Emotion-Focused Therapy
Emotions are usually an integral part of relationships, with a focused intention on them playing a crucial role in forming a secure attachment with our partners. They're often what attracts us to our partners and what binds us to them throughout the relationship. Emotions also tend to provide us with the feelings of dependability that often accompany familial ties and unconditional love.
However, just as emotion can forge healthy bonds, strong negative emotions can cause difficulty in relationships, leading to negative interaction patterns. Sometimes, emotional distress can become stronger than “rational thought” and can cause misunderstandings and conflict in relationships. In those cases, emotion-focused therapy (EFT) may help.
Emotion-focused therapy
Emotionally focused therapy, often applied in couples therapy, tends to be centered around the individual, their emotions, and the response to these emotions in the context of their intimate relationships with others. If you're curious about the difference between emotion-focused therapy and somatic therapy, the former centers around on emotion control as the key component while the latter emphasizes the connection of mind and body.
As an emotion-focused approach, emotion-focused therapy has been evolving since the first manual was published 30 years ago in university training centers, with the change process involving many new steps added since then. Clients of therapists who use emotion-focused therapy may find it helpful because the reflective approach allows individuals to learn emotional control and understand others’ emotions, in addition to increasing awareness of their own emotional response and maladaptive emotions.
The emotion-focused therapy model operates on the concept that sometimes relationships can devolve for a variety of reasons. If these attachment needs are not addressed, problems in the relationship can become much larger, resulting in separation and/or intense mental health problems outside the relationship, further affecting the secure bond between partners.
Emotion-focused therapy method
Emotion-focused therapy typically centers around the attachment theory of human functioning. Attachment theory originally began with infants and their primary caregivers, but it was soon discovered that adults also have attachments. Attachment theory is related to some effects of interpersonal relationships and emotional experiences between humans. Many humans develop adaptive emotions as babies and feel safer when around their loved ones.
Almost everyone has experienced adult attachment of some type to another person. One of the most common, and sometimes painful, challenges that can cause problems in relationships is fear of abandonment from those we've formed family bonds with. An EFT therapist, who practices emotionally focused family therapy, may be able to help their client identify and address any potential fear of abandonment.
Another pillar of emotion-focused therapy is the concept of change and the cycle of negative emotional patterns that may occur in relationships. Sometimes the complications of change are harder to cope with within the framework of a relationship than they may otherwise be as an individual.
Whether there is insecurity, resentment, miscommunication, or another situation that is causing problems in the client's relationship, a family therapy specialist who listens to them and their family members may be able to provide helpful tools and new solutions to move forward and resolve concerns related to attachment.
Emotion-focused therapy isn’t only effective for helping couples; it can also be beneficial for treating individuals with a range of mental health challenges, such as eating disorders, anxiety, depression, and trauma. It can also be helpful for the families to resolve attachment and communication problems. Whether it’s for individuals, families, or couples, the benefits of this therapeutic approach can include:
- Greater emotional awareness, management, and well-being
- Greater ability to cope with unhelpful emotions and certain mental health conditions, such as depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and bipolar disorder
- Greater impulse control, self-control, and understanding of one’s emotions
- Making sense of attachment trauma
- Effective restructuring of interactions in love relationships that may have prevented couples from forming a bond
- Greater empathy
Emotion-focused therapy stages
As with many treatments, the techniques of emotion-focused therapy are broken down into stages. The following are the typical three stages of emotion focused therapy, but they may vary:
Stage one: De-escalation
Whatever the situation, before emotion focused therapy can work, the therapist often needs to try to calm anger and related arguments so they can proceed with stage one of the treatment. This stage is divided into four steps that take place in each introductory emotion focused therapy session:
- A therapist identifies any concerns the couples have, whether related to finances, aging, etc.
- Then, a therapist identifies how those concerns can create negative emotions and negative interactions that damage the relationship.
- A therapist looks for fears and emotions that may be hiding beneath one's conscious mind and may be causing those negative interactions.
- Next, a therapist explores how the main conflict is connected to those underlying emotions or an internal experience.
Stage two: Changing patterns
In the second stage, couples are typically taught how to interact better and express their emotional needs. The therapist may utilize a clinical handbook or other tools to teach the couple to communicate and express themselves. This active process is divided into three steps:
- A couple can discuss their deep-rooted emotions, as well as their wants and needs.
- Each partner is taught different ways to empathize and accept their partner's needs.
- Partners are taught to express their emotions and needs and to discuss these needs without conflict moving forward.
Stage three: Integrating
The third stage includes two steps:
- A therapist presents the couple with ways to communicate with their partner and to create better solutions for problems in the past, present, and future.
- Couples leave therapy prepared to use the coping strategies they’ve learned. In this step, the therapist may ask the couple to make a concrete plan for better interaction should a difficult situation arise.
Does emotion-focused therapy work?
No kind of therapy is 100% effective. Some couples find they can't settle their differences without separating, but emotion focused therapy research indicates that it has been effective for most people.
Part of EFT’s effectiveness may be due to its thorough, continuous influence on the couple’s relationship beyond the initial treatment, restructuring interactions and fostering a safe haven, even if the couple only engaged in short term therapy. There are typically follow-up appointments, and most couples implement lifelong learning and continue using the techniques throughout their relationship.
Takeaway
Some couples choose to see a therapist in person at an office to center on the family process, but with the rise in popularity of online therapy, many are opting to speak with a therapist from home instead. Couple’s therapy can be an emotional experience, and for many, addressing those emotions is much easier from the comfort of home.
Online therapy has been shown to be just as effective as in-person therapy, and you can usually choose how to communicate with your therapist. With BetterHelp, you can contact your therapist via phone, videoconference, or in-app messaging. Take the first step to a stronger relationship and reach out to BetterHelp today.
What's emotion-focused therapy used for?
Emotionally focused therapy is often used in marriage therapy and couples counseling, but it can also be used for individual therapy and family therapy.
One of the core techniques used in emotion focused therapy is systematic evocative unfolding. To employ the technique, EFT therapists will guide clients through a re-experiencing of a troubling situation or traumatic event that brought about a painful emotion or unexpected reaction. This may include reprocessing tasks that help a client realign the experience and emotions with their true selves. The goal is to help the client identify the emotions that surface and come to a better understanding of the brain’s response to the event and the emotion schemes that developed as a result. With the memory reconsolidation understood, the client may be empowered to move forward in a healthier way, letting go of the baggage of the past.
How long does emotion-focused therapy (EFT) take?
According to the Society of Clinical Psychology, emotions focused therapy can take between eight and twenty sessions to be the most effective. Individuals and couples can work with emotions focused therapists to devise their treatment plan, tailored to their needs and preferences.
Psychodynamic therapy can be used to treat a wide variety of mental health conditions. Here are some examples:
Anxiety
Depression
Substance use disorders
Relationship problems
Eating disorders
Avoidant personality disorder
Can emotion-focused therapy treatment cure anxiety?
While emotion-focused therapy may not be able to cure anxiety completely, psychotherapy research suggests that it can help improve symptoms and teach people to manage anxiety.
Is emotion-focused therapy scientifically proven?
Yes. Three decades of research in the behavioral and brain sciences shows that emotion-focused therapy can be effective for treating various mental health conditions and life challenges in a wide variety of settings, including couples therapy.
Is emotion-focused therapy effective for trauma?
Yes. Emotions focused therapy is strongly linked to positive outcomes for individuals who have experienced a traumatic life event and is an empirically supported treatment for trauma.
What is the difference between EFT and CBT?
Emotionally focused therapy (EFT) and cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) can both be considered systemic therapies and may have similar goals, but their approaches vary. While CBT seeks to uncover negative patterns of thinking and behavior, emotions focused therapy is a therapy related to human emotions. Whereas CBT may focus on changing one’s thinking, EFT emphasizes changing emotion.
What are the criticisms of EFT?
As with most therapeutic techniques, there are some criticisms of emotionally focused couples therapy. Some critics take issue with the fundamental theory of change underlying the method, arguing that emotional arousal is not a necessary change agent. Others say it is primarily suited for addressing relationship problems or marital distress and may not be appropriate for individual therapy.
What happens with a therapist in an EFT session?
Therapy experiences may vary depending on the therapist the client chooses to see as well as their needs and preferences. Still, an emotionally focused therapist will typically employ therapeutic methods directed at making positive changes in the relationship with the client's romantic partner.
This may involve an intensive analysis of the client's past, including any painful emotion related to their childhood and attachment with their parents. Identifying this emotional pain can lead to greater self understanding and increased emotional intelligence. EFT is largely an experiential therapy. Through targeted therapeutic tasks, they may also come to understand how their partner’s emotional world functions differently than their own.
The idea behind EFT is that by unlocking blocked feelings, enacting structural emotional change, and restructuring attachment, one can ultimately solve any problems plaguing the relationship and create safe and secure bonds going forward. Together, the client and the therapist will engage in a process of co-creating clinical maps for change to target specific problems in the relationship.
In some cases, a client may struggle with self-criticism, referred to in EFT as a self-evaluative split or a perceived mismatch between who the individual is and who they want to be. In these cases, the therapist may use an experiential psychotherapy process called the “two chair dialogue” to help the client face parts of themselves they disapprove of. It may be that the person has acted in a way that defies a cherished belief or long-held value, for instance.
After an EFT session, a practicing professional may engage in task analysis to identify and confirm ways in which the client experienced change. This is a way of evaluating psychotherapeutic success.
Is emotion-focused therapy good for anxiety?
Yes. Emotion-focused therapy can be effective in treating anxiety disorders such as social anxiety disorder and generalized anxiety disorder.
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