Mental Health And Relationship Problems: I Have No Sex Drive

Having a satisfying sex life can be an important part of many people’s mental health. A healthy sex life can relieve stress, help us bond with our partners, and more. If your sex drive has recently taken a turn for the worse, this can have a serious impact on your relationships and it can be crucial to get to the bottom of what’s going on. 

Maybe you are suddenly experiencing low sexual desire, a complete lack of interest in physical intimacy, or perhaps you have always had an aversion to sexual intimacy. This article aims to explore the variety of psychological factors that could be reducing your sexual desire and ability to achieve sexual arousal, as well as looking at potential solutions ranging from online therapy to others.    

Symptoms of low libido and relationship challenges

Your libido or your “sex drive” is a complex process influenced by factors ranging from biological to psychological and social. As libido levels vary from person to person, it can be difficult to identify when low sexual desire is abnormal or causing strain on your relationships.

Hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD) is the medical term that refers to different forms of reduced sexual desire. The term "hypoactive" denotes a decrease in both behavioral and physical activity.

Men and women often experience similar symptoms of HSDD including decreased interest in sex of all forms, including masturbation. HSDD is characterized by an enduring and recurring lack of interest in sexual activity, sexual thoughts, and sexual stimulation, leading to heightened stress. This clinically noteworthy stress may manifest as sadness, a feeling of grief, and emotions of inadequacy, loss, and frustration. 

Sexual desire often fluctuates throughout our lives. For example, it is common for women to experience decreased sexual desire when going through huge life changes such as pregnancy or menopause.

Low libido or low sex drive can affect the relationship. You may feel guilty for not being able to fulfill the relationship’s sexual needs. In addition, your partner may feel sexually unfulfilled and may also have the feeling that they are less desirable.

Causes of low sex drive

There are a variety of psychological, physical, and social factors that can serve as potential culprits of low sex drive. Men and women often have overlapping symptoms and causes, but there can be some differences. 

Some causes of low sex drive in men and women can include:

• Relationship issues
• Relationship stagnating or feelings diminishing over time
• Stress, possibly related to financial problems or troubles at work
• Family demands
• Mental health decline
• Drug and alcohol use, as well as certain medications 
• Tobacco use
• Physical health such as obesity or diabetes, or illnesses such as cancer
• Growing older
• Sexual orientations such as asexuality or demisexuality
• History of sexual trauma or abuse

Men and women may have different causes of low sex drive

There are some causes of low sex drive that primarily apply to men. They may include:

• Issues regarding sexual function, such as erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, and retrograde ejaculation
• Low testosterone
• Men are more likely to suffer from performance anxiety

There are also some causes of low sex drive that primarily impact women, such as:

• Contraception
• Sexual pain, sometimes linked to endometriosis
• Menopause, hormonal problems

With the variety of factors impacting men and women, you may need to figure out the root cause of present issues in order to better improve your sexual health.

Treatment options

When facing a loss of libido, you may be worried that there are no solutions and your relationship will be ruined.  However, a variety of treatment options are available. 

Some potential remedies for loss of libido may include:

• Relationship counseling
• Medications to treat vaginal dryness or erectile dysfunction
• Hormone replacement therapy (HRT)
• Antidepressants
• Changing medications

How therapy can help with low libido issues and other relationship problems

Many of us might not feel comfortable sharing personal details about our sex lives with others. Sexual problems in a relationship can often be a source of shame or embarrassment, even though this is often a result of social conditioning and there is nothing to be ashamed of if you are experiencing these issues. 

While we might feel at ease leaning on our friends and family for advice on certain subjects, we often find sexual details too vulnerable to divulge to the people we know. This reluctance to openly address these issues often causes sexual problems in relationships to spiral and get worse. However, there can be a solution. 

Therapy, including online therapy, can potentially help those experiencing these issues. Perhaps your underlying issues regarding your sexual problems are related to your experiences of past trauma or abuse, or due to communication or other issues in your relationship. 

Online therapy for overcoming the impact of low libido on mental health

Online therapy can be an effective resource for working through these traumatic experiences in your life in a safe environment, such as that of your own home. Therapy can also help with increasing confidence and improving communication skills with your partner. Additionally, a licensed professional can offer coping mechanisms to help you overcome the adverse impacts of low libido on your mental health.