In Love Definition: Understand The Meaning

Medically reviewed by Nikki Ciletti, M.Ed, LPC
Updated October 10, 2024by BetterHelp Editorial Team

The experience of falling in love can create a profound connection between individuals. Love can be an intangible, multi-faceted phenomenon that transcends superficial definitions and taps into the core of what it means to be human. Love can mean more than romantic gestures or common interests. It can also involve understanding, respect, and emotional safety. In some cases, being in love consists of knowing another's weaknesses while accepting and cherishing them.

In the English language, the word love evolved from the old English “lufu” encompassing romantic sexual attraction, affection, friendliness, and the love of god. As it progressed into middle English, the meaning shifted to encompass phrases like “making love” (the pleasure between lovers) or “falling in love” (the act of attraction). Despite the dictionary’s definition of love, the feeling can be challenging to encapsulate in words. This emotion and state of being weaves a multitude of sentiments, actions, and experiences that may seem to defy simplistic explanations. It’s difficult to conceptualize the best picture of love, because love often transcends the confines of language, embodying deeply personal, instinctive, and intuitive feelings.

Understanding love may not necessarily be an intellectual endeavor but rather an exercise in trust and self-empowerment. It may encourage you to trust your feelings, embrace vulnerability, and connect profoundly with others. In this sense, delving into examples of love involves heartfelt acceptance of yourself and others. In its most accurate form, love is often a journey of self-discovery and self-affirmation.

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What does it mean to be in love?

Love, a profound emotion, comes with sentiments of joy, warmth, and affection. In one form, love means feeling a robust and deep-rooted connection that transcends physicality and materiality. Love may be a fleeting emotion and a profoundly human adaptation that spontaneously emerges. 

Love can also represent a playful side. Laughter, jokes, and light-hearted moments can form the fabric of a strong, lasting relationship. It's in the playful teasing, the smiles, and the quiet moments that love often shows its true colors. Love may not be just a feeling. Love can be a natural human urge to help people care for and respect one another. It's simultaneously an uncontrollable emotion and a conscious commitment, and there may not be a “wrong” example of what it means. 

The chemicals of love 

From a psychological perspective, love has been dissected through various lenses, with theories suggesting it amalgamates three fundamental components: intimacy, attraction, and commitment. Intimacy engenders closeness and connectedness, passion infuses the relationship with energy and excitement, and commitment anchors and safeguards the bond. 

When you fall in love, your brain experiences a euphoric surge of chemicals, creating a whirlpool of emotions that may be overwhelming. According to researchers, these facets of love are all stimulated by critical hormones in the body, including the following. 

Attraction: Dopamine

The attraction phase, often considered the first stage of love, is deeply intertwined with the neurotransmitter dopamine. This chemical is responsible for the enthusiasm and euphoric feelings often associated with new relationships and is also tied to feelings of optimism, energy, and a sense of well-being. 

Dopamine is released in response to rewarding activities, such as spending time with a new partner. This neurotransmitter can be crucial in establishing initial connections and bonds, as it motivates individuals to continue pursuing relationships that make them feel good. This phase, marked by a significant dopamine surge, forms the foundation upon which deeper, more lasting love can grow.

Passion: Testosterone and estrogen 

Passion, often a component of romantic love, is closely associated with the hormones estrogen and testosterone. Both hormones are crucial in emotional and physical expressions of love and attraction. Testosterone is often linked to sex drive and is present in both men and women. While typically associated with male virility, testosterone also influences female sexual desire and responsiveness. An increase in estrogen, on the other hand, has been found to increase sex drive in individuals with a gynecological reproductive system during ovulation. 

Commitment: Oxytocin and vasopressin

The commitment phase of love can be a vital stage, underpinned by the hormones oxytocin and vasopressin. Oxytocin, often referred to as the “love hormone,” fosters attachment, trust, and intimacy between partners. It is also known for strengthening bonds between a child and their parents. Released during moments of physical closeness, it strengthens emotional bonds and nurtures mutual affection. 

Contrarily, vasopressin is associated with long-term commitment and monogamous relationships. It can play a crucial role in fostering fidelity and cultivating a depth of commitment that anchors relationships. The value of these hormones lies in their ability to foster a deep-seated sense of commitment, enabling couples to overcome challenges together, enjoy happy experiences, and build a future rooted in mutual understanding and respect.

The meaning of love 

Love can be viewed as a complex interplay of emotions, behaviors, and beliefs associated with strong affection for another person. However, love has various definitions for different people, and its meaning can evolve. People may equate love with belonging, warmth, understanding, and acceptance. 

In one study, researchers found that healthy relationships characterized by love can reduce anxiety, improve mood, foster self-esteem, and promote overall mental well-being. Understanding and developing your relationship with the meaning of love can play a crucial role in emotional health and relational connectivity. 

Love, as an emotion and a state of being, can have vastly different meanings for different people. Perceptions and interpretations of love are often inspired and shaped by one’s history, past experiences, and traumas. For some, love might signify profound compassion, unwavering support, and emotional certainty; for others, it might mean sacrifice, resilience, or hurt. Such differences in perception are valid and deeply personal. How individuals interpret love often evolves, influenced by life circumstances, personal growth, and the evolving dynamics of relationships.

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Recognizing your unique relationship with love and being open to acknowledging that others may perceive it differently may foster more profound empathy and understanding in your interpersonal interactions. This recognition may also help you navigate your emotional landscapes better, enabling you to express and receive love in healthier ways that align with the highest version of yourself.  

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How to cultivate more love in your life 

Helpful practices to cultivate love and work through associated emotions include the following. 

Meditation

Meditation allows individuals to nurture a sense of inner peace, acceptance, and self-love, which may radiate outward in their interactions with others. Regular meditation can calm the mind, enabling one to experience love beyond the superficial layers of attraction and affection. It may also promote empathy and understanding, paving the way for deeper and more compassionate states of love.

Selfless actions

When you engage in acts of kindness or charity without expecting anything in return, you may embody the essence of love in its purest form. This selflessness may also deepen emotional intelligence and empathy, allowing you to experience profound connections with others, such as unconditional love. 

Working with the meaning of love

Understanding the different types of love may help you relate to it more effectively and better understand what it means to you. In ancient Greek philosophy, seven types of love are outlined, including: 

  • Eros (romantic love)

  • Philia (friendship)

  • Storge (familial love)

  • Agape (universal love, or devotion to god)

  • Ludus (playful love)

  • Pragma (committed love)

  • Philautia (self-love) 

By learning about these different forms of love, you may better comprehend your feelings, adapt your expectations, and deepen your ability to express and receive love in its many forms. By understanding love's multidimensional nature, you may be able to enrich your relationships and experiences. 

Signs you may be in love 

Recognizing genuine feelings of love can be a reflective and transformative journey. Below are some of the most common signs. 

Excitement 

Among the most common signs of being in love is a relentless sense of excitement and anticipation to see the object of your affection. Every moment spent apart may brim with a yearning for their company, and their mere presence may bring about a sense of happiness.

Yearning and passion 

When in love, familiar experiences often reflect a renewed sense of vibrancy, as if you’re seeing the world through a fresh lens. You may experience an inexplicable yearning to relive old experiences with them, as their presence infuses them with newfound excitement and meaning. 

Moreover, a powerful surge of passion often accompanies this profound emotional connection. This passion may come in various forms, not only related to physical attraction. It may also manifest as a profound interest in their opinions, a concern for their well-being, and a desire to provide them with a sense of certainty in the relationship. Love, in its essence, is a harmonious blend of affection, respect, and deep emotional bonding. 

Butterflies in the stomach

A fluttery sensation, often called “butterflies in the stomach,” can be a classic symptom of the early stages of love and infatuation. Try to acknowledge and assess these feelings rather than dismissing or ignoring them. Start by taking a moment to recognize what you're experiencing. Are you experiencing excitement, anxiety, or perhaps a mixture of both? Trust your emotions and instincts, as they can be a valid and significant part of your experience. 

While it may seem confusing or overwhelming initially, these emotions can often be the gateway to a more profound sense of certainty and understanding in a relationship. Practicing self-awareness and open communication can lead to a deeper connection with your feelings and those of your partner.

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Support options for love and sexual desire

Love and relationships can be confusing, and conflict may arise when dealing with intense emotions involving a beloved person. If you’re looking for support in understanding love, it may be helpful to talk to a therapist. You don’t have to have a mental illness to try therapy, and a therapist can guide you in setting healthy relationship goals. 

If you face barriers to in-person therapy, you can also try online therapy through a platform like BetterHelp for individuals or ReGain for couples. Online therapy offers a reachable way to discuss matters of the heart. The digital nature of the platform allows for flexible scheduling and the potential of connecting with therapists regardless of your location, ensuring you connect with someone who truly understands your unique perspective. In addition, you can choose between phone, video, or live chat sessions and select a time that works for you. 

In one study, researchers looked into the efficacy of online therapy and its ability to offer effective therapy services to individuals seeking support with love and relationships. In the study, their team found that online awareness, courage, and love (ACL) therapy was instrumental in reducing stress and enhancing relationship satisfaction among participants. This form of therapy emphasizes practicing self-awareness, bravery in confronting fears, and fostering love in its different aspects, from self-love to empathy for others. 

Researchers found that these elements, delivered in an online format, may have a significant impact on an individual's stress levels and relationship satisfaction. Furthermore, this online ACL therapy was also found to improve the quality of relationships. Participants reported a heightened sense of certainty, understanding, and intimacy in their relationships post-therapy. 

Takeaway

Love can be a complex and profound emotion that plays a vital role in our lives, fostering a sense of belonging and well-being. The idea of its depth, breadth, and manifestations may differ from person to person, yet its essence is often described in similar terms. Love can be a powerful and innate human trait that connects, motivates, and guides people through life's challenges. 

Love is often described as one of the most important aspects of being human. For this reason, it can be crucial to work with the meaning of love and develop a healthy relationship with this ineffable concept. If you’re struggling with love or relationships, consider reaching out to a therapist online or in your area for more personalized support.

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