My boyfriend often doesn’t want to hang out with my friends. How do I tell him this bothers me?

Socializing with others is a different and unique experience for us depending on who we are as people. Some of us really love to socialize and want to socialize with others. Others struggle to socialize, may be shy, but perhaps do want to socialize with others. While there are other people who don't like to socialize and are quite comfortable with that. It sounds like and your boyfriend are quite different in terms of socializing. It seems like you really enjoy it while your boyfriend may not so much. And acknowledging the difference is important as well as talking about it together. 

Some things to consider are is your boyfriend this way with everyone (not wanting to socialize)? Or is he this way just with your friends? If it's just with your friends, what is it about them that makes him uncomfortable to be around them? Everyone is different in terms of their reasons for not wanting to socialize with others. But some people are truly more introverted and feel comfortable being this way. And if your boyfriend felt comfortable being more on his own or away from people, what would this mean for you? There is no right or wrong way to socialize. What's more important, is to discuss if you two feel comfortable in how much you socialize with others? And if so, are you two comfortable being in a relationship with someone who may just have a different perception about socializing than you do? Just something for you two to consider. As long as you two can acknowledge and understand each other's differences, the relationship can work. It really will just be about how you two go about compromising if there are big differences.

It sounds like you really enjoy spending time with your friends and that this is important for you. Have you communicated this with your partner? Sometimes in relationships, when one partner is more social than the other, it can be quite difficult to come to an agreement with socializing with others. But when you communicate how important it is for you and what it means to you, it can make a difference in how your partner perceives it. For instance, if you say that having your partner present with your friends is important to you as it can demonstrate that your partner is taking an interest in your friends (who are important to you). You can even validate if your partner doesn't enjoy socializing as much as you do and wondering if he would be willing to come along sometimes. And if so, how often? This is something that you two can talk about and discuss together. You may want him to come along in seeing your friends every two weeks while he may only be okay with it once or twice a month. And after discussing it and compromising, reflecting on how you two feel about it. You two don't have to agree how important socializing with others is, but it can be worthwhile being aware of how important it is to each other. This way you both can better understand each other and reasons for wanting or not wanting to socialize with others. But really it all comes down to being open with him about feeling hurt when he doesn't come along.

There are some great books out there that can go more in depth about relationship differences and how to work together (such as socializing). If you feel like you need more support in better understanding how to navigate this, you can also look into your own mental health counseling services. If you feel like you need more support, you can also seek couple's counseling as well. Best of luck to you on your journey to heal.