Finding The Right Fit: How Changing Therapists Can Enhance Your Mental Health
Making the decision to seek mental health services and attend therapy sessions can be a courageous step toward personal well-being. Whether you’re facing high stress levels, navigating complex relationships, or living with a mental health condition, a therapist can often provide valuable support. However, when a mental health professional is unable to meet your specific needs or your therapeutic relationship doesn’t feel right, it can be difficult to make progress. Here, we’ll explore the role of a therapist, the importance of a positive therapeutic relationship, why someone might want to change therapists, and tips for starting that process.
The role of a therapist
Understanding the role of a therapist can provide insight into the direct mental health impacts of finding the right provider.
Therapists and mental health professionals play a pivotal role in helping clients navigate emotional, psychological, and behavioral challenges. Their primary function is to create a safe, nonjudgmental space where clients can openly explore their thoughts, feelings, and experiences. This requires an overall sense of trust and understanding, plus the therapist’s familiarity with specific mental health challenges and evidence-based techniques to address them. For example, someone facing marriage challenges may benefit from working with a family therapist, while someone navigating symptoms of depression might progress with a therapist who specializes in treating the condition.
Overall, when a therapist’s expertise and a client’s needs align, a successful therapeutic relationship can form. When these elements are missing, the therapeutic process may stall, leading individuals to consider switching therapists.
Common types of therapy
Talk therapy is not a one-size-fits-all solution. Instead, it encompasses a wide variety of methods and modalities designed to address specific mental health conditions and suit various personal preferences. There are hundreds of approaches out there today, but some of the most common types of therapy services include:
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT)
- Focuses on identifying and changing negative thought patterns and behaviors
- Emphasizes verbal expression and emotional processing
- May be suitable for a wide range of challenges, including grief, relationship challenges, self-esteem concerns, and many others
- May also be ideal for short-term, goal-oriented work, such as treating anxiety, depression, and phobias
Psychodynamic therapy
- Explores past experiences, unconscious processes, and their impact on current behavior
- Often requires a longer commitment and tends to be more effective for addressing deep-seated emotional challenges and relationship patterns
Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT)
- A specialized form of CBT that focuses on emotional regulation, distress tolerance, and interpersonal effectiveness
- Often effective for individuals living with borderline personality disorder, self-harming behaviors, or chronic emotional instability
Relationship counseling (couples or family therapy)
- Designed to help improve communication, resolve conflicts, and strengthen relationships
- May be ideal for couples or families experiencing difficulties such as miscommunication, trust issues, or parenting challenges
Understanding some of these key options can be helpful when considering changing therapists. For example, a client who feels stuck with CBT might benefit from the more structured approach of DBT. By exploring different modalities, individuals can make more informed decisions about their therapeutic journey and find a new therapist who offers the right type of support for them.
The importance of finding the right therapist
Finding the right therapist can be a critical step in ensuring successful therapy outcomes. A collection of data by the American Psychological Association suggests that the therapeutic relationship is often as powerful—if not more so—than the therapy technique itself. Based on 16 meta-analyses, the research indicates that agreeing on therapy goals, obtaining client feedback, and repairing ruptures are key when it comes to providers promoting positive results from therapy.
A successful therapeutic relationship is usually built on trust, empathy, and mutual understanding. However, the process of finding the right therapist to fill the role can feel overwhelming, especially amid challenges like therapist shortages and the rising cost of mental health services. Despite these hurdles, there are many resources available to those who are seeking help.
When looking for a therapist or a new therapist, you may want to consider their expertise and therapeutic style and whether these might align with your needs. Cultural competence can also be important, as working with a therapist who shares your cultural background or key life experiences can often help foster a deeper sense of safety and connection. Ultimately, the right therapist is usually one who aligns with your needs, values, and goals, creating a foundation for meaningful progress on your therapeutic journey.
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How changing therapists can improve mental health
While the idea of switching therapists may seem intimidating, it often has the potential to lead to significant mental health benefits if you’re feeling stuck or uncomfortable with your current provider. A new therapist might offer fresh perspectives, alternative approaches, and renewed energy for the therapeutic process. For those who feel stagnant or misunderstood in their current therapy sessions, a change may reignite progress and foster a more positive relationship with mental health care in general. Over time, these components may contribute to improved mental health.
When should I change therapists?
Deciding to change therapists is a personal choice. However, certain signs can indicate that it might be time to explore other options. Some examples include:
- You aren’t making progress. One of the most common reasons for considering a different therapist is a lack of progress. If a significant time in therapy hasn’t yielded results, it may be worth evaluating whether the current approach aligns with your needs.
- You are facing financial difficulties. Financial constraints can also prompt a change. If the cost of therapy sessions becomes unsustainable, discussing sliding-scale options with your current therapist may be a good first step. However, if they’re unable to accommodate your budget, seeking a provider who offers more affordable mental health services may be necessary.
- Your therapist is inappropriate with you. Unethical behavior, such as boundary violations or inappropriate conduct, is a clear red flag. In such cases, ending the therapeutic relationship immediately can often be crucial for your well-being. Reporting the therapist to the relevant licensing board may help protect others from similar experiences.
- You feel misunderstood. Feeling misunderstood or frequently having to educate your therapist about your identity or experiences can be counterproductive. A therapist’s lack of cultural competence or empathy can hinder progress and negatively impact your mental health. Seeking a therapist who better aligns with your background and values can make a significant difference.
Tips to consider when you’ve decided to change therapists
Acknowledging that a change is needed is the first and often most challenging step. It can be helpful to approach this decision with self-compassion, recognizing that prioritizing your mental health is generally a sign of strength.
Once you’ve made the decision to change therapists, the next step is finding a new provider. While finding a new therapist isn’t always straightforward or easy, there are some strategies and approaches that can help move the process along.
Approaching your current therapist
While informing your current therapist about your decision can feel daunting or uncomfortable, it can be an opportunity for closure. While you don’t owe them an explanation, being honest about your reasons may help them support you in the transition. Some individuals choose to have a final session to reflect on their progress and express gratitude for the work done together, but there's no pressure to do so if you don’t feel comfortable. It’s also typically possible to simply stop scheduling sessions with a previous therapist if you prefer not to discuss your decision with them.
Breaking down the process of changing therapists
The process of switching therapists can feel overwhelming, but breaking it down into smaller steps can help. To start, you might make a list of a few platforms, directories, or services you’ll use to begin your search. You can then set aside some time to browse these using available filters that match your needs and preferences and narrow down your list to two or three promising candidates. Next, you might make a list of questions to ask each one about their approach and experience and then schedule consultations to do this.
Or, if you choose to use an online therapy platform like BetterHelp, you can simply fill out the brief onboarding questionnaire to get matched with a provider. We’ll talk more about this option below.
Keeping in mind the potential mental health benefits of finding a new therapist
Switching therapists can lead to renewed motivation and progress in therapy. A new therapist may introduce innovative techniques, offer fresh insights, or simply provide a better emotional fit. This shift can reinvigorate the therapeutic journey and could enhance overall mental health outcomes. Keeping in mind these potential mental health benefits may help you stay on track during the switching process, even when it feels challenging or frustrating.
Key potential benefits of online therapy
In recent years, online therapy has emerged as a convenient and effective alternative to traditional in-person sessions for many people. With the rise of digital platforms, receiving mental health services has become more flexible and convenient than before.
One of the key advantages of online therapy is the ease of switching therapists when needed. Platforms like BetterHelp streamline this process, allowing users to change therapists at any time, for any reason, for no additional cost and in just a few clicks. If you feel that your current therapist isn’t the right fit, BetterHelp’s system enables you to request a new match quickly and without the need for in-person transitions or a daunting search process.
The effectiveness of online therapy
Research suggests that online therapy can often be as effective as face-to-face sessions when it comes to treating symptoms of many mental health conditions, including anxiety, depression, and stress-related disorders. It also offers greater flexibility, making it easier to fit therapy into a busy schedule. Additionally, online platforms often provide the opportunity to get matched with someone from a larger pool of providers, potentially increasing your chances of finding the right fit.
Takeaway
Is it normal to change therapists?
It's considered normal to change therapists, since finding the right fit can have a significant influence on care outcomes. There are many reasons a person might decide to stop seeing their same therapist and change therapists, from feeling misunderstood by their current provider to wanting someone with a more similar background to them.
How do I tell if I need a new therapist?
There are a few different signs that might indicate it could be time to switch therapists. One is that you feel like you're stuck and not making progress in therapy. Another is that you feel misunderstood or judged in your therapy sessions, which can significantly hinder the therapeutic process.
How do I transition from one therapist to another?
You can change therapists at any time for any reason by letting your therapist know you’re looking for a new practitioner. They may be able to help you find your next therapist by giving you a referral to colleagues or providers who take the therapeutic approach you’re looking for. If you feel uncomfortable with your previous therapist, you don’t need to tell them you’re ending therapy services. Your mental health needs come first.
How do you politely change your therapist?
Therapists are used to having turnover with clients. It’s completely normal to say, “I’m looking to find therapists who practice a different modality,” or “I don’t feel comfortable continuing sessions with you.” You also don’t have to give a therapist a reason, especially if you feel unsafe with this provider. It is fairly common for clients to end services for multiple reasons, so try to cope with challenging feelings by reminding yourself that therapy is a service for you and that a good relationship with a provider can be critical to your therapeutic goals. Don’t let fear keep you in therapy with someone who isn’t helping you and is causing you to have a negative experience with therapy.
How do you let go of a therapist?
You can let go of a therapist by letting them know you’ve decided to seek another provider. Some people leave therapy because the current modality they’re trying doesn’t work. Others might leave because their insurance company refuses to provide insurance coverage for the specific treatment. An ethical therapist will respect boundaries, accept your desire to find a new provider, and offer to help you find a new therapist.
How long should you stay with a therapist before switching?
In the long run, repeatedly switching therapists may be unhelpful for your mental health. However, try a first session with someone to learn their style and decide whether you want to continue. Once you’ve established mental health and medical records with someone, try to give them a few sessions to explore whether therapy is helping you. If you still aren’t getting help, consider finding a new provider.
How do I know I need to change my therapist?
You might benefit from getting a new therapist if any of the following are true for you:
- Your therapist makes you feel anxious consistently
- Your therapist argues with you or refutes what you say about your own identity, such as your gender identity, sexuality, or diagnoses
- Your therapist practices a therapeutic modality that isn’t effective for your mental health concerns or makes you uncomfortable
- You don’t feel understood or safe in sessions
- Your therapist ignores your request for accommodations, such as having your service dog in the office
- You’re not experiencing growth or meeting your goals after many sessions and you’ve been doing the work
- Your therapist doesn’t ask questions, start conversations, or converse with you openly about topics, expecting you to always lead
There are many reasons people end therapy with a provider, but you can leave therapy for any reason. For example, if you have obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) and a modality like eye movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy (EMDR) doesn’t help you, you might decide to try a new therapist who offers exposure therapy, a modality considered more effective in treating OCD.
How long do people stay with the same therapist?
People often stay with therapists until they and their therapist decide they no longer need therapy. For some people, therapy takes only a few months. For others, therapy may be a lifelong support tool, especially as new events happen in one’s life.
Is it OK to go back to your old therapist?
Going back to your old therapist is okay, and it may be a healthy decision, especially if they were helpful to you and you had a positive therapeutic relationship. Therapists often keep client notes for a year or two after services end, so they may still have your file on hand and may know more about your situation than a new therapist.
How long does the average client stay in therapy?
There is no average amount of sessions someone has in therapy. Many people stay in therapy for years. Others only use therapy for a short-term issue, such as a big decision or a life transition. The option you choose is up to you.
Is there anything you shouldn't say to a therapist?
Therapists are not there to judge you. You can tell them anything that’s pertinent to your experiences and the goals you have for therapy. In general, clients should avoid aggressive, sexual, or romantic behavior or statements with their therapist. However, you can tell your therapist anything, and they can do their best to support you. Note that if you tell your therapist you’re going to harm yourself or others, they are mandated to report these statements to local authorities or crisis services.
Do therapists get tired of patients?
Therapists may experience emotional reactions to their clients. However, they are trained to cope with these emotions and tell a client when the therapeutic relationship is not working. A therapist can also end services with a client at any time for any reason, but they are often ethically obligated to help the individual find a new provider.
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