Parenting Articles

Medically reviewed by Julie Dodson, MA, LCSW

Parenting

Parenting is often considered a rewarding experience, but it can present significant challenges to a person’s mental health and overall well-being. According to the Pew Research Center, 62% of parents say that parenting is more difficult than they expected. Parents and caregivers often have to consider their children’s physical, emotional, social, and cognitive development from the time they are babies to the time when they enter adulthood—and often beyond. The responsibilities of parenting can sometimes lead parents to put their own needs aside, which can affect them emotionally and physically. Below, we’ll discuss various parenting styles, challenges that parents may face, and ways that parents can improve their own mental health while they’re caring for their children. 

Parenting styles

There are many different ways to raise children, but many researchers focus on: permissive, authoritative, neglectful, and authoritarian styles. However, parenting sometimes can’t be neatly placed into a category, as there are times when parents might adapt to their children’s evolving needs at different stages in life. For example, there may be times when parents find that they have to set firm boundaries, whereas at other times they may need to allow their children more autonomy and freedom to make their own choices. 

Below are the four main parenting styles and the possible outcomes they tend to encourage fin children. 

Permissive Parenting

Permissive parenting is a parenting style in which people may overindulge their children. They may see themselves more as peers rather than role models, and they tend to worry about upsetting their children. Children of permissive parents may not have many rules or guidelines, which often allows the children to do as they please. 

Caregivers using permissive parenting are often too reluctant to impose boundaries on their kids. This lack of discipline can lead to negative consequences down the road. Children may not be used to facing the consequences of not following rules outside the home. However, they may be more likely to speak their mind and act creatively when compared to children who grow up with more rigid rules.

Authoritarian Parenting

Caregivers who practice authoritarian parenting tend to be strict and set firm punishments. They typically expect obedience without explaining the rationale for the rules they set in place. Their children may experience low self-esteem and eventually rebel against their parents. However, some children in this situation end up being highly disciplined and excelling in various areas of life. 

Uninvolved/Neglectful Parenting

Caregivers who have an uninvolved parenting style tend to not set rules or boundaries for their children. This tends to be different from permissive parenting in that the parents don’t worry about pleasing their children; instead, they tend to be uninterested. In these cases, the parents may act this way as a result of mental health challenges they’re experiencing. 

In terms of outcomes, the children of parents who practice uninvolved parenting may experience problems with self-esteem and other mental health challenges, but there are treatments available for both the parents and their children. Parents who seek treatment for their mental health may find that they experience not only improvement in their condition but also stronger relationships with their children. 

Authoritative Parenting

Some researchers believe that authoritative parenting is the most beneficial of these four parenting styles. Authoritative parents tend to establish boundaries, but they typically explain the reason for the rules they set in place. Also, they may be willing to negotiate and collaborate with their children when it comes to setting goals as well as the potential consequences for violating those parameters. 

The children of parents who practice authoritative parenting tend to manage negative emotions successfully. They also tend to be confident and independent, believing they can achieve their goals on their own.

Self-Care For Parents

Parenting is a full-time job, and there are rarely any breaks. It can be challenging for parents to know how to help their children, and research shows that many parents experience mental health challenges of their own. One study published in the journal Adversity and Resilience Science found that more than 7% of children had at least one caregiver experiencing mental health challenges. 

To be the best parent you can be, it may help to implement self-care practices into your weekly routine. Research shows that self-care can have important implications for mental health and overall well-being. Self-care can include practices to enhance your physical health, such as exercise, nutrition, and better sleep hygiene, as well as mental health practices, such as mindfulness, meditation, and deep breathing. These practices may not only improve your health but also equip you to be a better parent.

Getting Help With Parenting

In addition to using self-care strategies, you may benefit from speaking with a licensed therapist about parenting. A therapist may be able to help you navigate specific challenges you’re facing, whether they’re related to parenting, mental health, or other concerns. 

If the demands of parenting make it difficult to find time for traditional in-office therapy, you might consider online therapy, which numerous studies have found to be just as effective as in-person therapy. One study in 2017 found that online therapy is effective for anxiety, depression, phobias, and substance use, among other mental health challenges.

With online therapy, you can connect with a licensed therapist from the comfort of your own home via audio, videoconferencing, or live chat at a time that works for you. You can also contact your therapist at any time through in-app messaging, and they’ll respond as soon as they can. This may be helpful if you have questions about parenting or other topics in between sessions. 

Takeaway

Parenting can present significant challenges that arise at all stages of life, even when children become adults. If you’re experiencing challenges as a parent, know that you don’t have to face them alone. You may benefit from speaking with a licensed counselor about your specific parenting concerns or anything else you’re facing. With BetterHelp, you can be matched with a therapist who has experience helping people navigate the challenges of parenting while taking care of their mental health. Take the first step toward getting support as a parent and reach out to BetterHelp today.