What can I do to start living happier and stress-free?

First of all, I just want to normalize your feelings of stress.  People experience stress for all kinds of reasons. Some stress can actually be helpful, (positive stress can a big life change like getting married or starting a new job) but other types of stress due to negative stressors (financial troubles, legal issues, relationship stress) can lead to impacted quality of life. Writing out a list of the positive and negative stresses in your life can help clarify what all might be contributing to feelings of unhappiness.   

The adult phase of life can sometimes feel like an unlearning and relearning of what we think and believe.  Working through and processing any past trauma from childhood can be very helpful in the adult growth process.  Sometimes that means doing the work on our own (reading self help books, stress reduction workbooks, journaling, mindfulness etc) and sometimes it can be helpful to seek professional help to work through things.  Finding a good fit with a therapist is key to establishing a helpful therapeutic relationship.  

When clients are looking to lead a happier and less stressful life, I recommend a combination of mindfulness (breathing techniques and tools to apply in stressful moments) practicing gratitude, and journaling to get thoughts and emotions out.  There are a lot of things that you can do on your own but if you feel like you have already tried a lot and nothing has worked I would gently suggest thinking about talking to a mental health professional.  A therapist can help to lead and guide you toward your goals and also help to process any big or small traumas.  It can be very powerful to feel heard and seen and to have a safe space to talk.

You are the expert of yourself and your own life so you probably know what is helpful and what isn't.  Some level of stress is just a part of life but severe stress and worrying can impact sleep, eating, relationships, health and day to day functioning.  Sometimes it can be easy to pinpoint where stress is coming from and sometimes the stress turns into symptoms of anxiety that doesn't always seem to have an origin.  Whether you navigate this on your own or reach out to a counselor, life coach etc. I wish you the very best of luck.  Taking time for self care can be a big part of stress reduction as can getting plenty of rest, water and good nutrients.

We all deserve to live a content and meaningful life and wherever your journey takes you, I hope that you remember & believe that you deserve to be happy.  Your story doesn't have to end here and you can take the leap to create a new chapter at any point.  Life is short and we each have the ability to continue growing and learning & challenging any negative beliefs that we have.  Practicing self compassion can also be very helpful in reframing our outlook and seeing all of the good traits that we each possess.  

Warm Regards,

Elizabeth Gough, LCSW