How do I get past the hurt I was caused during an alcoholic relapse of my partner? I hurt

I'm so sorry that this is something you have had to experience. After something traumatic happens in our lives we are determined to figure out how to get past it, but since memories cannot be erased from our minds it is our responsibility to find a way to live with these memories that is manageable and healthy. The very first thing that would be helpful to focus on is ourselves and how to heal.

Self-compassion is a very tough skill to master, we as humans were not taught how to be self-compassionate effectively so when it comes time to address our suffering we are uncomfortable. We must realize that we deserve to give ourselves just as much care and concern that we would give to others in times like this; by virtue of being a human we are worthy of it. We have the power to heal ourselves when we put in effort and work, it is the most genuine and loving thing we can do for ourselves.

After investing time in yourself and your healing, then you can consider where you stand regarding your relationship with your partner. It would be a great time to first ask yourself and honestly answer "Is my safety (literal and perceived) at stake?" "Is this relationship something I can handle right now?" "Will I be able to heal for my sake and stay true to myself if I resume being in this relationship?" and "Is the love that we have worth putting in the work on both of our ends to fix the relationship? Would he even be willing to work on himself and work on the relationship?" These are all questions that would need to be addressed after you begin addressing your trauma because again, you are your best chance at getting better. Ultimately it is you who needs to be able to love yourself before you can consider giving and receiving love from someone else, especially since being with this person has caused you trauma and PTSD resulting.

I really hope this was helpful, if you are looking to begin therapy to address your trauma I would be more than happy to help you through your journey. Please take care.