practicing counselors and therapists. Some examples include the American Psychological Association (APA), the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT), and the American Counseling Association (ACA). These networks often publish lists of members on their websites, which you can filter based on location and specialty. 

Professional organizations for sex therapists

If you struggle to find a provider through a more general network, more specific professional organizations may be worth considering. The American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists is one of the most well-known organizations for sex therapists in the US. Other options include the American Association of Couples and Sex Therapists and the Society for Sex Therapy & Research

Community health center support 

Community health centers (CHCs) and community mental health centers (CMHCs) are clinics that provide affordable mental and physical healthcare services to local communities. Some also offer services related to sexual health. While local clinics might not offer sex therapy specifically, they may be able to refer you to a provider in your area. If you don’t have a primary care doctor, a community clinic may also be able to help diagnose any medical conditions that might be affecting your sex life. 

A female therapist with a clipboard listens to her female patient sitting across from her during a therapy session.
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What if I can’t find a sex therapist? 

Sex therapy is often a personal experience, and finding a therapist you are comfortable with can be challenging. Even if local providers are available, they may not be covered by insurance, which can lead to high out-of-pocket costs. 

Online therapy may be a more accessible alternative. Platforms like BetterHelp for individuals and Regain for couples offer live therapy sessions starting at $65 per week, with the option to change therapists at any time. This flexibility may make finding a therapist you enjoy working with easier. In addition, you may be able to attend couples therapy online for the same cost as individual sessions instead of paying two separate fees. 

Research shows that online therapy may be an effective treatment for sex-related concerns. In a 2022 review, researchers analyzed data from 12 studies of internet-based psychological treatments for sexual dysfunction. They found that the online treatments led to significant improvements in male and female sexual functioning. 

Takeaway

Intimacy therapists (also known as sex therapists) are mental health professionals who help clients with sex-related challenges, such as painful sex and erectile dysfunction. If you’re not sure where to find a sex therapist in your area, you might start by asking your doctor for a referral. You may also be able to find local sex therapists through professional directories, your insurance company, or through a community health clinic. If you’re struggling to find an accessible therapist in your area, online therapy may be a helpful resource.
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