Exploring Psychosexual Therapy: The Benefits Of Working With A Sex Therapist
Physical intimacy is an important component of many romantic relationships. Those who want to enhance their sex life may turn to mental health professionals who can help them address emotional challenges that may be inhibiting their physical closeness. Psychosexual therapists, or sex therapists, are professionals who help couples overcome intimacy-related emotional challenges and strengthen their sexual connection. Below, we’ll discuss the role of the psychosexual therapist, the benefits of sex therapy, and the options for working with a sex therapist in the UK.
What is psychosexual therapy?
Psychosexual therapy, or sex therapy, is a form of psychotherapy that aims to help individuals or partners address intimacy concerns and improve their sexual well-being. Sex therapy is a form of talk therapy, a psychological approach that involves discussing the sources of challenges with a trained provider and then developing strategies for overcoming them. While it is often conducted as couples therapy involving all partners, individuals can also participate in sex therapy.
What types of relationship therapists provide sex therapy?
Sex therapists are mental health professionals with backgrounds that can vary significantly. A sex therapist may be a psychologist, psychiatrist, social worker, or counselor. While these relationship therapists often have varied professional backgrounds, they will typically need specialized training in psychosexual therapy in order to practice the modality.
How long does psychosexual therapy last?
How long a person or a couple may need to attend sex therapy can depend on the specific goals they want to achieve or the concerns they are experiencing. While some clients may require as few as five sessions, others may participate in 20–30 sessions before reaching their objectives. If you’re interested in pursuing sex therapy, a professional can share more information about how many sessions you may need.
Common sources of intimacy challenges
There are many different concerns that may impact an individual’s or a couple’s sexual well-being. The following are some of the most common causes of intimacy challenges:
- Mental health disorders
- Physical health concerns
- Lack of communication
- Low self-esteem
- Insecure attachments
- Fear of intimacy
- Relationship conflict
- Sexual dysfunction
- Infidelity
- Past trauma
Potential benefits of working with a psychosexual therapist
Studies suggest that psychosexual therapy may lead to improved sexual satisfaction, desire, and function. In addition to improving an individual’s or a couple’s sex life, sex therapy may also help partners communicate more effectively, develop trust, and address any individual mental health challenges that may be affecting their connection.
Reduced mental health concerns
Psychosexual and relationship therapy can help participants address any underlying mental health challenges that may be impacting intimacy. For example, many people live with anxiety related to intimacy, commitment, or sexual performance. Research suggests that sex therapy may help reduce anxiety and improve the quality of one’s sexual life.
People who have experienced sexual trauma may also benefit from psychosexual therapy. A therapist can help trauma survivors process complex feelings regarding physical intimacy and learn coping strategies for triggering situations. While psychosexual therapy will typically not be the first-line treatment for post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) or other trauma-related mental illnesses, it can sometimes be utilized as a helpful complementary therapy for clients who are interested in it.
Sex therapy may also help people with sexual problems like compulsive sexual behaviors develop a healthier relationship with sex. There is evidence that psychosexual interventions may help individuals who are experiencing sex addiction, pornography addiction, and related behavioral concerns.
Improved communication
It isn’t always easy to talk about intimacy concerns, even with your own partner. A sex therapist is specifically trained to create a safe, comfortable environment that may help couples share their thoughts and feelings about sex. Partners may feel heard and understood when they can express themselves without fear of judgment, which may help couples communicate more effectively in other aspects of their relationship as well.
Enhanced sexual function
Sexual dysfunction is a challenge that affects many couples. A sex therapist can help a couple navigate the emotional aspects of challenges like erectile dysfunction, painful intercourse, or orgasmic dysfunction. Partners may be encouraged to share their feelings regarding sexual dysfunction or learn techniques for addressing it. A sex therapist can also help couples address changes in sexual desire or function that may be caused by aging, injury, health conditions, or other factors.
What techniques might a sex therapist use?
There are many different methods sex therapists may use to help their clients enhance sexual intimacy. Often, therapists facilitate a dialogue that prompts couples to openly share their sexual preferences with each other or express their appreciation for each other. For example, a professional may ask each partner to discuss their fantasies and then come up with ways of engaging in them as a couple. This can help partners better understand each other and become more comfortable communicating their desires.
Another example is that therapists may help participants—particularly those who experience anxiety—engage in breathwork or meditation. These types of mindfulness strategies may help them focus on the present when they’re physically intimate. Research suggests that mindfulness can be associated with greater sexual satisfaction and overall sexual well-being.
Because of the nature of intimacy concerns, “homework” is often assigned for the individual or the couple to engage in outside of sessions. For instance, therapists may ask couples to engage in sensual touching activities (e.g., massage, mindful touching), kegel exercises, or other techniques at home.
Another common modality in this field is cognitive behavioral therapy, which focuses on the connection between a client’s thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Using CBT principles, sex therapists may help partners understand how certain thought processes contribute to their sexual connection. Take, for example, a situation in which one partner experiences unhelpful thoughts about sexual contact and hygiene. Through cognitive behavioral therapy, a therapist may help them reframe their beliefs, potentially leading to more comfort and increased intimacy.
How a psychosexual therapist can address client mental health challenges
Because sex therapists are mental health professionals, they typically have the training and qualifications necessary to help clients manage any psychological concerns that may be affecting their sexual well-being. For instance, they may employ techniques like role-playing exercises, which could help a partner with anxiety become more comfortable with physical closeness. Or, they might help one partner address ruminations regarding sex, which could arise out of depression.
A sex therapist may also help participants learn more about their sexual orientation or gender identity. For example, a couple’s sexual life may change when one partner begins the process of transitioning to the gender they identify with. A sex therapist can help all partners navigate this change and the emotions it may bring up.
How to find a sex therapist (UK)
If you’re in the United Kingdom and are looking for a professional psychosexual therapist to help you address sexual and relationship issues, there are several options you can explore. First, for those who are eligible for NHS care, it may be possible to receive this type of treatment for free by getting a referral from your GP.
If you want to find a non-NHS therapist, you might go through the College of Sexual and Relationship Therapists (COSRT), which is the professional organization of sex therapists in the UK. Through COSRT’s Find a Therapist tool, you can search through a large directory of professionals in this field. You’ll also be able to filter the results based on the providers who are closest to you.
You can also search for sex therapists using your insurance’s directory of providers, if you have health insurance. If you’re struggling to find psychosexual therapists in your area, you might also consider connecting with a provider remotely through an online therapy platform.
Qualifications to look for in a sex therapist: UK credentials
Ensuring your psychosexual therapist is properly qualified can help you feel more confident as you begin your counseling journey. Sex therapists in the United Kingdom typically need to have trained in an accredited counseling or psychology program. They will usually also be registered with COSRT or the Institute of Psychosexual Medicine.
Some counselors may also choose to pursue gender, sexual, and relationship diversity (GSRD) training, which can better prepare them to help clients who are part of the LGBTQIA+ community or who practice some form of non-monogamy. If you’re unsure about a professional’s credentials, consider scheduling a consultation. There, you can ask about your sex therapist’s experience, ensuring they have helped individuals or partners with similar concerns to those that you’re facing in the past. You’ll also have the opportunity to determine whether their therapeutic style and personality fit your needs.
Participating in relationship therapy online
It isn’t always easy for couples to find the time to address intimacy concerns and other relationship challenges. Online psychosexual therapy can make it easier for individuals or partners to fit sex therapy into their schedule.
Potential benefits of online relationship therapy or sex therapy
Online therapy platforms like BetterHelp allow you to schedule therapy sessions at times that work for you—no commuting required. Because you can participate in sessions with an accredited psychosexual therapist or other type of provider remotely via video call, voice call, or messaging, you and your partner can work on enhancing physical closeness even when you aren’t in the same place. Many people also find talking about sensitive subjects like sex to be easier when they’re not face to face with their care provider.
Is working with relationship therapists online effective?
There is a substantial body of evidence pointing to the potential efficacy of online therapy in helping individuals and partners address emotional or sexual difficulties that may be impacting their sexual well-being. For example, findings from one study suggest that online relationship therapy led to improved symptoms of sexual dysfunction in participants. In general, you can expect the quality of online care to be similar to that of in-person care.
Takeaway
Sex therapy is a form of relationship psychotherapy that can help couples strengthen their physical connection and deepen their overall bond. By working with a sex therapist, partners may be able to learn about the importance of sexual wellness, become closer emotionally, and address underlying mental health challenges. If you’d like to cultivate greater physical intimacy in your relationship or address sex-related challenges individually, you might consider participating in psychosexual therapy online or in person.
Frequently asked questions
How much is sex therapy in the UK?
Sex therapy in the UK can have varying costs, depending on the provider offering the counselling, therapy options in one’s area, and whether the therapist is an independent practice therapist or works in public health. You may struggle to find sex therapy through public health services, as psychosexual and relationship therapists are not often covered under NHS unless there is a medical need. However, you may be able to find a low-cost or free therapist through other options, such as charities or online therapy platforms with qualified therapists with experience in supporting relationship difficulties related to sexuality and sex.
What does a sex therapist actually do?
A sex therapist supports clients with relationship challenges, sexual health, sexual identity, and other sexual issues. They may work with a client on compulsive sexual behaviors or address mental barriers to sexual relationships that are hindering an individual’s sexual well-being. Often, they also serve as relationship counsellors to support those with relationship problems outside of sexual challenges, such as family dynamics or difficulty communicating. Sex therapy is meant to be a sex-positive and non-judgmental space where people can open up about any topic. The therapist can then guide them through evidence-based practices.
Can a single person go to a sex therapist?
Single people can and do see sex therapists. Sex therapy is a safe space to talk about any relationship topic, such as open relationships or a unique sex life. Some people seek sex therapy for sexual trauma to work through past wounds so they can feel more comfortable in their sexual and romantic relationships. A sex therapist can also help people gain a sense of comfort around the topic of sexuality. These providers are fully qualified to offer therapy through organizations like the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy and use ethics guidelines in their approach to treatment. A sex therapist never participates in sexual acts with a client. Sex therapy is like regular talk therapy but takes a biopsychosocial approach to treating sexual challenges and concerns.
What do sex therapists get asked the most?
One of the most common questions sex therapists hear is: “Am I normal?” Sex is often considered a taboo subject in society, leading to stigma surrounding sexual challenges like sexual dysfunction, difficulty getting aroused, or questioning one’s sexuality. No matter what you’re struggling with, a sex therapist is there to help you, not judge you. You are normal, and many other people may be living with the same challenges as you.
What is a sexologist vs. a sex therapist?
A sexologist is someone who has studied the topic of sex and all that comes with it. A sex therapist has gone to school to receive a degree in counseling and is a qualified therapist through a national organization or board. Therapists can provide therapy to clients, involving counseling, mental health support, and advice. Sexologists might offer advice, but they are not qualified to offer therapy and haven’t trained in counseling techniques.
How can you get sex therapy in the UK?
There are several ways to find a sex therapist in the UK. You may be able to find relationship therapy through the NHS. However, you can also try options like independent practice therapists or looking for a provider through your school or employer. Online therapy is also an option.
What is the difference between a sex coach and a sex therapist?
Sex therapists take a more mental health-oriented approach to therapy. They provide guidance based on psychological training and evidence-based counseling methods. Sex coaches can provide advice and guidance regarding sexual topics only and are not trained in the psychological research behind sex therapy techniques.
What happens during sex therapy?
Each sex therapy session is different, as client needs differ. However, the first session is generally an intake session to get to know the client or clients. The therapist can then build a treatment plan based on their unique goals and symptoms to support them. You don’t have to have a mental illness to try therapy of any type. Sex therapists can assist with a variety of challenges.
What is the success rate of sex therapy?
Sex therapy success rates depend on the challenge being treated. For example, studies show that sex therapy is effective for 62% of clients with premature ejaculation. Couples therapy in itself has been found effective for 70% of couples.
Will insurance pay for sex therapy?
Insurance might cover sex therapy if it is considered medically necessary. However, some plans don’t cover couples therapy at all. In these cases, online sex therapy may be a cheaper alternative, often offering costs similar to individual online therapy and providing added accessibility.
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