Why Daughter Love Is Important: Effects Of Mothers' Parenting On Daughters

Medically reviewed by Dr. April Brewer, DBH, LPC
Updated October 14, 2024by BetterHelp Editorial Team

The relationship between mother and daughter is often one of the first and most impactful bonds a person will form in their lifetime. Studies have linked a person’s overall satisfaction in some of the most meaningful areas of life to their perceived relationship with their mother. In addition to having positive impacts on role satisfaction and self-esteem, a generally positive relationship between mother and child can buffer the negative effects of challenging life circumstances, including child poverty. Whether you are a mother, daughter, or both, working with a therapist online may help you with any parenting-related mental health challenges.

Learn how to improve your relationship with your daughter

The impact of mother-daughter relationships

In 2016, an investigative study revealed a strong link between women’s current role satisfaction and self-esteem and their early perceptions of their relationship with their mothers. The results of the study showed enhanced self-esteem and role satisfaction in women who felt loved and accepted by their mothers overall. 

The study also revealed an apparent lack of correlation between a mother’s role choice and her daughter’s. Put simply, a woman whose mother chose the role of being a homemaker will not necessarily choose to become a homemaker herself. Typically, a woman’s role choice in adulthood, whether it be career-centric, family-oriented, or non-career work-oriented, tends to be more contingent on the overarching message they received from their mother growing up.

The influence of early relationships on a daughter’s love

By studying the growth and development of children’s brains, researchers are beginning to see the lasting effects of the presence of warm maternal love from birth. Research shows that a positive relationship with a mother from the earliest stages of life can buffer the negative effects of certain challenging or difficult life circumstances.

Additionally, studies show an early bond between mother and daughter can lead to the development of a secure attachment style later in life. A secure attachment style is generally characterized by the ability to control emotions, the ability to seek emotional support, and the ability to feel comfortable alone. 

Typically, the attachment style a child develops with their parents dictates their attachment style in future relationships. The development of a secure attachment style in early childhood has the potential to positively impact both friendships and romantic relationships in a person’s future. 

How parental engagement impacts daughter love and education

Another study conducted over the course of a decade concluded that parental engagement in a child’s education outside of school generally had positive impacts in the areas of literacy, math, and social-emotional skills. Key findings revealed the potential importance of familial involvement in the development of a child’s reading and math skills. 

While this particular study focused on family involvement as a whole, these findings can apply to any family unit that includes a maternal figure. Typically, a child’s interest in education can contribute heavily to success later in life. 

When it comes to education, a mother’s involvement in her daughter’s early learning and development outside of school can play a largely positive role in her overall success later in life. 

Navigating gender-based difficulty

Research conducted by therapist and renowned mother-daughter relationship coach Dr. Rosjke Hasseldine explored the existence of the many hidden controversies that exist between mothers and daughters. 

In a recent article, Dr. Hasseldine describes common difficulties between mothers and daughters to feel heard by each other. Additionally, she discusses the negative effects of “mother-blaming,” which is typically characterized by the attribution of all personal problems to a mother figure. 

Due to the intense complexity and outside societal influences that can factor into these particular difficulties between mothers and daughters, seeking individual talk therapy for additional guidance on building and maintaining a positive parental relationship with a daughter can be helpful.

The benefits of mother-daughter love

When it comes to general science and research on relationships between parents and children, positive, high-quality, loving relationships tend to lead to positive effects in the following areas:

  • General success
  • Self-esteem and self-adequacy 
  • Education
  • Emotional control
  • Social competence
  • Mental health

How parental mental health affects mother-daughter relationships

There tends to be exceedingly high pressure placed on the significance of a mother raising a daughter “perfectly”. It can be important to remember that parenting often comes with many challenges, and there may be no one correct way to be a mother. 

What usually positively affects relationships between mothers and daughters is the presence of mutually understood love and acceptance. It can be crucial to keep in mind that the quality of a parent-child relationship can be quite reliant on the mental well-being of the parent. 

Mental health concerns in parents

Parents who experience symptoms of depression, anxiety, or other mental illnesses may notice the symptoms of these conditions affect their quality of parenting. For this reason, it may be beneficial for any parent experiencing these types of challenges to participate in regular talk therapy. 

Learn how to improve your relationship with your daughter

Seeking help through online therapy

There can be endless challenges and roadblocks that tend to come with mothering a daughter. A mother’s own mental well-being often plays a critical role in building and maintaining a positive relationship with a daughter. 

Improving mother-daughter relationships with online therapy

When parenting, hectic schedules can make it especially difficult to stay on top of regular therapy and mental wellness. In such cases, online therapy may offer flexibility that regular in-person therapy typically cannot. 

Online therapy can provide a safe environment to open up about the challenges of parenting, as well as individual concerns regarding parenting style, personal mental health, and other factors that can affect overall mothering performance.

Effectiveness of online therapy

According to this study, the effectiveness of online therapy is typically equal to that of in-person therapy. Due to the significant role that personal mental well-being usually plays in nearly every aspect of life, online therapy can be especially effective in providing guidance in the matters of mothering and parenting overall. 

Takeaway

Based on extensive psychological research, the bond between a mother and daughter tends to play a very important role in the lives of both parents and children. A maternal relationship characterized by acceptance, understanding, comfort, and support can set a child or daughter up for general success in life. 

Additionally, it can be important to consider one’s own mental health in matters of parenting. Often, participating in therapy, whether in person or online, or finding a support system composed of other mothers or parents can be very helpful in maintaining good mental health, which typically contributes to higher-quality parenting.  

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