How To Handle Kids’ Stress And Why It Happens

Nearly everyone experiences stress in their lives for one reason or another. Stress doesn’t discriminate by age. Parents can experience parental stress; likewise, children may be impacted by stress in their daily interactions at school and home. Children can absorb the pressure of their environment, and their reactions might be misunderstood as simply "acting out."

Many things may cause behavioral changes and indicate higher stress levels in a child. A child may not have the comprehension or words to explain to a parent or caretaker that they're stressed about something. Thus, it might result in irritability, sleep troubles, bed wetting, clinginess, crying about nothing, changes in eating habits, or not being interested in things they often enjoy. 

Though they may not fully understand the situations they're exposed to, children can be impacted by things like recurrent illness, family troubles, divorce, and the loss of a loved one or pet. They often can’t grasp why someone or something they love isn't there anymore. If a parent or caretaker is often stressed, the child may pick up on that stressful energy.

Younger children are still learning to manage their emotions. It's normal for them to experience things that may not always be pleasant. This may help them to learn more about their feelings and how to process and express them. Sometimes, however, it can become overwhelming, and they may need extra help in making it through a difficult circumstance.

Coping with stress in kids

A child's first few years can significantly impact their worldview, emotions, behaviors, and responses for the rest of their lives. This is the prime period for emotional development, and providing them with love, support, and the healthiest possible environment is ideal. However, things beyond a parent or caretaker's control sometimes occur.

Little ones may get so flustered due to stress that they don’t know what to do with themselves. Here are some ways you might be able to help: 

• Breathing exercises: You can teach a child breathing practices to help slow their heart rate. 
• Hydration: You can also teach them to take a moment to get a drink to hydrate themselves and calm down in the process. 
• Humor: Little kids love to laugh and play, so making goofy faces, doing a silly dance, getting a stuffed animal to “talk to them” in a goofy voice, or playing a fun game might cheer them up and help get their minds off whatever is bothering them.

School-age children are also affected by many of the same situations that can impact a small child. They'll also face new challenges as they grow up and attend school. Sometimes, it can be a shock for a child used to being at home to suddenly be enrolled in school. 

They’ll meet children from different backgrounds and family types. And they’ll experience academic stress, homework, and even physical exhaustion from the school day. Some children thrive in social situations, but others may experience anxiety away from the comfort of their parents and the familiarity of their home.

When children of this age experience significant stress, it might come out as anger, irritability, not wanting to go to school, having headaches, or experiencing constant stomach aches. 

They may sometimes talk negatively about themselves, complaining that no one likes them or that they aren't smart enough to pass a test. They may even begin to pull away and interact less with their family and established friends. Negative hyperactivity may also be a sign of stress in this age group, such as acting out, throwing tantrums, or displaying signs of aggression.

How to handle stress in school-age kids

Calming and distracting techniques might also help children in this age group. For example, breathing exercises are ideal for calming them down when upset. Children in this age range can also learn to use their imagination for relaxing visualizations or guided meditations. 

For example, you might verbally walk your child through a calming process and encourage them to envision a happy place, somewhere familiar or made up where they feel comfortable. Then you can suggest they begin imagining other details to make them happy, like being with a loved one, friend, or family pet. 

Alternatively, you can look for guided meditation videos on YouTube or meditation apps designed to reduce stress. Regardless, this is also a technique they can learn to use independently without parental guidance so that it can benefit them away from home.

Older kids often have more options for distracting themselves and redirecting their attention from whatever is causing them stress. Instead of relying on a parent or caretaker to act goofy to distract them, a slightly older kid can watch a funny movie, play a fun game, or even go to the park to play. 

Pre-teen and teen stories

The pre-teen and teenage years can be some of the most challenging times for parents and children. Below, we’ll explore some potential stressors for children of this age group. 

Hormones

Hormones may be a significant factor for kids in this age group. The mental effects of puberty and the extreme flood of growth hormones can result in mood swings, irritability, and changes in behavior. 

Bodily changes can be viewed positively; some feel they're "finally growing up." Still, others may become self-conscious about how their new body looks. 

These changes can cause uncomfortable social situations when they develop earlier or later than their peers. Hormonal changes might also bring about numerous complications for teens experiencing romantic emotions and drives without the experience or maturity to navigate them properly.

Dating

Dating and relationships can lead to heartache and feelings of being left out or unwanted during the teen years. This can affect friendships and self-esteem in a potentially stressful manner. 

Bullying

Bullying could also become a challenge among those in this age group. Appearances and social connections begin to dictate popularity and likeability during teen years. And those who don’t benefit from their particular looks or status may experience lasting impacts from verbal, emotional, or physical bullying. 

Mood swings

Hormones can also cause mood swings as the brain and body try to adjust to the high and fluctuating estrogen and testosterone levels during this period. A teen's circadian rhythm (which affects their sleep habits) may also get thrown off during puberty and cause trouble sleeping at night. 

This might impact their ability to focus, which can cause challenges in school. This exhaustion may worsen overall moodiness. Since a teen's brain is still not fully developed, this may impact their ability to manage their emotions and cope with stressors.

Mental health challenges

Depression, anxiety, impulsive behaviors, and other mental health challenges may become more prominent during these years compared to younger age groups. Stress may also be displayed by changes in eating habits, lack of interest in activities, low energy, mood fluctuations, inability to focus, anxiety symptoms, and complaints of physical ailments such as headaches or stomach problems.

Coping with stress in teenagers and preteens

Pre-teens and teenagers have a more extensive selection of possible positive distractions than younger kids. They can read, play video games, spend time with friends, watch movies, play sports, or participate in other hobbies or activities.

For more information regarding the causes and signs of stress in children, teen stress, coping mechanisms to help them work through it, or further assistance with coping with stress and parenting in your own life, you might consider professional mental health services. 

Meeting with a mental health professional is another potentially beneficial option for children in this age group. It can be comforting for a child to have someone to discuss their stressors with, especially if they feel too embarrassed or hesitant to discuss things with their parents.

Many parents have hectic schedules full of work, family, and other responsibilities. Online therapy provides a helpful option for parents and children alike. With internet-based therapy, you can skip the commute and talk to a counselor from home. It’s often more convenient since appointments are available around the clock. 

Research shows promising results for remote mental health treatment. One meta-analysis of studies suggests no significant difference in outcomes between online therapy and its office-based counterpart. The study spanned years of research across various populations and mental health conditions. 

For adults, the professionals at BetterHelp are available remotely from the comfort of your home and with appointments to match your unique schedule. For children between 13 and 19, TeenCounseling offers connections to mental health professionals who specialize in working with this age group. If you or your child are struggling with stress, don't hesitate to reach out and get the help and guidance you need.