How To Find A Therapist For Personality Disorders: Resources And Strategies

Medically reviewed by Laura Angers Maddox, NCC, LPC
Updated July 31, 2024by BetterHelp Editorial Team

Personality disorders are severe mental illnesses that cause difficulty in relationships, identity, and self-care. People with these conditions may partake in risky behaviors and harm themselves and others through maladaptive behavioral patterns. However, personality disorders can be managed with therapy and other resources. If you’re living with a personality disorder, you’re not alone, and a vast range of coping mechanisms and professional support options can be accessed when you are aware of where to look. 

Getty/AnnaStills
Is A Personality Disorder Affecting Your Life?

Understanding personality disorders

According to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), approximately 9.1% of the US adult population has a personality disorder. However, despite this relatively high prevalence, finding the right therapist for personality disorders can be overwhelming for some people. To understand how to find treatment, it may first be helpful to understand the symptoms of personality disorders. 

Personality disorders can affect an individual's thoughts, emotions, and behaviors, often hindering daily functioning. Each disorder is distinct, with its own specific characteristics and challenges. Personality disorders are often subcategorized into three clusters:

  • Cluster A: Paranoid personality disorder, schizotypal personality disorder, and schizoid personality disorder
  • Cluster B: Antisocial personality disorder, histrionic personality disorder, borderline personality disorder, and narcissistic personality disorder.
  • Cluster C: Obsessive-compulsive personality disorder, dependent personality disorder, and avoidant personality disorder.

Some of these disorders can overlap or coexist with others. Each personality disorder has its own diagnostic criteria and treatment approaches. Understanding these distinctions can help you locate a therapist who is well-versed in the specific disorder you or your loved one may be facing.

Personality disorders are often accompanied by other mental health conditions, including depression, anxiety, and substance use disorders (previously known as “substance abuse disorders”). This overlap can make diagnosis and treatment more complex, underscoring the benefits of a mental health professional who offers comprehensive care.

Treatment approaches and modalities

Different therapeutic approaches can be effective in treating personality disorders. Understanding these modalities may help you make an informed choice when selecting a therapist.

Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT)

Dialectical behavior therapy focuses on teaching skills for emotional regulation, distress tolerance, mindfulness, and interpersonal effectiveness. Therapists trained in DBT can offer structured support and practical tools for managing symptoms. Research suggests that DBT can be helpful for borderline personality disorder, as the modality was initially developed to treat personality disorders like BPD by Marsha Linehan, a psychologist who also lives with BPD and developed the modality based on her experiences.  

Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT)

Cognitive-behavioral therapy is a goal-oriented method that aims to identify and replace negative thinking and behavior patterns. This modality can be beneficial for various personality disorders, helping individuals challenge maladaptive thoughts and develop coping skills. CBT is a thoughts and emotions-based treatment. Some people, especially those with trauma, may find trauma-informed CBT or modalities like internal family systems (IFS) and eye movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy (EMDR) more helpful.

Psychodynamic therapy

Psychodynamic therapy explores past experiences and their impact on current behaviors and relationships. This approach gives clients insight into underlying psychological processes that may contribute to their symptoms.

Group therapy

Group therapy provides a supportive environment where people can connect with others facing similar challenges. Individuals may receive feedback, social support, and connections in a group setting. While not every therapist may offer these modalities, knowing about them can help you determine which approach may be most helpful for your specific needs.

Getty/Vadym Pastukh

Factors to consider when choosing a therapist

Aside from specific treatment approaches, several other factors can influence your choice of therapist. These factors may include:

  • Credentials and specialization: A therapist should have a license to practice and, preferably, advanced training in treating personality disorders.
  • Therapeutic approach: A mental health professional may use various therapy modalities. While a degree in clinical psychology or social work may offer training in multiple modalities, specialized training or experience in treating personality disorders can offer a more specific approach. 
  • Personal connection: The therapeutic relationship between you and your therapist can influence treatment outcomes. Finding a therapist with whom you are comfortable may allow for open communication and trust.
  • Accessibility and affordability: When choosing a therapist, factors like location, availability of virtual sessions, insurance coverage, and fees may also impact your decision.

These areas may help you assess potential therapists and find a suitable match. You might try a few sessions to determine a fit. However, you have the freedom to look for other therapists if you don’t fit with one. Because therapists are people, they have unique personalities, and some providers may not fit the communication style or personality you’re looking for. Like any social process, finding someone you connect with may take time. 

Where to find the right therapist for you

Finding the right therapist can be a personal process that may take time. Still, there are several options you can explore to connect with potential therapists, including but not limited to the following: 

  • Referrals from your healthcare provider: Your primary care physician or a mental health professional may provide recommendations for therapists who specialize in personality disorders.
  • Online directories: Various online platforms offer extensive databases of licensed therapists. You can filter your search based on location, specialty, insurance coverage, and preferred modality.
  • Support groups: Support groups for individuals with personality disorders can also connect you with people who have had positive experiences with their therapists

Once you've identified potential therapists, you may schedule consultations or initial sessions to learn about their approach and determine if they are a fit for you.

Evaluating mental health professionals

The right therapist may not be the first you meet, which can be normal. Evaluating potential mental health professionals based on your unique needs, preferences, and treatment goals may help you find the right match. Below are a few ways to evaluate therapists:

  • Have an initial consultation: Some therapists offer a free or low-cost initial consultation. This meeting may be an opportunity to discuss your concerns and treatment goals and ask about their experience with personality disorders.
  • Evaluate their communication style: Observing the therapist's communication style may ensure a sense of comfort and mutual understanding. Effective therapists often listen actively, offer constructive feedback, and foster a supportive atmosphere.
  • Consider the treatment plan: Understanding the proposed treatment plan can clarify its structure and objectives. A clear plan may help clients monitor progress and make adjustments. Knowing how success is evaluated and their methods for ongoing assessment can also be helpful.
  • Build trust and rapport: Trust and rapport can be essential elements in therapy. Knowing you are safe, understood, and respected by the therapist can aid in building a strong therapeutic relationship.

Finding the right therapist often involves patience and perseverance. However, maintaining open communication and viewing therapy as a team effort may contribute to achieving positive change.

Building a therapeutic relationship

A strong therapeutic relationship may make treatment more effective. Knowing you are understood and supported by your therapist can positively influence therapy outcomes. Below are ways to cultivate a positive therapeutic relationship:

  • Open communication: Honest communication of thoughts, feelings, and experiences may benefit therapy. This openness can enable your therapist to fully understand your needs and adapt their strategies.
  • Active participation: Participating in sessions and practicing skills between appointments may enhance the therapeutic process. Your consistent participation can be a factor in achieving therapeutic goals.
  • Feedback: Communicating feedback about the therapy process may help your therapist tailor their approach. A responsive therapist can consider your input and adjust their methods accordingly.

As you navigate the therapy process, you may encounter challenges or setbacks. Progress may not be linear, but with a supportive and collaborative therapeutic relationship, you can work towards achieving improved mental health and well-being.

Long-term strategies and support

Managing a personality disorder may involve ongoing support and long-term strategies. The following methods may help you maintain progress and continue your journey toward better mental health:

  • Continued therapy: Regular therapy sessions, even after significant progress, may maintain stability and prevent relapse. Consider discussing the frequency and duration of ongoing sessions with your therapist.
  • Support systems: Building a strong support system of friends, family, and support groups can be beneficial. Having people who understand and support your journey can provide additional strength and encouragement.
  • Self-care: Prioritizing self-care practices that promote overall well-being can aid in managing symptoms and improving overall quality of life. Self-care might include maintaining a healthy lifestyle, managing stress, and participating in activities that bring joy and fulfillment.
A woman in an orange sweater leans forward while sitting on the couch and talking to the female therapist who sits across from her.
Getty/FatCamera
Is A Personality Disorder Affecting Your Life?

Alternative support options 

Finding in-person therapy can be challenging when individuals face barriers like financial stress or a busy schedule. For those managing personality disorders, online therapy through a platform like BetterHelp can provide the dual benefits of finding an affordable therapist and ensuring scheduling compatibility. The reduced costs of online therapy sessions make ongoing treatment more feasible for some, while flexible scheduling allows clients to integrate therapy into their lives without disrupting daily activities, promoting adherence to treatment plans.

While time-intensive and costly therapies for personality disorders are effective, scaling them up poses significant challenges. Recent studies indicate online interventions are emerging as a viable alternative to in-person treatment, with researchers highlighting several benefits, particularly scalability. Although under-researched, reviews suggest that the initial results of these online treatments are promising for managing personality disorders.

Takeaway

With ongoing progress in technology and a heightened focus on personalized care, there is hope for individuals managing personality disorders. While the healing process can present challenges, appropriate support and resources can provide positive changes and a better quality of life.

Living with a personality disorder can be challenging, but a therapist can help you navigate and manage your symptoms. As you evaluate potential therapists, considering the factors that will contribute to a strong therapeutic relationship can help you find the right match. Reach out to a provider online or in your area to get started.

Work through personality disorder symptoms
The information on this page is not intended to be a substitution for diagnosis, treatment, or informed professional advice. You should not take any action or avoid taking any action without consulting with a qualified mental health professional. For more information, please read our terms of use.
Get the support you need from one of our therapistsGet started