I can not make friends or keep a relationship. It feels like I will eventually get betrayed. Why?

Hello there,

Thank you for your question.

Many of us want to have a friend that we can trust, be open and close with and even more to have a group of friends for fun and support and to take part in our interests and spend free time with, but being unable to trust can really get in the way of having this...perhaps there are painful past experiences that have led you to feel unable to trust right now, perhaps friends have hurt you or let you down or you feel unsure of how to 'read' people...if you choose friends that seem to hold values and qualities that make a good friend such as honesty, kindness and loyalty, this can help you to build trust with them...take your time to get to know people and if you feel you are perhaps on the autistic spectrum, you may find support and acceptance within a group for neurodiverse people..being with people that understand you, can help you feel less alone, as we all need to feel understood, this may also increase your confidence as you understand yourself and your challenges in social situations more.

No one is perfect and we all make mistakes, it's all a part of being human. Forgiving small mistakes is healthy in any friendship.

Perhaps you feel unconfident in your own abilities to form healthy friendships as you may have some anxiety and this makes being social quite draining for you.

Social interactions can feel more challenging if you feel self conscious and anxious or mistrustful.

We can feel alone when we feel no one understands us, so finding others that feel the same way or have similar challenges can help us feel more connected and less lonely.

It's also important that we trust ourselves, to be able to trust others.

Therapy can help you unpack challenges you have been through in the past, if any, and also to understand yourself a little better and this may also help increase your confidence to make friends as you can be more aware of how you are feeling and why and gain confidence in being open again with new friends.