Four Ways To Reduce Holiday Stress
For some people, the holiday season has come to represent more stress than joy. If you’re dreading seasonal obligations or unpleasant holiday gatherings, read on for tips on reducing stress during the holidays. After all, you deserve to have a peaceful and fun holiday season, too.
Why are the holidays so stressful?
There are lots of different factors that cause individuals to experience holiday stress. Some are in charge of hosting a holiday gathering and feel overwhelmed trying to plan everything and please their friends and family. Others gather with family they don’t get along with and have to brace themselves for frustrations and fights between other family members. Some feel most stressed about money and finances, with demands on their bank accounts around every corner. Still, others lack the close family or community they’d like or have traumatic memories from holidays past, leading them to associate the season with loneliness and the stress of disconnection. Finally, even just the traffic, the expectations, holiday commitments, the weather, the busyness, or the stress other people exude can get to some of us.
If you are experiencing trauma, support is available. Please see our Get Help Now page for more resources.
Tips for better mental health this holiday season
The first rule of reducing holiday-related stress is to practice mindfulness and focus on the things you do have control over: your own thoughts and behaviors. Let’s take a look at some tips to help you reframe and manage these things that are within your sphere of influence.
1. Set boundaries
While the traditions and expectations of others can make setting boundaries more difficult during the holidays, it’s also a time when doing so may be more important than ever. Setting limits to safeguard yourself and preserve your mental health and physical well-being at this time of year can be a major step toward reducing stress.
You might set boundaries in relation to:
Finances: If you have hard limits on how much you feel comfortable spending on shopping, gifts, travel, food, dinners, etc., you can express those to others. You’re completely within your rights to opt out of that fourth white elephant gift exchange, or to decline an out-of-state invitation due to the cost of plane tickets.
Time: If yet another holiday obligation pops up that’s going to stretch you too thin, you can safeguard your time and energy by declining or offering a less time-consuming alternative.
Conversation: When getting together with family for the holidays, conflicts and arguments can sometimes arise around specific conversation topics. If Thanksgiving dinner always ends up tense and angry because some families have opposite political views or want to dredge up old feuds, you can let the group know that you personally won’t be engaging in discussions on X, Y, or Z topics. You can also simply not participate if those topics arise.
Energy: If you’re hosting or staying in someone else’s home during the holidays, you may need to set limits on social time so you can preserve some time for yourself. This type of boundary could also apply if you get more invitations than you’d like to accept. It’s okay to take alone time when you need it
These are just a few examples. If you feel uncomfortable with some aspect of what’s being asked of you during the holiday season, it’s your right to draw a healthy line. While some people may not like, or resist your boundaries, you can take comfort in the fact that you’re doing what’s healthiest for you—and that enjoying the holidays within your limits is an authentic, caring way to approach this time.
2. Embrace imperfection
Many people find the holidays stressful because of all the pressure. Whether it’s put on us by ourselves or others, it can be overwhelming to try and live up to impossible standards of perfection. Holiday-themed movies and social media may both play a role in making us feel like a certain holiday event has to look perfect and go off without a hitch in order to be worthwhile or enjoyable. To combat this pressure, first don’t forget that perfection is impossible. What you see in movies or on Instagram is often not true to life, and releasing the idea that a perfect holiday season, party, dinner, etc. is required or even achievable may help you feel calmer going into it.
3. Keep up healthy routines
Once the busy holiday season is in full swing, it can be hard to stick to healthy habits and routines. Eating well can be difficult when your dinner consists of party hor d'oeuvres and holiday biscuits a few nights a week, or when you’re too busy to put together something for yourself. Sticking to an exercise routine can be hard when your calendar is fully booked with holiday parties and tasks. Finding time to read, sleep, meditate, eat fresh fruits and vegetables, or otherwise practice self care can be a challenge when you’re traveling or hosting guests. Maintaining any of these routines may take extra planning or commitment, but keeping your body physically healthy can help you keep your stress levels in check.
One study found that levels of cortisol—the stress hormone—can be reduced through a healthy diet, and other research shows that even 20–30 minutes of aerobic exercise can produce calming effects for up to several hours. While keeping up with your healthy routines can be harder during the holidays, the payoff in terms of stress relief can be significant. You can try to plan ahead or create a to do list to ensure you have a break in your schedule to do your healthy routines. However, try to avoid increasing your stress levels even more by worrying about not eating well or exercising enough. Making time for these things as much as you can is all you can ask of yourself.
4. Do good
Many people feel more inclined to donate, volunteer, connect, and do good in other ways around the holidays. While it’s worth it to help make the world a better place, altruistic acts can also help you de-stress. One study found that certain charitable acts can actually lower levels of cortisol, the stress hormone. Giving to or volunteering with your favorite charity, bringing baked goods to an elderly neighbor, or even offering a kind word to someone you meet can make a person’s day and help you feel less stressed in the process. Or, if you’re feeling stressed about being isolated or disconnected from loved ones or community during the holidays, devoting time to helping out in your area may reduce your cortisol levels and help you form new social connections.
How a therapist can help
For help reducing or coping with the stress of the season, you may benefit from connecting with a therapist. If family gatherings have you stressed, they can help you learn to set and communicate healthy boundaries. If you suspect mental illness like anxiety or depression is impacting how you feel, they can help you manage symptoms. If you simply need a listening ear and a neutral perspective on your feelings or your situation, they can provide that as well.
Online therapy to manage holiday stress
Especially for those who are traveling or extra busy at this time of year, virtual therapy may be a more available option for seeking treatment. Research suggests that it can offer similar benefits to in-person sessions, and it can be done from anywhere you have an internet connection. An online therapy platform, like BetterHelp, can match you with a therapist whom you can speak with via phone call, video call, and/or chat, so you can get the support you need for the challenges you may be facing.
Takeaway
The holidays are a stressful time for many people. Being intentional about boundaries and taking time to rest and care for yourself during this season can help you manage your stress levels, and connecting with a therapist may be a useful strategy as well.
How can I reduce holiday stress?
Alongside the ways of reducing stress during the holidays that are outlined in this article, several other techniques may also be helpful. These include taking steps to stay organized, planning ahead to reduce last-minute scrambling, making time for yourself, and seeking outside support—whether from a family, friend, or counselor—if you feel you need it. Engaging in self-care, such as mindfulness, hygiene, and physical activity, may also be helpful.
How can I reduce my stress for Christmas?
How do you manage stress in this time of pandemic?
The COVID-19 pandemic has created many new potential sources of stress, ranging from worries about health and well-being to financial difficulties and transitions back to the office. Self-care strategies may be particularly helpful for those experiencing stress due to the pandemic. These may include working to practice mindfulness, eating a healthy diet rich in fresh fruit and vegetables, engaging in regular exercise, and practicing enjoyable hobbies.
If you are experiencing stress during the holidays due to the COVID virus, you might consider exploring ways to mitigate risk. For instance, if you have concerns about a holiday gathering in close quarters, you might try speaking to family about practicing social distancing. Taking steps to handle stress when it arises, such as taking deep breaths, journaling, or removing yourself from the situation, may also be useful.
How do you manage your emotions during the holidays?
When the holidays start to become stressful, managing one’s emotions may be challenging. Those who are especially stressed may eat more than usual, turn to alcohol, or sleep too much or too little. However, these coping strategies may have potential drawbacks for physical and mental health. Instead, you might try journaling about what you’re feeling, using mindfulness to get in touch with your emotions, or giving yourself space when you feel you need it. These may be helpful ways to manage your emotions and reduce holiday stress.
Why are people stressed during the holidays?
People may feel more stressed than usual during the holidays because of the large amount of planning and logistics that may be involved in social gatherings. Financial stress may also play a role, particularly if gifts are expected, and family get-togethers have the potential to unearth conflicts and disagreements. These factors, among others, may all contribute to feelings of stress during the holiday season.
How can I relax and enjoy the holidays?
Relaxing during the holidays may be challenging at times, especially if you’re juggling multiple responsibilities or have limited time to yourself. In these cases, it may be helpful to give yourself permission to step back and hand tasks off to others. You might also find it useful to set aside some alone time, even if this means putting aside certain things on your to-do list. This may allow you to get some breathing room between get-togethers and find time to enjoy your holidays.
What are 10 ways to manage stress?
The following 10 strategies may be helpful for managing stress:
Getting regular exercise
Giving yourself space and alone time, especially around the holidays
Eating a healthy diet
Practicing meditation or mindfulness
Seeking support from family or friends
Practicing good hygiene
Making time for hobbies and enjoyable activities
Considering therapy or counseling
Limiting the use of alcohol and drugs
Journaling about your thoughts and emotions
How do you manage time in the midst of a pandemic?
How are you coping with the new situation during this pandemic?
How can I feel better on the holidays?
What makes people feel better during the holidays may vary from person to person. However, you may find that distancing yourself from social media, practicing gratitude, engaging in acts of charity or volunteer work, or focusing on quality time with loved ones may help to boost your mood.
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