What To Do If You Fall For A Married Man

What do you do if you're in love with a married man?

If you’re in love with a married man, there are a few options to consider: 

• Reflect on why you’re in love with him and if it’s good for you or if you will feel guilty and unsure of yourself

• Leave the relationship, minimize or eliminate contact with him, and try to move on

• Set boundaries with him

• Invest your time in interpersonal relationships outside of the relationship

• Consider seeing other people, asking to be exclusive, or asking him to discuss an open marriage with his spouse

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, consider working with a therapist who can help you process your feelings. 

Can a happily married man fall in love with someone else?

Yes, someone can experience romantic attractions outside of a marriage, even if they’re happily married. However, people in healthy, happy, monogamous marriages actively work to maintain the health of their relationship and choose not to act on their feelings. If infidelity occurs, it usually indicates that there’s something else wrong. 

Is it a bad thing to fall in love with a married man?

Falling in love with a married man is not necessarily bad. However, acting on your feelings may lead to stress and emotional pain for everyone involved. 

Getting involved in an adulterous relationship could hurt you, both spouses, kids, extended family, and more people. Consider your options carefully before acting on your love for a married person. 

Can a man love his wife and girlfriend at the same time?

There are many different types of love, and it’s possible for someone to feel romantic love for two people simultaneously. In some cases, people turn outside of their marriage to get something—such as emotional intimacy or passion—that they’re not currently experiencing. 

Is it okay for a married man to text another woman?

Whether romantically texting another woman during marriage is okay depends on the boundaries established by the couple. For example, some couples may choose to have an open relationship or support texting that verges on flirtatious, whereas others may consider it a violation of trust.  

If a married man is texting a friend, co-worker, or someone else, it may be completely acceptable. However, texting that becomes very frequent, secretive, overly emotionally intimate, or late-night texting may cross boundaries. 

How do you tell a married man it's over?

If you decide to end your relationship, it’s generally a good idea to be clear and firm about your decision, tell him in person, and then stick with your choice. When breaking up, consider using “I” language to avoid placing blame on him, and using a calm voice. 

Before breaking up with him, it can be a good idea to discuss your concerns with trusted friends, family, or a therapist. They can help you think through your decision and how to tell your partner. 

How can you tell if a married man is pursuing you?

Some signs a married man may be pursuing you include: 

• Body language cues: He may make excessive eye contact, touch your arm, or lean towards you when he’s interacting with you. 

• Contact: If he’s interested in you, he might text you more frequently, start liking more of your content on social media, or confide in you more often.  

• Making time to be together: If he’s interested in an affair, he may invite you to do things together, without the presence of his spouse or friends. 

• Compliments: If he compliments your smile, physical features, haircut, or outfit, it might suggest that he is paying significant attention to your appearance. 

• Instinct: Some people can sense when someone is attracted to them. While this instinct might not always be correct, it can be a strong indicator. 

How you respond to these signs depends on your intentions. For example, you could confront him, distance yourself from him, or reciprocate his behavior. 

How can you let him go when you still love him?

If you’ve decided to break up with someone you still love, there are a few strategies that can help: 

• Remind yourself about why breaking up is a good idea

• Minimize your contact with him

• Acknowledge and accept your emotions 

• Practice self-care strategies

• Spend time with other people you care about 

• Get rid of things that remind you of him

• Lean on friends, family, or a licensed professional for emotional support

Leaving someone can be painful, especially if you still have romantic feelings for them. Even if you follow these tips, it can take time to recover from the loss of your relationship.

How do you emotionally detach from a married man?

Some tips that can help you emotionally detach from a married man include: 

• Stop contacting him, including seeing him in person, texting, following him on social media, or calling 

• Clearly communicate your intention to end the relationship

• Remove things in your home that remind you of him

• Invest your time in other interpersonal relationships

• Spend time practicing self-care

• Embrace some healthy distractions, like taking a class at your local community college or investing more time in work

• Date other people

These strategies can make it easier for you to emotionally distance yourself. But, if it’s difficult for you to take these steps or you still can’t stop thinking of him, it may be time to contact a licensed therapist. 

What should you do when the man you love is married?

If you’re in love with a man who is married, you have a few choices: 

• Distance yourself from him and focus on other relationships 

• Share your feelings with him and ask if the feelings are mutual

• Ask if he’s willing to leave his marriage or have an ethically non-monogamous relationship

• Reflect on why you’re interested in him

Loving a married person is not necessarily a bad thing, but it has a high potential to leave in hurt feelings if you act on your desire. Getting support from friends, family, or a licensed therapist can help you process your feelings and make the decision that’s right for you.