Self Esteem Articles

Medically reviewed by April Justice, LICSW

Self-esteem can be seen as how we feel about who we are. It’s usually a reflection of the confidence that we have in ourselves and our ability to navigate our lives successfully. Those who have a healthy level of self-esteem tend to be less likely to take poor treatment from others and understand that they deserve good things. On the other hand, individuals with low self-esteem might experience regular self-doubt and accept mistreatment from other people. Here, we’ll discuss the importance of self-esteem in greater detail and explore how you might be able to boost your own. For professional guidance in improving your self-esteem, consider working with a therapist online or in person.

How self-esteem develops

Self-esteem normally starts developing during childhood and continues to be molded throughout one’s lifetime. 

A child who grows up in a healthy environment is often rewarded for doing their best. They may be encouraged to succeed in a wide array of academic, social, and athletic situations. Even when they make a mistake or fail at something, they’re usually reminded that it isn’t a reflection of their worth. In essence, those around them may treat them with compassion and instill a sense of confidence within them, so the child grows up believing they can achieve anything they set their mind to. 

In situations where children are neglected or even abused*, they might be told that they’re worthless or won’t do well in life. The child may take these words to heart and start to believe them. Instead of seeing themselves as a capable individual, they may view themselves through a negative lens, thinking that they don’t have much to offer to the world or people around them.

Relationships with parents, friends, teachers, coaches, and peers can all affect a person’s self-esteem. Some of these relationships may be more impactful, depending on the stage of life a person is in. For example, someone who is rejected by their friend group as a teenager may be more impacted than someone cast out by their friend group in their 40s. 

Every situation varies, and people might still respond differently to similar life circumstances. When considering someone’s sense of self-esteem, it can be important to consider the various factors that could be at play. 

*If you or a loved one is witnessing or experiencing any form of abuse, please know that help is available. You can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline anytime at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).

Negative impacts of low self-esteem

Low self-esteem doesn’t always stem from abuse. Sometimes, it can arise from other contributors, like bullying, internalized messages from the media, rejection, and so on. Regardless of the cause, low self-esteem can become a serious concern if left unaddressed. 

Those who develop low self-esteem in childhood may carry this feeling into adulthood, finding that it affects them at work, at school, or in their relationships. Some of the most common effects of low self-esteem can include depression, loneliness, shame, anxiety, or anger. 

A person might regularly feel unhappy with themselves and become their own biggest critic, potentially worsening their feelings over time. They may not get into a relationship, possibly believing that they don’t deserve love, or accept abuse in relationships, thinking they deserve it. When life doesn’t go their way, it may take them longer to recover, and they might avoid going after opportunities for fear of failure or not being perfect. 

Raising your self-esteem

Individuals with low self-esteem don’t have to feel that way forever. It can be possible for people to improve their sense of self-worth and start believing in themselves again. They may need to do some inner reflection, noting the things they like about themselves. Journaling can be useful in this instance and provide a place to write down one’s talents, abilities, and positive qualities. Putting things down on paper may also be useful in identifying internalizing behavior patterns, which otherwise may go unnoticed.

Taking risks and going after opportunities, even when there's a risk of failure, can also make a difference. As people move out of their comfort zones and see that they can accomplish what they set their minds to, they may gain confidence and reject their self-defeating thoughts. 

Taking little steps each day can add up over time, leading to positive outcomes in the long term. Self-esteem can fluctuate, and it can be normal to have a bad day now and then. What matters may be staying committed to the process even when it becomes challenging.

Benefits of online therapy

Having a healthy sense of self-esteem can be vital to your well-being. If you’re struggling with self-worth or confidence, talking to an online therapist could make a difference. With an online therapy platform like BetterHelp, you can connect with a therapist from your home or anywhere else you have an internet connection. Using phone calls, video conferences, or online chat, you can explore the underlying causes of your low self-esteem and find ways to elevate your self-worth.

Effectiveness of online therapy

According to research, self-esteem concerns may be successfully addressed with resources like online therapy. In one study, researchers examined an online talk therapy intervention and found that it was generally effective in managing and treating several different types of mental health disorders. Those who participated in the intervention normally reported fewer feelings of loneliness and increased self-esteem. These results were still maintained at a six-week follow-up, demonstrating the potential long-term efficacy of virtual interventions.

Takeaway

Self-esteem can play a crucial role in your health and how you interact with the world around you. While most people may experience feelings of insecurity from time to time, a persistent sense of unworthiness could signal a more serious issue. You can learn more about boosting your self-esteem by browsing through the articles contained in this section. Additionally, if you’d prefer to get more information one-on-one from a knowledgeable professional, you might consider speaking with an online therapist through the BetterHelp platform.