What does attraction feel like?

Attraction feels different for everyone.  Just like every other emotion, attraction is experienced differently person-to-person.  Some people experience attraction in a very physical sense where they will have physical symptoms and signs that indicate whether they are experiencing attraction to another person.  Others feel attraction in their mind and within their emotional state.  Still others might experience both at the same time and have multiple signs indicating that they are attracted to somebody.

Some physical symptoms or signs of attraction are:

• Someone’s heart racing
• Dilated pupils
• Feeling as though one is flushed or blushing
• Dry mouth
• Sweaty palms
• Certain “gut” feelings (nausea, loss of appetite, “butterflies in the stomach”)
• Sexual arousal

Some emotional/mental signs of attraction are:

• Excitement or looking forward to talk to or seeing that person
• The desire to learn more about the person
• Thinking about someone more often they typically think about others
• Feeling remarkably comfortable with that person (even if it is only short time that they have known them)
• An internal “ease” that comes with being around or talking with that person.

One thing to remember is that there is such a thing as different types of attraction. Among the most common are physical/sexual attraction (a desire for physical or sexual contact with the person), emotional attraction (a desire for an emotional connection with a person), romantic attraction (a desire for romantic contact/connection with a person), and aesthetic attraction (attraction based on a person’s outward appearance that can be sexual or non-sexual).  Sometimes these attractions all happen at the same time and sometimes they are mutually exclusive. It is possible for someone to experience physical attraction but maybe not romantic attraction towards a person. Or, someone even aesthetically finds someone attractive but has no sexual desire or attractions towards them.  Likewise, a person might experience emotional attraction towards somebody indicating that they want to have a friendship, but they do not experience any sort of physical or romantic attraction towards them.  It is a perfectly normal aspect of life to experience different types of attraction and even having different kinds of attraction towards different people.  Attraction is not or does not have to be inherently sexual in nature.  Sometimes, it’s about knowing that there is an underlying desire to know a person or to be close with them even if that does not mean within the context of a sexual or romantic relationship.