How to deal with intrusive thoughts?

Hi, you're correct, they are just thoughts. They may be reminders of something that happened (or not) and they are definitely trying to be in front of your attention, but they are not reality.

It sounds that your thoughts can be intimidating. If you were to look at them- what is the most scary in them? How do they sound? Do they maybe remind you of anything or anyone in your life? What do you need when they emerge? 

Apart of the thoughts' content, it's also worth looking at their context and their function. Are they there all the time or come in certain situations? Is there any pattern to it? Any triggers? Are they trying to tell you something? I appreciate there is a lot questions for your reflection, but please don't feel obliged to answer them all, just focus on those you connect with. 

Our experience is built on different aspects: thoughts, emotions and bodily responses. 

Being aware of the thoughts, you could switch your attention to the emotions which are attached to them (what do you feel- is it always scared?), as well as observe how your body responds (where in your body do you feel it most, what kind of sensation is it?, etc., does it remind you of anything?)

It's quite important to remain calm or be able to return to calm, as you are potentially more in control then. In those difficult moments, you could try switching your attention to the 'here and now' and activate your senses like touching something you find comforting, smelling, finding 5 objects (for example) by looking around, listening to the sounds around you and finding as many as you can or doing something physically active to keep your body moving. This strategy might help to bring you back to the current moment rather than staying in your head.   

In a more general perspective, it is worth looking wider into your life quality- from the inside and out. For example, what is your relationship with yourself- how do you talk and treat yourself in general, even if the thoughts are not there? Are you your own best friend, or maybe you might have tendencies to be harsh to yourself or anything else? 

In terms of external factors it's worth looking at your social relationships and your circle of support, your lifestyle- do you get enough sleep, nutritious food, water, safety? 

It's worth remembering that our tolerance to stress lowers when we are: 

H- hungry

A- angry

L- lonely

T- tired

Looking after yourself on physical, mental, emotional and social level (and identifying barriers to it) increases quality of wellbeing and might reduce the risk of intrusive thoughts.