I’ve Never Felt Better, And I Know Exactly Why: Becca On Self-Care
This article highlights Becca's journey with online therapy and how therapy helped her implement self-care that led to improvement in a number of ways. It's a story that many individuals might relate to: Becca had considered speaking with a counselor on several occasions and looked into it frequently, but money, time, and insurance kept getting in the way.
After Becca's doctor suggested online therapy, she connected with a counselor and began making progress with her mental health.
Below is Becca's story, which has been lightly edited for clarity and grammar.
Becca's story
Becca’s experiences before therapy
"I always knew that I could benefit from speaking to a counselor, but I always had a reason not to, even though I would look into it frequently," Becca began. "Either money, insurance, or timing issues always stopped me. I was open to counseling but was never truly motivated to take any action on finding a method that would work best for me.
Doctor’s suggestion for therapy
"When my doctor suggested I look into therapy, she mentioned she had a patient who communicated online with their counselor, endless. I was intrigued by that since my schedule is so erratic, I didn't see how making scheduled appointments would work for either of us. The idea of being able to reach out to my counselor at any time held great appeal for me.
The choice of a messaging option
"I don't mind face-to-face interaction, but the messaging helps me get my thoughts out in a way that makes sense so that I'm being as honest and open as possible to get the best feedback. It allows me to take my time without wasting my counselor's time if I'm struggling to put feelings into words or get interrupted by work.”
How Becca found BetterHelp
Searching online counseling options
"So, I did a Google search and read the reviews on several online counseling options, but BetterHelp had the best reviews, and I immediately liked the feel of the website and such. It just felt right.
Signing up for BetterHelp
"When I signed up for BetterHelp, I was mainly looking to handle my depression and anxiety but also tackle issues related to stress, sleeping issues, family issues, relationship issues, and childhood trauma. I felt that I had so much to talk about that it was difficult for me to even find where to start. Even on medication, I was struggling to handle my depression and anxiety in a healthy way. I was doing well, but I knew I could be doing better."
If you are experiencing trauma, support is available. Please see our Get Help Now page for more resources.
Changes Becca experienced after starting counseling with BetterHelp
"I've been working with Jason, my BetterHelp counselor, since I signed up in late December 2017," Becca continued.
"After our initial conversation, he mentioned how he was into spiritual things such as Reiki, crystals, energy, etc. Since that's something that had started to heavily influence my life, I felt relaxed and comfortable speaking about those things to someone who could fully relate and understand what I meant.
"I find that I've unknowingly come to rely on his responses, advice, and input to help me. Knowing I can say anything anytime to him without zero judgment is incredibly freeing. Having that unbiased ear to listen to me and provide advice and feedback is so refreshing for me.
"I think I would have put myself at a 5/10 when I first signed up, but at the time, I probably thought I was more of a 7.5/10. However, now I feel confident saying that I feel like I'm truly at 7.5-8/10 most days,” reported Becca.
Exercise and other self-care habits to improve mental health
“I've managed to implement healthier habits into my daily life with Jason's help, suggestions, articles, etc. I feel less guilty for feeling, and I'm improving on how best to handle my sensitivity and emotions and how to communicate them.
"We started with just me dumping all of my thoughts out into a jumbled mess of paragraphs and feelings. Once we sifted through everything and started getting to the root of the issues, Jason was better able to provide more specific guidance. He gave me tips like exercise to manage my stress and sleeping habits. He provided affirmations that I looked at daily to help keep my mind positive and not from sinking, and he made suggestions on how to implement healthier self-care habits for myself.
Someone to talk to
"I think one of his greatest attributes is his way of knowing when I need an ear and when I need actual advice. Sometimes we just talk out a situation because he seems to know that's what I need most at that moment.”
Becca's experiences with self-care
"For example, saying no to things I don't truly want to do is not a bad thing. In the past, I would find myself doing things I didn't want to because I knew that the other party wanted to do it. But now I can confidently turn down a night out for dinner and not feel bad because I need to be at home alone in my own space.
"I still struggle with my sensitivity not only to my own emotions but to others as well. However, with Jason's help and guidance, I've been able to start implementing ways to shield myself from being drained by those around me," Becca explained.
"Jason understands that how I'm feeling isn't me being overemotional or 'out of control.' It's a result of my being so sensitive that I can feel others' moods and energies, and if I don't do something, those feelings and energies can drain me. It happens slowly sometimes, and I don't even realize it until Jason asks how I've been doing with it. He basically calls me out in the kindest way.
"I'm not sure if he actually knows I've been lacking or if it's a feeling or what, but every time he's asked me, I've realized that while I'm not feeling horrible, I've felt better, and I know exactly why: self-care. Maybe I slacked, and now I'm grouchy or touchy. But simple reminders to continue doing things for myself have truly helped me get through most of my dark and twisty days."
Online therapy may help
If you are experiencing challenges similar to Becca’s, you may benefit from speaking to a therapist. If you feel hesitant to sign up for traditional in-person therapy, you may benefit from online therapy. Research shows that online therapy is effective for a variety of mental health challenges, including anxiety and depression.
Benefits of online therapy services
Online therapy services tend to offer easier scheduling, more affordable prices, and a broader range of professionals than you might be able to find locally. Becca was also excited about being able to send endless messages to her counselor, a feature provided by BetterHelp. You can contact your therapist at any time in between sessions, and they’ll respond as soon as they can.
Takeaway
If you're interested in counseling services but life always gets in the way, you may benefit from online therapy. With BetterHelp, you can be matched with a licensed therapist who has experience in your specific areas of concern, and you can switch therapists as often as you'd like until you find someone who is a good fit. Take the first step toward getting support and contact BetterHelp today.
Why is self-care important?
Self-care simply refers to prioritizing behaviors that maintain health and well-being. Therefore, prioritizing self-care can mean improving physical health, (including improved immune system function), managing stress, and improving overall quality of life.
Is exercise good for mental health?
Regular exercise is not only beneficial in maintaining physical health, but it has also been shown by research to reduce stress and promote mental and emotional health as well.
What are examples of self-care?
There are so many ways that an individual can practice self-care. Some examples of physical self-care may include maintaining good sleep hygiene to get enough sleep, getting regular physical activity, spending time in fresh air and sunshine, and following healthy eating practices.
Emotional or spiritual self-care can include engaging in spiritual practices that involve a higher power (or not), allowing yourself periods of rest and rejuvenation throughout the day, participating in activities that bring joy, and doing anything else that personally improves your emotional well-being.
Social self-care may involve allowing yourself time for social activities, maintaining healthy relationships with both friends and family members, and setting boundaries.
Mental self-care practices overlap some of the previous categories with activities that maintain psychological well-being, but can also include cognitive exercises such as puzzles, games, pursuing education, or learning a new instrument or language.
What do you mean by self-care?
Self-care encompasses a wide range of habits and actions that fall under the umbrella of taking care of yourself. The greater meaning of self-care is practicing habits that promote health and overall well-being. Regular self-care practices can be used to reduce stress, prevent disease and reduce risk of mental illness, promote increased self-esteem, cope with life change, and improve overall health.
Why is self-care important?
According to the World Health Organization, more self-care means greater physical, mental, and emotional or spiritual health. Some negative consequences for neglecting self-care can include greater risk of developing mental health disorders, more frequent illness, and less ability to cope with life stressors.
What is normal self-care?
Normal self-care can mean practicing habits that promote your own health and wellness. This means doing things that decrease the risk of disease like eating nutritionally dense foods, getting regular exercise, and spending time in nature. It can also involve working on creating work-life balance, and managing stress in your daily life.
How to make a self-care plan?
Creating a self-care routine starts with determining your self-care needs. Which parts of your life could use more focus? For example, you may eat healthy and get adequate sleep, but leave little time to nurture your social relationships. In this case, your social well-being may need some care.
Once you’ve identified where you can improve, create actionable steps to implement these practices. Start with small steps. For example, if you have never followed an exercise routine, don’t make a goal to go to the gym every day. Start by getting more steps in per day, or signing up for a group fitness class that piques your interest.
How to do emotional self-care?
Emotional self-care is important, especially for those with mental health conditions, people with stressful jobs (whether a teacher, an EMT, or the executive director of a company), or individuals experiencing adverse life events. Some self-care tips for emotional health include taking mental breaks throughout the day, maintaining close relationships, and participating in activities that you enjoy.
What are self-care behaviors?
Self-care behaviors encompass a wide range of actions that can include fairly common practices to the highly individual. Getting regular exercise is self-care. Drinking water is self-care. A lavender-scented bubble bath is self-care. Taking 5 minutes to cry in a closet is self-care. Saying “no” is self-care.
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