Having a hard time with sharing my daughter with anyone.

It is understandable to have some struggle with sharing your daughter with anyone. If she is your first and/or only child this is all a new experience for you and you are still navigating being a parent. Also this can be related to your daughter's age, when our children are younger we are often more protective over them.

There are other factors that could be playing into that feeling as well, specifically with your mother-in-law. If you have always felt like she tries to one up you then it would be a very normal transfer for you to feel like she does with your daughter as well. Many parents go through an insecure phase during their parenting and this is natural. You may be experiencing a more intense phase due to your history with anxiety and OCD.

Things to keep in mind, if your difficulty sharing your daughter starts to interfere with her interactions with others or activities she needs to be doing for her age that would be a concern as a parent since it is impacting her. Right now it sounds like it is impacting you which is something that you can work on to reduce the distress that it is causing you.

Reminding yourself that children go through developmental exploration phases where they may seem more affectionate or like they want to spend time with others but this is a normal process. If you feel yourself doubting or worrying about this, take time to think of how often you get hugs from your daughter and all of the time that you get together. Sometimes when we are worried about something we start to filter out information and heighten the worry, to prevent this we need to fact check ourselves and keep things in perspective. Self-soothing can also help reduce symptoms of anxiety when they occur. You would shift your focus to an activity or sensation using one of your 5 senses so that you can better ground yourself and manage your emotions. Once you feel calmer that would be when you want to fact check the situation. Another way to help relax when you are feeling worried is by using paced breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, mindfulness or mediation skills are also helpful.