How do I not bring others down with me when I feel so sad?

Hi Catie, I am so sorry to hear you are going through so much and to hear of your mom's diagnosis. Even though you might feel like it's bringing others down, it is important to not isolate yourself. When we are going through a difficult time that's when we need support the most. It is also a great time to see who the more reliable individuals are in your life.

Therapy would be ideal to process this.  If that is not an option for you, allow people to help you when they offer or ask. It may be a challenge for you to ask for help, especially if you are independent. However, when you are going through a rough time emotionally you want to work through reframing the idea that "asking for or needing help from others" is bringing others down. I would recommend connecting with a community of faith if you have one where you can receive care, help and love unconditionally or small support group grappling with similar challenges. 

Making positive affirmations verbally could also be a good start to building your self-esteem up. Try saying 5 things you are grateful for and 5 things you love about yourself everyday. Being mindful of what your self-care needs are is also priority. Asking yourself about daily hydration, nutritional intake, sleep and exercise habits can improve your self-confidence and improve your overall well-being.

You have a sympathetic and a parasympathetic nervous system. Your parasympathetic nervous system is the part of your nervous system responsible for releasing endorphins, which are hormones that relax you. The sympathetic nervous system is the fight or flight part of your nervous system that kicks in when you not feeling the best. Being aware of the ratio of how much you are staying in one system compared to the other can help you feel a bit more empowered. I recommend allowing space for your sad emotions and shifting to self-care activities when possible. Maybe set a time frame of 20 minutes where you allow yourself to process your sad feelings and then allow for 20 minutes of a self-care activity or action afterwards.

Hopefully, these basic tips are helpful in some way.